Marie Roker-Jones take a wild guess at what goes on in the mind of small children.
The other day I posted on Facebook that I am frequently asking my preschooler, ‘Why did you do that?’ It’s gotten to the point where it’s a joke for us because I’m wasting time asking the question and most of his responses are out of this world.
So I’ve decided to try to figure out what little kids are thinking. Here’s what I came up with:
Walls look so much better when they are decorated with artwork. Markers and crayons work best.
Why is it called a smartphone if it’s letting me buy apps without my parent’s approval?
The living room is so much better for running around and making noise than your own room. A couch makes a great trampoline.
Things that belong to parents are made to taken apart and explored.
Just feel the music and dance. Don’t worry about how you look.
I won’t play with that kid just because you’re friends with his parents.
Stop asking “Why did you do that?” I don’t have an answer.
Some days I like to play quietly and some days I like to run wild, don’t judge me.
The dog or cat was asking for it.
Weekends are made for waking up at 6am.
It’s fun to flush stuff.
Parents are confusing. They tell you not to speak to strangers, then when you meet a stranger, they tell you to say hello.
Saying, “You look like Squidward from SpongeBob Squarepants is really a compliment.
No matter how many times I watch the same TV show, listen to the same song, read the same book or watch the same movie, I can never really get tired of it.
You can never have too many Lego pieces scattered around.
I don’t like to hug or kiss certain family members. Ask me to do it again and I’ll embarrass you.
You are responsible for the whereabouts of all my toys.
Even though I have my own bed, I just have to sleep in my parents’ bed.
If parents laugh when I say bad words, I’ll just keep saying them.
I am never tired. Never.
I may hear you say, “Who wants ice cream?”, but I can’t hear when you say, “It’s bedtime.”
I may not know time, but I know when all my favorite shows are on tv.
Clothing should always be optional.
Never tell me anything you don’t want me to repeat in public.
Farts are funny.
The dirtier, the noisier, the faster, stickier the better.
Why do I need to know how to tie my laces, when there are velcro straps on my shoes?
Scarves, gloves, hats, and sometimes jackets will get lost at school.
Let’s go with my plans because they sound better than your plans.
Don’t leave things lying around if you don’t want me to touch them.
When I’m on the move, don’t get in my way.
Don’t try to figure me out.
Why should bread have crust?
There’s a lot of things to do in the bathroom.
Keys, credit cards, and cell phones like to play hide and seek.
A french fry is a vegetable.
One day I will climb that wall just like Spiderman.
If I get made enough I can turn green just like the Incredible Hulk.
I am invincible.
Originally appeared at Raising Great Men.com