What happens when you cheat on your wife and then get trapped in a Chilean mine? You get offered $100,000.
By now, you all know about Yonni Barrios, the 21st miner. He’s the one whose wife and mistress both showed up for vigils at the site of the landslide. Secretly, we all waited for Barrios to get pulled from the mine, hoping for some drama. He asked his wife and mistress to be there for his rescue, but only Susana Valenzuela, his mistress, showed up. They hugged, she cried, and that was that.
Looking to capitalize on the fame of the miners, AshleyMadison.com has offered Barrios $100,000 to be the website’s Spanish-speaking spokesperson. Who’s Ashley Madison?
Well, AshleyMadison.com is a dating site for people looking to be involved in an extra-marital affair. Yes, this is a real site. In fact, it appears to be thriving, with over 7,200,000 members. (We’re not linking because it doesn’t deserve one.)
“Life is short. Have an affair.” For $249 you—yes, you—are guaranteed to have a successful extramarital affair.
Naturally, the site was attracted to Barrios. It seems like a match made … err … several hundred feet below the surface of the earth. There’s a catch, though. Barrios must stay married to his wife of 28 years, Marta Salinas. Otherwise, there’s no deal.
With Salinas refusing to attend the rescue of Barrios and Valenzeula recently saying, “We’re going to be together from now on,” a deal doesn’t look likely.
If Barrios manages to accept, he’ll cement his place as our least favorite South American miner of all time.