Good Men Project writer and editor Jeremy McKeen has a new book of essays out called You Don’t Have To Worry So Much, which focuses on his life as a teacher, dad, and thinker. Recently, writer and mental health advocate Sarah Fader sat down with him to talk about the book.
What inspired you to write You Don’t Have to Worry So Much?
The inspiration came from a poster I put up at the high school where I work. It said, “You don’t have to worry so much.” It was just sort of a tongue-in-cheek wall poster I wrote, a personal affirmation of sorts. It stayed up all year long, untouched. You have to understand that posters on the walls of a high school usually don’t stay up for too long. Kids either tear them down or they deface them, or the date passes. Yet, for some reason, the poster stayed up for the whole year. I always looked at it as I walked by, and I hoped that it served as some sort of comfort, or inside joke for students who walked by. I was looking for a title for the book and “You Don’t Have to Worry So Much” just kind of fit! It was the sign I was looking for, the same sign I used as the book cover.
You started with a different title. Tell us about that title.
Sure, the original title was “Prodigious Orange Dinosaur Machine Garden Party,” a culmination of people’s favorite words that I put together for a writer’s group years ago and have always loved. That title stuck with me, but I think “You Don’t Have to Worry So Much” is a little easier for the reader.
Many of the essays in your book are about parenting in some way. Tell us about being a dad.
Being a dad means everything to me. You fall in love by nature, and you have these amazing creatures that depend on you so much. And you have this opportunity to give them everything, and so to say that my life changed once I became a dad. It’s not cliche but it’s true for everybody. It affects you in a certain way, it makes you want to live, want to be a better person, it makes you want to start life over all the time. Because these little kids are learning everything for the first time. Being a dad suits me, it’s something I love, it’s like number one, not to short-change my wife, but to have a great wife like I do, and be a parent with her. I always say I’m the luckiest man alive. I know a lot of people say that, but I really do feel that way.
This is a long journey for you from a columnist at GMP to a book author. How did you get involved with The Good Men Project?
The Good Men Project was nice enough to run some of the posts I wrote a few years ago. They have an amazing philosophy and they have this wonderful agenda to really look at men’s issues, and fight against toxic masculinity. I started as a writer, and was lucky enough to get a column. Eventually, I started working with other writers, and they asked me to be an editor. From there on, I found a home. I was able to meet and bring on a lot of wonderful writers and editors, including you, Sarah Fader. It just fit! I did that for about four years. Then I stepped away to do some other writing projects. But The Good Men Project is still very close to my heart.
What do you like about being a teacher?
Being a teacher is closer than second nature at this point. I still think I was born an English major, and I want to be an English teacher. I think it’s the coolest job after all these years, it’s almost been 20 years. I love everything about it. I love the day-to-day. I love working with kids, I love English literature. I don’t think there’s a better job in a democracy than teaching. I feel fortunate that I get to be part of this big play that’s high school.
How is high school a play?
The actors are always coming in, you meet them when they’re freshmen. You teach them when they’re Sophomores, Juniors, and then Seniors. You see them grow. You see conflict, you see themes, and all these literary components. It’s amazing. It’s only second to raising your kids. They develop into real people. It’s like a 100,000 times better than people-watching because you get to be part of their lives. And then you know them forever, you have a friend forever, and a student-teacher relationship forever. It’s kind of the best thing there is.
What’s your favorite grade to teach and why?
I’m very partial to 11th grade because I love American literature, I love contemporary literature. And I love teaching the older kids, because we can get into deeper themes and characterization and talk about subjects and things that are a little heavier. Aside from the literature, I love writing with my kids. I love seeing them at the beginning of the year, what they’re capable of, and really coaching them through the year to become the best writers they can be and also seeing how the same things that I’ve been reading for years is approached by these kids. They get to approach the same canon of literature and still 20 years later, I still hear new things from kids and then when they hook on to an author who speaks to them, it’s the greatest thing.
What is your mental illness?
I have chronic migraines, which is from a concussion and it affects my life daily, and I wrote about it on GMP and in the book. But as for mental health, I have PDD, Persistent Depressive Disorder, or Bipolar II. If you have anxiety or depression, you learn how to live with them. They’re sort of like people you live with, and they’re not only a part of your personality, but part of your daily life. I have one essay that’s called the “Ready-to-Die But Still Alive Club” and it talks about life after being suicidal and after depression, at the same time living with those two things. And so one of the best things for me, when I was a columnist and I had to write an essay a week, was I got to write about these things to an audience that cares. People will write me and say, “hey I read this article, or I read this essay, and it spoke to me in a way that other people have never spoken to me.” And it’s like the greatest thing, because you know exactly what other people are going through, and they can read in you what they’ve gone through, it’s very meta-personal. So it’s like this amazing thing that’s happened through my writing.
Where can we find your book?
Where can we follow you online?
You can follow me on Facebook.com/JeremyMcKeenWriter, you can follow me on Instagram – @JeremyMcKeenWriter, and although I hate Twitter, you can follow me @McKeenish. And I’ll try to be better about liking Twitter.
#YouDontHaveToWorrySoMuch
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Listen to the podcast between Sarah Fader and Jeremy McKeen related to this interview:
Jeremy McKeen, editor for the Good Men Project, writer, English teacher and Aquarius talks about his upcoming book of essays – You Don’t Have to Worry So Much. Jeremy lives with Bipolar Disorder type II, his wife, kids and cats.
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This content is sponsored by Jeremy McKeen as part of The Good Men Project’s book promotion program. Contact GMP editor & sales rep Lisa M. Blacker for information on how you can promote your book on GMP.
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Photo credit: The author