Jamie Reidy applauds the naughty entrepreneur who is making cleaning up dirty.
This gives a whole new meaning to the phrase, “Does the carpet match the drapes?”
NPR shared an Associated Press report that police in a staunchly conservative West Texas city are keeping close tabs on a young entrepreneur’s recently opened cleaning service that offers nude maids.
Lubbock police Sgt. Jonathan Stewart said the owner of Fantasy Maid Service of Lubbock doesn’t have a permit to operate a sexually oriented business and officers are watching for any violation, which would bring a $2,000 fine.
Yeah, I’ll bet those cops are watching! Probably dropping quarters on the living room floor, too.
But owner Melissa Borrett insists she’s not operating such a business. Customers pay $100 an hour for one maid or $150 an hour for two maids, and no touching is allowed, she said.
Vitally important question: “no touching” refers to customers only, right? I mean, if I hire two maids they can touch each other.
“I run a maid service,” the 26-year-old entrepreneur said. “We really just clean houses. These girls are not performers. They’re maids.”
Suddenly, the French Maid fantasy is so 2011.
I’ve worked up some ideas for Ms. Borrett’s slogan:
“Where Floor Wax Meets Bikini Wax”
“We Scrub; You Chub”
“What’s Wrong with A Little Clean Fun?”
“We Mop with No Top”
This will be an automatic exception to the “No Women in The Man Cave” rule. Dudes will be spring cleaning monthly.
I always thought it crazy when women tidy up their homes because “the maid is coming today!” Isn’t that the point of having a maid, that she cleans up your mess so you don’t have to? But now I clearly see how that logic will cause guys to make a tough decision: leave a mess so she spends more time naked in his house, or clean up first so this naked woman doesn’t think he’s a total slob? The answer depends on self-confidence: is he a Closer or not?
Regardless of whether a male customer thinks he actually has a chance to close the deal with a naked maid, he definitely needs to upgrade his towels and sheets; don’t want her thinking he’s a cheapskate.
High comedy will ensue the first time a wife comes home to find her husband sitting on the couch with his feet up as the Naked Maid vacuums between the coffee table and the couch. “Honey, I thought I was just ordering a maid maid, I swear!”
I call dibs on the rights to the L.A. Franchise.
Any other slogans for Fantasy Maid Service?
Photo by: Jacrews7
I really like reading through a post that can make people think.
Also, thanks for allowing me to comment!
Often times, women are their own worst enemies. Until they stop putting themselves in these “positions” no PUN intended, they will be looked at as objects.
Well that’s not really a helpful argument. Firstly, it’s not up to women to cover themselves up. It implies two things, one that women can control how others see them, and two that men are slaves to their sex drives. Both are inaccurate.
Secondly, there is absolutely nothing wrong with appreciating the sexiness of a woman, so long as the observer doesn’t stop thinking of the woman as a human, and so long as the observer doesn’t start equating the woman with specific attributes. Same goes for appreciating the sexiness of men, by the way.
Cleaning windows with soapy tits makes a sexy woman? I repeat… Women are their own worst enemies.
Oh goodness gracious…yeah we already had a discussion about various ways in which a naked maid service could be considered sexy.
What I get from the females commenting on this thread, is that women shouldn’t be ashamed of their sexuality, but men should. Gotcha.
I feel you but its all of them here that feel that way.
Ooops forgot the “not”
As in not all of them here are like that.
From my pinko lefty pro-union point of view, I would want those housecleaners to have a lot of power to negotiate their working conditions, vis-à-vis the boss and vis-à-vis the customer. There may be health and safety issues involved with cleaning in the nude. For example, she ought to have the right to say that she wears knee pads or puts a cushion on the floor when scrubbing the bathtub. She ought to be able to demand the use of gloves when handling caustic cleaning chemicals. She can refuse to work in a rat-infested hoarder house without being fired for… Read more »
True, that.
Agreed. And not only that but I think I would impose a buddy system where at bare minumum a client must hire at least two maids to keep from one being sent out alone.
amen.
I’m on board with that too. Sex workers are in a respectable trade like any other, and deserve all the same rights and protections.
YES!
There’s a lot of guys, and women too, who get off on being told to do housework in the nude. I’ve known more than one woman who took advantage of the free nude maid service being offered by local fetishists. I suppose it’s not that surprising that people would charge for it, too.
