Tom Matlack wonders if the Penn State incident remained hidden for so long because what happened was beyond the scope of men inside football to even comprehend.
Daniel Mendelsohn, a professor at Bard College and well-known critic, asks us in today’s New York Times to consider the role of gender and homophobia in the events at Penn State.
“WHAT if it had been a 10-year-old girl in the Penn State locker room that Friday night in 2002?” he asks us.
His answer is that everything would have been different. The rape of a female child by an old man would have fit into the neat groove of what to do as a studly football player: beat the shit out of the guy and press charges. But the homosexual nature of the crime revealed a huge blind spot in sports where macho and homo just don’t mix. Fear enters the picture. Sexuality that is inexpressible, underground, and hidden if it raises its head out of the fox hole.
Real men beat each other at the line of scrimmage. On that topic please go read Kris Jenkins View of Life in the NFL Trenches, also out today. “You ever been in a car crash? Done bumper cars? You know when that hit catches you off guard and jolts you, and you’re like, what the hell? Football is like that. But 10 times worse. It’s hell.”
So real men don’t make out with each other or, a thousand times worse, fondle boys. It’s just beyond the scope of a man inside football to even comprehend. It has to be covered-up. And yet what is at stake here is a definition of manhood that we as a country can live with. One that has depth and compassion as well as strength. What PSU showed us, according to Mendelsohn, is that we are still a long way from any of that.
What lurks behind so many male athletes’ vociferous antipathy to homosexuality seems to be deep anxiety about masculinity, the very quality that aggressive team sports showcase. After all, a guy is never so much a guy as when he’s playing a violent game or hanging with his teammates afterward in the showers and locker rooms, “horsing around.” The familiar ferocious anti-gay swagger many athletes affect is likely meant to quash even the faintest suspicion that anything tender or erotic animates naked playfulness between men.
But true masculinity, like true sportsmanship, contains other virtues, too: forthrightness, honesty, fair play, courage in difficult situations, readiness to acknowledge error, concern for the weak as well as admiration for the strong. In their handling of Mr. Sandusky, the leaders of Penn State’s legendary football program failed to display a single one of these qualities. Maybe it’s time for a new kind of sports hero. What else are we supposed to conclude when grown men, trained to brave 300-pound linemen, run away from boys in trouble?
Amen to that, which isn’t to say that we don’t still have a very long way to go with dealing with sexual abuse of women. Just that at least inside sports we have some idea what the heck that is. When it comes to homo-erotic actions in the locker room, whether healthy or criminal, we can even begin to talk about it. And it’s about time we did.
Nah.
Look this is really simple. In our society women (and girls) are protected far more than men and boys. actually its not just our society but every society on earth and in recorded history I think…. had it been a girl she would have been protected.
Just to the commentators who seem to think that this is a thought experiment with no directly citable real world event: its not. Female as well as male clergy abuse victims were equally covered up by the church to protect its integrity. When these victims came out they were equally shamed by some of the more right wing members of the community, but in general were equally recognised as genuine victims. The only part of the ugly mess that related to this argument was that male victims took longer to come forward about the abuse they suffered, probably due to… Read more »
In short, if it had been a girl in the shower it wouldn’t have made a difference. Except that one of the victims would have come forward sooner. The paedophile priest scandals leave no reason to believe that a female victim would have been treated any differently.
I’ve read several “What if…” articles regarding the witnessed shower rape. I appreciate the scenarios the articles put forth, in an attempt to frame the issue in a more relatable context. What’s missing from all of the articles, including this one, is a clear dialogue about the following: 1. Homosexuality is a normal sexual identity, and has nothing to do pedophilia 2. This is not about sexuality, it is about power and child abuse 3. It is also about the powerful college athletics industry that prioritizes image and money above law and morality While I understand the connection of a… Read more »
I agree with most of what you’ve said here and is the point I tried to make in my comments. The author should, instead of asking “What if it had been a girl in the shower?” ask, “What if the abuser hadn’t been a famous football coach at a top tier football program?” That is the heart of why this went on so long and why there is guilt on so many people’s hands. There was something rotten in the core of the Penn State program and as a result, Sandusky was free to prey on children. It doesn’t matter… Read more »
The entire premise of this article is ridiculous and the author provides no evidence of the hypothesis. This hypothesis that this went on so long because of sports society’s inability to handle homosexual acts doesn’t hold any weight given that it includes administrators who turned the other way, as well as police officers (the officers overheard what was essentially a confession to one of the mothers and did not act), not just “jocks.” Such a claim is actually alarmingly naive. It attempts to put blame on “the rest of us” for somehow not being accepting enough of homosexuality to recognize… Read more »
