Men’s body image problems are no joke. Noah Brand joins a live discussion on the subject tonight.
This evening, at 9:30 PM Eastern time and 6:30 Pacific, Good Men Project editor-in-chief Noah Brand will be appearing on HuffPost Live as part of a round-table discussion on the subject of men’s body image issues. Noah has previously addressed his own struggles with self-image in “I’m Stark Naked: Deal With It” (warning: exactly what it sounds like). Also appearing will be bodybuilder Gregg Valentino and Inquire magazine editor Devin MacDonald, so it should be a lively conversation. Fix some snacks, invite the neighbors over, make an evening of it.
I can’t believe someone would think this is an overblown issue and I can’t believe someone would think that fat women find it easy being fat. Can we please put ourselves in others’ shoes? Of course men have body image issues; they are being assaulted every day by impossible images that don’t particularly look like real men. Isn’t this is a problem with straight porn? I personally don’t understand why anyone wants to look at naked bodies with no pubic hair, bleached vulvas, etc, and I find the ideal male body as defined by our society unappealing. I’ve started looking… Read more »
Toby’sgirl
No, I am not bothered about the hot perfect looking Ken dolls in male modelling, porn and movies.
I am bothered by what I can achieve in the real world. How desirable I am to women.
But, Tim, those images are telling women what’s attractive about men as well. I used to think pumped-up men (bulging muscles, thick necks, etc) were a gay thing, and now women think pumped-up men are hot. I guess I’m in a minority, but what makes men hot is how comfortable they are in their bodies (ditto for women), and for me, I like men who USE their bodies. Nothing sexier than a man being physical!
I think majority of women find men with athletic fit bodies are hot, and its biologically, not because of of images created by media. And what I mean athletic fit bodies are not pumped up muscular like bodybuilders and fitness models, but like athletes. Personally I’m not bothered if women find men with athletic bodies hotter than fat men, like most women I’m sure not really bothered by the idea that men like looking at women with slim curvy bodies. Because I think we ( men and women ) want to find an achievable goal to make us more desirable.… Read more »
Tobysgirl Maybe. I think what women are attracted to is more instinctual than shaped by magazines. Tall, broad, square jawed, handsome guys always were and always will be considered desirable. Culture can influence things to an extent. My point was that if I’m getting womens attention, if I getting dating opportunities, I’m getting laid frequently with a variety of women, then that alone validates my desirability and I would care less about not measuring up to the men on magazine covers. (Sadly that’s not the case with me) I can see women who are average looking and/or chubby and they… Read more »
Fat women need to be told they are desirable, they are made to feel good about themselves. “Beauty comes in all shapes and sizes”. Then we have BBW’s, chubby chaser phenomenon. We talk about how fat women are discriminated in the dating scene. We talk about fat women’s self esteem and so on. Fat women are told to embrace their curves and fat rolls. The fat men, on the other hand, can just go to hell. I mean everybody knows a fat man is a two-penny, right? Fat men aren’t supposed to be desirable. What woman would desire a fat… Read more »
@Tim Parsons: I think I sense some frustration and while Im not fully down with your expression of it I understand it. To be sure there are problems that fat women have to deal with today. That’s all I’m going to say about that. Why? Because I’m beyond sick of the tendency to measure the experiences of fat men and the scope of those experiences by how fat women are affected. There are about a godzillion and one stories, articles, posts and everything else about women and body image issues (think about this, how often do you see anything that… Read more »
“I’m beyond sick of the tendency to measure the experiences of fat men and the scope of those experiences by how fat women are affected.” Can you please elaborate on that. Men are human too and they dont have a lesser need to feel desired. I can assure you that fat women are considered more desirable than men. “There are about a godzillion and one stories, articles, posts and everything else about women and body image issues” Why is whats on the magazine covers, more important to women than the validation they get from men? You are right, there is… Read more »
Me: “I’m beyond sick of the tendency to measure the experiences of fat men and the scope of those experiences by how fat women are affected.”
Tim: Can you please elaborate on that.
Sure. Take a look at articles and posts about male body issues. How many of them can actually talk make it through the entire piece without having to bring up women and body image issues? Unfortunately most of them fail miserably because about 95 times out of 100 pieces about male body image issues actually START (and sometimes end) with a nod to female body image issues.
Case in point Tim. Listen to the recording. They get to about the 12min. mark before the “But women have it worse.” comes in. That is exactly what the hell I’m talking about. I know that some folks would probably think that I’m going to some extreme and tell me that it’s not right to keep it separated since it’s an issue that harms men and women. To those people I ask, where was that attitude when male voices were getting shut out on the topic? As you can tell now Tim this is something that hits a spot with… Read more »
They must be having difficulties on that video. I was in the middle of listening to it when it just stopped playing. Now when I try to play it it just attempts to lad and then stops. Hopefully it will be functional tomorrow.
THANK YOU!
I work with women and men struggling to get their bodies out of the way of their success and Noah’s article is one I share All. The. Time! Yes, this is absolutely something that affects men and is FAR from being overblown! It may look different than it does with women, but it’s still there.
I am with clients for most of the panel tonight, but will be catching the recording.
It’s interesting but I can’t help feeling this is something of an overblown issue. Personally I have known far too many girls and young women struggle with eating disorders, more than I can easily count. Offhand I can’t think of one young man of my acquaintance who’s had anything like a similar experience, or even any who works out a bit too much.
Question.
By what measure are you using to say that this issue is being overblown?
I believe the problem is that we don’t hear about guys talking about body image issues that much because its still kept under relative wraps under the premise that “real men don’t talk about their feelings”. Just like any other walk of life on the planet men are indoctrinated with ways to keep them from speaking up about the things that harm us.
Also, this is the kind of thing it *makes sense to overblow*, because then you can actually address it before it becomes an even bigger problem. Whether or not it’s a “big” problem doesn’t make it a non-problem.
Danny’s right. You don’t hear about it because it’s not culturally acceptable for men to talk about eating disorders, body image issues, etc… But that doesn’t mean it’s not there.
Prisicely Joe. Let’s take the lines of logic of “I don’t know anyone that suffers from this so it must not be a big problem.” and “It’s not that widely talked about so it must not be a big problem.”. That would mean: 1. Before the 1960s there were no problems with women not being able to advance in the workplace. Hey they weren’t talking about so it must not have been a problem right? 2. Before the 1860s slavery must not have been that big of a deal since no one was pointing out wrong it was right? 3.… Read more »
Unfortunately I have a prior engagement that I cannot avoid so I won’t be able to catch it live. Will it be recorded for future listening?
Should be, yes. That link should remain solid, and just turn into the recorded version after it airs. That’s my understanding, anyway.