How says this is all about sex? Such a rush to judgment. There are nudist/clothing-optional communities out there, and I think they ought to be able to hire housekeepers who will fit in with the lifestyle of the house. If the occupants don’t wear clothing, then it seems appropriate that the maids not wear it either. Other people are just really, really paranoid about their home security and have trouble trusting the help. If you’re obsessed with the fear that your housekeeper might steal from you, well, it’s more challenging if your housekeeper is nude. Is everything all about sex… Read more »
Should say “Who says”
Hell even when it is about sex does it automatically have to be bad? I could very easily imagine this becoming a hit with some fetishists. Maybe give clients the option of providing their own clothing for the maids to wear (pending the given maid’s approval first mind you).
No, I didn’t mean to suggest that if it’s about sexuality that it’s bad. Heck, no. I just think it’s funny that for so many people nudity automatically means sex. I don’t think “fetish” is a bad thing, either. That being said, I’m not so sure that enjoying looking at a nude woman in your house is much of a fetish. Certainly not some uncommon outlier of a fetish. I mean, it’s not like this would only appeal to 1% of the population. (And if it did, who cares? I’m just saying that this isn’t THAT kinky in the grand… Read more »
Could be a fetish for maids. Or a fetish for cleaning. Could be something of a power dynamic fetish…having someone work for you. That’s just off the top of my head. 😉
Sorry I wasn’t trying to say that you were I was trying to make that a general question in regards to the many people out there that do equate sex with being bad. As you say its funny that for many people nudity automatically means sex I say its messed up that for many people sex automatically means bad. My apologies. That being said, I’m not so sure that enjoying looking at a nude woman in your house is much of a fetish. In addition to what HeatherN says it could be a costuming fetish (which is why I said… Read more »
The Onion has ripped the cover off this shocking and bizarre behavior: http://www.theonion.com/articles/area-man-has-nakedlady-fetish,498/ “Area Man Has Naked-Lady Fetish” “Looking at Warren Geary, you’d never suspect. A respected business owner and devoted family man, the 41-year-old Geary, by all outward indications, would appear to be just like anyone else in this sleepy New England hamlet of 4,700. “But dig a little deeper, beyond the many years of PTA involvement and Kiwanis Club membership, and you’ll discover a very different Warren Geary, one who derives sexual stimulation and pleasure from the sight of unclothed women. This seemingly normal husband and father of… Read more »
I could swear this is already a thing in gay neighbourhoods.
This doesn’t seem new to me either. I seem to remember a case on one of the (millions of) court TV shows a case about a male former nude maid suing his boss for firing him for some reason.
Joe, thx for introducing me to a new acronym. Figured it out ABM and feeling pretty proud!
Erin & Quant, when in doubt between shaking my head and laughing, I try to choose the latter.
I might have Jamie, but after reading some of the guy’s response to what I said. I feel even a little more sad and beat down as a woman about these matters.
It seems the only thing that ever matters is that men of any age want young hot babes and the rest of us women can just screw ourselves if we feel our own amount of shame for what men are telling us they want most.
Do you have a partner atm? What does he say/desire? I see women of all ages seemingly wanting men who are “successful” but with a decent income but I also realize that part of that is my own insecurity. I suggest looking around at couples, you’ll find men of all ages are dating women of all ages, most commonly it is within 5 years age difference (at least where I am) so that is proof men and women do not all desire only young hot babes. Where are men telling you they only want young hot babes though? and which… Read more »
Do they have a website? I would think this idea is franchiseable lol
Qauntuminc, I feel much the same way. Not sure to laugh, shake my head or whatever. Is this really ingeneous? Not really. Selling the idea of sex to men with naked or barely naked women is nothing new. I will have to wait and see just how hard men want to fight certain negative stereotypes about themselves. A lot of guys take issue as only being projected a certain sexual way in the media. However, when these kind of services and products come out that specifically play on the most stereotyped elements of male sexuality, it’s up to men to… Read more »
Erin, you said “…when these kind of services and products come out that specifically play on the most stereotyped elements of male sexuality, it’s up to men to deny them.” Besides the obvious truth that NAMALT and the slightly less obvious truth that a little part of every man is *exactly* like that (to one extent or another…) would you really have us actually lie about our natures? Shouldn’t women, as a class, accept men, as a class, the way they are? Individuals are still free to define what’s acceptable for themselves. Of course, they have to live with the… Read more »
Exactly, Joe. Rather than defy these stereotypes, I say we take a page from the gay community and embrace them. “Damn right we love hot naked babes! And you know what? We’re not gonna be ashamed of it, OR apologize for it.”
What men need to do is stand up to the shaming tactics and declare proud ownership of the traits that are under attack. We need to turn the tables and transform the attacks into points of male pride instead.