What if it had been a female coach abusing the boy? Or a female coach abusing a girl? We could play the “What If” game all day but I think it’s a ridiculous thing to do. Now you’re (not just you Tom, but commenters also) blaming a group of people for something that didn’t even happen, and literally making up what you think they would’ve said in different circumstances. It’s fiction and conjecture. Hardly the stuff I want to read about the Penn State controversy. I believe people were horrified because it was a child. Boy or girl, I don’t… Read more »
I agree. Debating possible scenarios and outcomes had this horrible situation presented itself in any number of different ways is purely speculative. But then again, so is this piece. Tom could easily have a point and perhaps it’s an issue worth discussing, but it should be done separately from this case. Ultimately we don’t know what JoePa’s motive for cover-up was. The “homosexual nature” of the act, the desire to protect the reputation of an organization he had spent most of his life devoted to, the fact that maybe the guy is just a real asshole. We don’t know, we… Read more »
I’m interested in the pushback I am getting for writing this here and on FB/Twitter from those who argue that I am saying that I am minimizing sexual abuse of women/girls (which I am not) and somehow connecting pedophilia with healthy homosexuality (which I also am not). I am quite clear on the massive under-reporting of sex trafficking and rape of young girls. Full stop. No one needs to try to convince me of it. I am convinced and write about it frequently. I also am quite clear that pedophilia in no way colors whether or not homosexuality is a… Read more »
Tom – There is clear evidence of Homophobia is sports and at PSU. There is even concern that JoePa was manifesting and supporting Homophobia against PSU Policy from 1992 onwards. Did Homophobia as in disgust cause people to think and act a particular way – as in the primary motivation? I think not. But when you have an institution which has a pubic face and a private one rules by internal conflict, it gets very hard to act the right way. It becomes more about keeping the crew happy rather than sailing stormy seas. Any good captain knows when that… Read more »
I hear you, Tom, but the reason I was one of those getting that wrong impression was from this: But the homosexual nature of the crime revealed a huge blind spot in sports where macho and homo just don’t mix. If it had been a man raping a girl in the shower, would it make sense to talk about “the heterosexual nature of the crime”? Not really, because that would be implying something inherently criminal or deviant about being heterosexual. It would just be considered a crime, not a heterosexual crime. Making a point to describe it as a “homosexual… Read more »
Okay Marcus but in order to talk about the impact of homophobia in the cover up you have to acknowledge that the crime was homosexual in nature.
Well Tom it was Pedophile In Nature. But as with all things social change has to be factored in.
It’s an interesting statistic that 80% of people support LGBT rights, but they only believe that 30% of other people do. Social Perceptual Bias is a complex issue.
If some old guard types at PSU are living in the past and mixing issues, that makes it almost worse! If society has moved on it even makes the anger more valid. It’s not just anger at what has happened, but also ad the underlying factors – real or perceived.
How many pedophiles identify publicly as hetero? I’m asking as I don’t know.
Oh my smart friends, how I love this discourse! I somehow agree with all of you in ways. Guessing what would happen if it were a girl rather than a boy is basically a thought experiment, as really we’re just exploring here. I think what I’m most interested in here is the idea that the same-sex nature of abuser and victim somehow caused a sense of shame within the witnessed that ran deep enough for him to run away and keep it a secret. Perhaps that shame came from a larger and more profound shame about any sort of same-sex… Read more »
“You guys (men, in general) have been the ones in control of sexuality for thousands of years, as a group.” Women have controlled sexuality since time began. It’s up to the man to win over the woman, as woman have 1 timeperiod of childbearing and must be selective whereas a male could impregnate many females. Our culture runs the automatic males always want sex stereotype which gives females the power of choice. A man will be shamed for not having sex, a woman will be shamed for having sex. If he is more likely to choose to have sex and… Read more »
Julie – current research indicates that it’s the same as the general adult population, but……. At the same time, pedophilia is also seen as a Unique Sexuality in and of itself. So is the person who is married with kids shamming to hid they are a pedophile, or do they even have two sexualities. If they target same sex kids they could even be seen as having three sexualities. Then throw in the mix of Legal Definitions, Psychiatric Definitions and even where the age boundaries are drawn and it gets very messy. Hebephilia – Ephebophillia – and other terms that… Read more »
“At the same time, pedophilia is also seen as a Unique Sexuality in and of itself.” GLBT advocates do not like it when pedophilia is called a “sexuality” or an “orientation.” Supposedly, it may malign them by association. Why is pedophilia set aside as a category unto itself? Is it set aside solely for moral and legal reasons? Has there been some kind of research indicating that pedophiliac sexual attraction is psychologically and/or physiologically distinct? Some pedophiles are gender indiscriminate and target children of any sex. So perhaps those persons may fit into the “unique sexuality” hypothesis. However, sexual/gender preference… Read more »
