№1 recently messaged me asking me to move some money from the savings account that I manage for her to a new savings account that she has set up.
A fairly straightforward request I thought, but then, something in that suspicious part of my brain kicked in, and I needed to know more.
. . .
№1 doesn’t live with me (see this story for more information) but I’m still around helping her out with ‘life stuff’, but give our history I’m a little suspicious of her motives.
So I checked the bank account details she gave me online just to make sure they were for the bank that she said they were for.
They weren’t!
After a pause in the WhatsApp chat I receive a picture of a letter showing her name and address and different bank details.
After a further pause she explains that she made a mistake and the first details were for her other account. I’m now super suspicious, as you don’t really make mistakes like that.
After a slightly longer pause, I receive a picture of a letter that shows those bank details on it, but everything else on the letter has been redacted, including the name on the account! Alarm bells!!!!!
And then the communications dry up!
. . .
Why have I bothered writing about this?
I think many people like an easy life when it comes to their kids.
They agree too easily to giving them things, or letting them do things, and they don’t like to say “no” or “why” or “hang on a minute”, because they don’t want to upset the apple cart.
It’s easier to appease your child than it is to face another argument, slamming doors, accusations of unfair actions.
But it’s essential to help them and protect them. You never know what’s around the corner for them, and it’s your job to help make sure that it’s a good thing.
That sometimes means tough love. Or being a pain in the ass, and deliberately doing things that you know will piss them off but which are the right things to do.
Be strong!
. . .
I’ve not heard back from №1 after this incident, but I’ve spoken to her foster carer and she’s on the same page as me when it comes to this incident.
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This post was previously published on A Parent Is Born.
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