Well…the lgbt community both embraces and defies stereotypes, really. Historically, I’d say that first we rejected the stereotypes in an attempt to fit into straight society…then we embraced them a bit more readily…and now we’re at a point where we’re saying that hey, we’re not only the stereotypes. It’s a bit of a – don’t put me in a box because I’m gay/trans/whatever, but also don’t hate me if I happen to fit into that box. So yeah for guys and sexuality I supposed it’d a bit like – don’t assume men are horndogs just because they’re men, but at… Read more »
“So yeah for guys and sexuality I supposed it’d a bit like – don’t assume men are horndogs just because they’re men, but at the same time don’t hate guys who happen to be horndogs.”
Yep this exactly.
Copyleft: Exactly, Joe. Rather than defy these stereotypes, I say we take a page from the gay community and embrace them. “Damn right we love hot naked babes! And you know what? We’re not gonna be ashamed of it, OR apologize for it.” Interesting. I think I’ll be right beside you saying, “Yeah I’m not all about the nookie like he is! And you know what? I’m not going to be shamed because you have a problem with his lust and I damn sure won’t apologize for his lust.” or “If you have have a problem with his lust then… Read more »
Which is it Joe, are all men “like that” or not? This is the exact issue I find so baffling. On one hand men say they don’t want to be seen a certain way, then when there are products that cater to men’s most base desires, it’s “party time”. And they will engage in behavior that is the exact opposite of how they say they want to be seen, holding the expectation, that they should still be seen a certain way even if their actions aren’t conveying that. Further, this has nothing to do with anyone asking men to lie… Read more »
“Which is it Joe, are all men “like that” or not? This is the exact issue I find so baffling. On one hand men say they don’t want to be seen a certain way, then when there are products that cater to men’s most base desires, it’s “party time”. And they will engage in behavior that is the exact opposite of how they say they want to be seen, holding the expectation, that they should still be seen a certain way even if their actions aren’t conveying that. ” The thing you’re failing to understand is SOME men like this… Read more »
Actually Archy, I am generalizing based on the actions of what I perceive to be many. I understand how much people like their qualifiers when discussing a subject but I didn’t qualify because I think my comments apply to the majority, not the miniority. I often find that people sometimes argue about the lack of qualifiers in a comment to avoid talking about the actual issue and focus too heavily on the ever popular, “not everyone is like that.” Of course, we ALL logically already know that “not everyone is like that”. But the fact that “not everyone is like… Read more »
“And this is a common thing I come across when discussing men. This double messages that are so hard to understand.” I think this is a huge part of the issue. Many women have a hard time how they can feel “special” by being chosen by a man (and choosing that man) if the man is also (oftentimes) interested in other women (at least in visual form). The answer to the question “am I not enough for him” is, in part, “No, you are not, not really, but yes, you are enough for him too, at the same time.” But… Read more »
Craving noveltly and play and variety in a relationship can be a good thing. These are things I know I crave. But not all these things have to come in the form of x amount of different people to be exciting. They can come in so many other variations. But for men, it always seems to come down to quantity of women vs. quality. And they seem to unfairly want it both ways. And with technology driving the demand, the need grows even greater for even more variety as the anty is upped. As the “quality” women a man picked… Read more »
I understand your frustrations. It’s a very difficult thing to manage. But I will say, and I know you’ve already pointed out the NAMALT pov, but it’s true. At least to the point of “men wanting everything their way and then acting liek they do women a favor just by being in a relationship with them” There are a LOT of men who love being in relationships. Where it isn’t a favor to one, but a deep love. And I also don’t think that it’s wrong for men to find other women attractive. Or women men. Or women women. As… Read more »
Julie, I’m not saying the “not all men are like that” pov isn’t true. I’m saying that this is something we all logically already know. But if this is what it’s always going to come down to, then GMP might as well not even exist. Because if everything is going to be simply chalked up to “not everyone is like that” and “ to each their own”, this board wouldn’t be so popular. These are over simplifications to the deeper issues many want to discuss. Apparent by the popularity of GMP. That’s my issue with such phrases. And yes, I… Read more »
Erin, would you say more about this? ” But if this is what it’s always going to come down to, then GMP might as well not even exist.” Or email me? I’m really unsure as to what it means.