“GLBT advocates do not like it when pedophilia is called a “sexuality” or an “orientation.” Supposedly, it may malign them by association.” Totally agree and see exactly where you are coming from Megalodon! However – it does not change the ways that medicine, neurophysiology and other disciplines are looking at the subject. The use of function MRI scanning is revealing a great deal about how some brains are hard wired and control behavior – even behavior labeled antisocial and immoral. There are already cases where evidence of Brain Abnormality has meant that death penalty has not been applied. Only a… Read more »
To me, part of the homophobia is perceiving the crime as homosexual in nature. Yes, it was a same-sex crime, but if it was opposite-sex sex abuse, I don’t think we’d be calling it a heterosexual crime, would we? I don’t know if Sandusky self-identified as religious, but if he did, would we call his actions [fill in the faith] crime? He’s married, so was it a bisexual crime? It’s a subtle point, and I’m not accusing you of being homophobic, but I think referring to it as “a homosexual crime” perpetuates the homophobia, rather than just making it possible… Read more »
Perhaps it didn’t need to be said is your point but what Tom said was and is factual. Marcus, but the crime was a forced homosexual sex act on a small boy, which is relevant to the victims if there are heterosexual. So, not only was it a crime but, as boys who are heterosexual have pointed out (when they have grown older) they were even more traumatized because it caused sexual confusion. Girls who are raped by men have trauma but not the added homo/heterosexual confusion that boys face as they get older. So, Tom’s statement is entirely valid… Read more »
Wow – so if you are a young female and raped by a male – and lesbian, you suffer less long term trauma and no confusion over sexuality? I’d love to see the stats to back up the argument! Children who are sexually abused within the context of their own sexuality do not have to deal with sexuality confusion as they grow up? Plain Wrong! Many Do! How about a young female who is sexually assaulted by another woman, and there is no penetration and so no rape? The young female is heterosexual. According to some she should have no… Read more »
“Wow – so if you are a young female and raped by a male – and lesbian, you suffer less long term trauma and no confusion over sexuality?” “I’d love to see the stats to back up the argument!” Feel free to answer that since I didn’t comment on it. “Children who are sexually abused within the context of their own sexuality do not have to deal with sexuality confusion as they grow up? Plain Wrong! Many Do!” I never said that weren’t the case. The point is whether that boy is a homosexual or not. If he is heterosexual… Read more »
“I never said that weren’t the case. The point is whether that boy is a homosexual or not. If he is heterosexual but was raped by a man, it causes confusion. Many men have said as much. This is simple.”
It does not matter the gender of the Victim or their sexuality at the time of the assault – victims having sexuality issues post event is common to all. The sex and sexuality of the attacker is not a determining factor.
You seem to be hung up on sex and sexuality to prove points.
You’ve offered no basis for your claims or your disagreement with my points.
A boy raped by a man may have issues related to his homo/heterosexuality that a girl raped by a man would not thusly have. That’s quite obvious viewed with any objectivity at all.
It does not matter the gender of the Victim or their sexuality at the time of the assault – victims having sexuality issues post event is common to all. The sex and sexuality of the attacker is not a determining factor. Actually one’s gender and sexuality CAN have an effect on the trauma they suffer. A straight guy raped by a guy may be conflicted if he felt some sort of pleasurable response (such as, “I’m straight but I had an erection.”) A straight woman raped by a woman my be conflicted for the same reason (like, “I’m straight but… Read more »
Here is an exercise for everyone on here who thinks that abuse of women/girls doesn’t get much press coverage. Go to http://www.cnn.com for the next month, count how many days you don’t see a story about abuse of a woman/girl, the murder of a woman/girl or an article detailing how bad women/girls have it in todays world. I highly doubt you will see a single day without a headline on the front page without one of those stories. This story is getting big press because it was a well known sports figure who got charged, not because of the gender… Read more »
Agreed. You don’t even have to follow a news site for a month. Just look at when a high profile case breaks. 9 times out of 10 the victim in said case is a girl/woman. Now folks can fool themselves into thinking that’s the case solely because girls/women are more likely to be victims of such violence if they want to. Hell look at a lot of the high profile missing child cases. The vast majority of them are (white) girls. Switching the victim to a girl wouldn’t automatically translate into not being taken seriously because its pretty clear (or… Read more »
Males are victims of assault, including sexual assault, 3x more often than females. Males are murdered 4x more often than females.
I think that I agree… but it’s hard to say. I do see some Siu’s comment – there are still a lot of (completely irrational) reasons to cover-up anything that will bring down a hero among us- especially in the high-power, high-money world of sports. However – I do think the point remains: The fact that it was a little boy makes it somehow easier to turn the other cheek. I know that sounds weird but… because it was a little boy, and because of all the homophobia in sports, it doesn’t fit into the clear picture of sexual abuse… Read more »
It is clear that it our society does not act to protect boys as it does girls. This is one of a number of examples of that. Boys and girls certainly aren’t the same but boys should at least be respected as people.
