It’s Common: Men Going For Women Out of Their League. Intimacy Expert, Allana Pratt, sees the root cause of this behavior as…
Question: Allana, I constantly chase women that are out of my league (the unattainable). Do I just enjoy punishing myself or it there a reason why I focus on these type of women?
Answer: First off, she may simply NOT be out of your league except in your mind. Just go be yourself and see what happens.
Second, you may think you NEED this type of women to be enough, be cool, look good, show off, ‘make it.” In which case self esteem work is in your future.
Third, it’s a super common trend with my clients to go for someone unattainable, emotionally unavailable, someone who says they’re not interested and yet they still get infatuated with them… because it’s safe.
You get to live in your mind, create a fantasy, spin around either beating yourself up for not being good enough or blame them for not wanting you… yet either way you’re safe.
You’re not risking rejection. You’re not getting real or authentically connected. You’re not having intimate conversations and letting yourself truly be seen… and thus you don’t risk being burned, you burn yourself first. You don’t even get near the fire.
Yet sitting in the fire of the present moment, healing whatever’s in the way of you loving your WHOLE self, being real and exposing your authentic self to another human being… this is SO HOT! This is where the juice is! This is where adventure lies! This is savoring the unknown!
Yes, it’s messy. Hearts get singed. Yet bliss also unfolds. Ecstasy unleashes. Magic delights the Soul. When you’re present, authentic, real, truly going for it, willing to risk it all to have it all… you can FEEL the blood in your veins and you KNOW you’re alive and you can be GRATEFUL for this breath and this chance to connect intimately.
Yes, you might be betrayed, rejected, abandoned… and even THIS is amazing because you get the chance to evolve and realize that God/Universe/Source NEVER abandons you (not need YOU ever abandon you) which allows you to emerge “un-singe-able”… you realize that even if she leaves you, you never left you, nor did The Field.
Something always has your back. And only when we live fully and lose something we cherish, do we discover this. Or my coaching program can also take you home to find that place of security, safety, appreciation, oneness and total approval from within, just like my coaches did for me 😉 You need someone ‘on the other side’ to hold space, so you can surrender, and come home.
The super cool out come of this journey is that you no longer NEED nor RESIST super fabulous women no matter WHAT their league and you’re able to HAVE a hot healthy intimate partnership with them. Interested? My complementary report will get you started at www.GetHerToSayYes.com and yet until any deep seated wounds are healed so that you can actually BE the space of Home to bring your Queen Home… I recommend contacting my [email protected] requesting a strategy session to see if you’re a fit to work with me.
Deeper roots, higher shoots 😉 You’ll know if you’re ready. What an honor that would be.
Huge love and blessings, Allana