Just, on the topic of generalizations: In general (see what I did there?), I’ve noticed that negative generalizations tend to be spoken or written in very broad ways. Your own example, “men seem to want…” has no qualifier to the term “men.” It’s unclear whether you mean most men, some men, all men, etc. So when I read that I tend to assume you mean either most or all. Often I’ve found that when someone is responding to a generalization, they’re mostly just trying to point out the outliers, and so they’ll often end up speaking with more qualifying adjectives.… Read more »
Julie – I was trying to explain that if a conversation is always going to come down to the idea of, “Everyone is different and everything is A-Okay and we should all just accept everything because some people like it this way and others like it that way”, then we really have nothing to discuss on any subject here. If we all really thought this way, then there wouldn’t be so many different ideas shared on the board. Not sure if that clears things up. Let me know. HeatherN, negative and positve generalizations on this board are spoken in broad… Read more »
I’m not trying to attack you or anything, first off, but the problem is that without qualifiers we can’t know whether you mean most or some. And there is a huge difference between saying ‘most’ men are like such-and-such, and saying many men are like such-and-such. If someone is going to make the claim that most men behave in a certain way, they need to provide evidence to back it up, evidence that goes beyond personal experience. If someone makes the claim that many men, or some men behave in such a way, the burden of proof is less, because… Read more »
Erin, without those qualifiers you actually start to sound like a misandrist. That’s the problem, you are stating facts and it can easily be read as all men, or some men. There is no clarity in your argument, it’s the same kind of speech I see used by racists, bigots, etc and that is a problem. You assume they’re intelligent enough to realize what you’re saying based on what? Your comments can be read in a few ways, 1 is ok, the other is quite bad and that’s why I am pointing it out. Don’t you realize that stating facts… Read more »
It’s interesting, your frustrations are common to men in regards to what women want in different areas of life. From what I gather based off popular stereotypes I hear men want quantity, women want perfection (not quality). By perfection I mean the partner that they CHANGE into what they want, an ideal bf that strips away his previous behaviour because it’s “immature”, “selfish”, and other words of shame used to deny his ability to be his own self. This all might be true for some but not for all, variety can be desired by both sexes, hell of the women… Read more »
Word. I’d just like to reply to a couple of things in this: “I’ll ask the ladies, do you fantasize about the same man/woman?” Short answer, nope…not even when I’ve been in relationships. And no, it didn’t mean I was any less into her…but really when masturbating or having sex, it’s a lot less fun if you’re worrying about where your brain’s going. “It could simply be to be turned on by the ACT of sex.” I’d like to touch on this, because I think it brings up a great point. Why do straight men watch straight porn? If you… Read more »
I like seeing the male actors with similar body shape to me, it actually helped my self esteem a bit knowing there was amateur porn with overweight men that weren’t limited to just overweight women, a variety of shapes n sizes between the 2 were engaged in sex and I’d assume also to be dating judging by the type of porn it was. It can give hope when you’ve been told you’d only be dating the 1-5’s and you were a 4 or something, it’s nice to know that the whole attraction number thing isn’t always the case. I also… Read more »
Yeah, I think I was just trying to point out that someone watching porn isn’t necessarily fantasizing about having sex with the people on screen. So thanks for providing even more variety to it. 🙂
And as for the chemicals…frankly I think it’d be a great way to promote greener cleaning products.
Either promote green cleaning products or score big time with clients with a latex fetish…
HeatherN, I don’t feel attacked by you. Anymore then you should by me. We disagree. I have explained myself on qualifiers. I don’t feel the need to re-address the previous points I made. Getting overly distracted by qualifiers and using that as a point of discussion instead of the actual discussion is my point. I think the core issue of the subject is easy to figure out with having to qualify every single thing in the process. Positive generalizations don’t get criticized because they are positive and no one has any issue lumping large groups of people together in generalities… Read more »
“Not praising every element of male sexuality and talking about where I think there are issues in male sexuality does not make me a misandrist.” Generalizing negatively and stating negative traits on men does make it misandrist though, so you can try to dance around the subject but lack of clarification will put you into that category. Your intention may not have been misandrist but how are we to know? We all need to be careful of how we use generalizations because they’re commonly used in very negative ways, some of which I’ve found you doing and I’m trying to… Read more »
You know because you read what I say. Everything I say. Not just the bits and pieces you want to pick out to label me hateful because I didn’t say everything perfectly to the “t” the way *you* wanted me to say it. Or you ask me what I meant. You don’t go on a witch hunt and make casual links to me being a bigot and a misandrist and all the other names you came close to attaching to me because my response didn’t fit into *your* perfect idealized definition of a good conversation. There are comments above that… Read more »
Archy, I am going to touch on a few things you talked about. I hadn’t really gotten the time to do this for several days. You said: “I’m sure there are guys that can desire variety in porn, but still desire their woman massively.” I agree. I just don’t think this is the positive that you think it is. What this says to me is that men want it both ways. They want to fulfill their whims and fancies for other women AND have a loving woman to come home to. Who I am sure they do love. It is… Read more »
It sounds to me that women are saying it’s good for men to express what they want… but that they should want something else, something that makes women feel better about themselves. I would point out that women have been telling men what THEY want for quite some time now–and quite blatantly, in the form of explicit criticism of how men don’t measure up to their standards. Men have largely been told to accept these criticisms with good grace and humility, as “learning opportunities” for us to become better people (i.e., more acceptable to the opposite sex). Perhaps women should… Read more »
Misandrist/misogynist would be applying a negative label to the entire gender, now I probably didn’t make it clear enough but I don’t think you are misandrist but without clarity your words can appear to be misandrist. Does that make sense? If you feel the majority of men are doing something negative, then yeah say “I feel most men, many men, some men do x”. I don’t have issues with people expressing what they feel based on their experience, what I dislike is when people state it as fact of life vs fact of personal observation. On the porn topic: It… Read more »
“This seems to be a kernal of the conflict when I see women and men argue over porn. Many women see (qualifier here) men as justifying something that those men know causes women anxiety. Lots of generalizing in there but I think it sums up what Erin’s getting at. And because I feel I have to say it, no I do not believe all men or all women feel this way.” I know a few women who aren’t bothered by porn so it appears only some women are insecure from porn. I know of women who watch it as much… Read more »
Archy, it doesn’t make sense. You don’t think I am a misandrist but you are suggesting I talk like one. But if you don’t think I am misandrist, then it’s clearly because a good chunk more of my comments reflect infact not being a misandrist then there are that reflect me being a misandrist. I am not perfect. My comments won’t be perfect. If you see enough to come to the conclusion that you don’t think I am misandrist, then give me a benefit of the doubt for the parts you don’t think come across well. And lets have a… Read more »
Well you just did the job for me of illustrating it to copyleft (try to focus who you are talking about copyleft). The comments are also getting buried very deep in this tree. I originally just wanted you to realize the problem can arrise in the lack of the qualifier, because I myself was confused by your intent. I didn’t THINK you were misandrist but some of the stuff you said was raising my eyebrow, I wanted a little bit of clarity to understand it better and just wanted you to be aware of it in the future. I want… Read more »
I’ve been away for a few days, didn’t get around to calling him out on it but I have now, thanks for the highlighting of it. At the time I felt you did ok at calling him out. Reason I said the other stuff was simply to show how negative stereotypes can be quite bad to use, what I see in your comment is trying to portray all men as wanting their cake n eating it too, some men saying they want x and others wanting y yet you imply men want both at the same time? Would it be… Read more »
I missed this comment before but how can you assume every man has a little bit of that? Many men maybe, but all men? How can we assume all people to be of the same characteristic? It’s not like saying men need water to survive…
Qauntuminc, I feel much the same way. Not sure to laugh, shake my head or whatever. Is this really ingeneous? Not really. Selling the idea of sex to men with naked or barely naked women is nothing new. I will have to wait and see just how hard men want to fight certain negative stereotypes about themselves. A lot of guys take issue as only being projected a certain sexual way in the media. However, when these kind of services and products come out that specifically play on the most stereotyped elements of male sexuality, it’s up to men to… Read more »
Ultimately, it comes down to a woman’s ability to choose such work for herself. And that’s at the root of whether sex work should be embraced or banned. This is sex work. Even if she’s cleaning a house, she’s being hired as eye candy… And that’s completely fine if you believe the women who are engaging in sex work truly have choices. Personally, I do. I wish more sex work were legal so it could be properly monitored and the women and men could be more properly protected by the law and not shamed. One cannot really condemn someone for… Read more »
” it’s up to men buck the trend on services that overtly play to their most base desires.”
Why is the desire for sex a base one?
Yeah, I can see where you’re coming from, but so long as it’s consentual and fun then I don’t see the need to take it seriously.
Personally, instead of hoping for the day when I can’t hire a naked maid service I’d prefer to hope for the day when you can hire a naked mechanic. 😉
When in doubt, arrest–and then define the laws later? Gotta say that approach to justice doesn’t appeal to me.
Go, nude maids! The more of this type of service, the better.
These sorts of jokes always make me feel conflicted. On one hand they do seem funny at first. On the second hand they imply that men are perverted bastards only interested in titties, hardly an appropriate theme for The Good Men Project. On the third hand I can’t really see the harm in it, certainly no worse that stripper bars and jokes about strippers.
If I was Sgt. Stewart, I would go ahead and fine the maids, just to set up the court case where a qualified judge can more clearly draw the line on the matter.
Back when I lived in Phoenix a million years ago there was a place to get your haircut by women in lingerie. Being 18 years old and a drunk, this sounded like a fantastic idea. Alas, ‘milf’s with scissors’ was a lot more like an OK haircut and a lot less like a fantasy afternoon when I was done shelling out thrice what I would have paid Mario, my regular guy.