The boy will be expected to be stoic, unable to confide his emotional devastation and ultimately women will not care as much because it wasn’t a little girl in the shower. I hope he has some strong men in his life that will help him through this.
I find the argument interesting but ultimately I disagree. Abuse against girls and women is covered up, hidden, and largely ignored on a regular basis. Abuse against women is common to the point that it’s unsurprising and not shocking to people anymore. This kind of press is rarely lent to crimes against women and girls. The women are more likely to be accused of lying or “deserving it” or of doing something that caused the rape or abuse. If it had been a girl in the shower she’d probably have to defend herself against accusations of dressing provocatively and leading… Read more »
When rape by women against men isn’t even recognised as possible and rape by women against boys is barely recognised as wrong, I beg to differ. And if you haven’t noticed the kind of press generated when the institutional abuse of girls is covered up in this manner I’m not really sure what planet your newspapers come from. Show me an example of the mainstream press slut-shaming a victim of clergy abuse and your argument might begin to hold water. As for female victims of rape being accused of “deserving it” or “causing it” can you point out to me… Read more »
The linking of Child Sexual Abuse to Homosexuality is an issue that is fraught with peril. To many it is an old rotten chestnut that is itself abusive. It is no surprise that some religious types have attempted to capitalize on the PSU events and get it rolled out again. I have no doubt that they have been using pulpits all over the land to expound on it. In fact, it was not surprising that some sought media attention very quickly after the story broke. I did note that they failed to mention concern for any potential victims. Some would… Read more »
It’s hard to know which comment to respond to in this thread, but something in this one hits on the core issue that needs to be addressed, in ALL sexual assault and rape cases. That is that rape – of anybody at any age – is not about sex. It is a violent crime. It is about power and violence, and nothing else. Does it have sexual undercurrents? Only in that it weaponizes sexual body parts to become the vehicles of abuse and torture. But by mixing up with sex, we allow things like the gender and sexual orientation of… Read more »
Thanks for writing this, Alyssa. While I understand some of Toms points in this piece, his article uses “homosexual rape” as a descriptor, and the fact is that rape is not “gay” or “straight .”. Rape is not about sex, and to imply that it is is an injustice to the boys and girls and men and
Women and everyone in between who have been raped.
I wouldn’t be so sure. Different rapists rape for different reasons, sometimes its purely about sex and domination doesn’t enter into it.
I have to disagree here.
I’ve seen a lot of press coverage of Catholic priest sexual abuse of children, and it appears to be for both girls and boys. And cover-up seems to be in full force for both cases.
The cover-up for Penn State may have partially to do with some kind of “homo shame,” but ultimately the football program is seen by the school, its board, and its athletic department as the school’s pride and cash cow. So had it been a girl in the shower, would they have pressed charges? Doubtful. It’s all about the money.
I agree Tom, the fact that it was a little boy made it more possible to continue. It’s very sad that I’ve heard a lot of people say that they’d rather have a little boy than a girl because you don’t have to worry about boys. Really? That’s exactly what pedophiles are counting on.
Actually people would rather have girls because they are seen as better. You can look up the stats now because you can get gizmos for trying to fix the gender of your baby these days. Most people want girls.
Sorry, forgot to post the Frank Deford piece: http://www.npr.org/2011/11/16/142355144/is-football-culture-the-core-of-the-problem
Tom–your question made me think of this essay by Frank Deford who ponders, “Is Football Culture the Core of the Problem?” Of course, it is at the core along with any other hyper-masculine arenas that reinforce a manly facade while ignoring all other aspects of what it means to be a man. Obviously, though, it is not strictly limited to football as we know–Catholic priests don’t play football, do they? No, it is clear, as you say, that this behavior is so outside of the limits of what is even perceivable that “the homosexual nature of the crime revealed a… Read more »
Tom, I totally agree with this. The homosexual nature of the crime definitely contributed to how it was covered up and perpetuated, and psychologically, you are very much onto something. And let me state, again, unequivocally: Tom, you have hit the nail on the head! Everybody, listen up: I have AGREED with Tom. Everybody also hear this: I am sticking to the topic in the title of the article that asks, “What if it had been a girl in the shower?” So please, no accusations of changing the topic to “whataboutthewomenz.” I am answering Tom’s question. I am “on-topic.” If… Read more »
People may have asked, and the press may have asked, and bloggers may have written…
What had she been wearing? Was she slutty? Did she like older men? Did she have a “reputation?” Did she ask for it in some way? Did she like it? Had she done it before?
Those are things I think might also have happened if it had been a girl in the shower.
EXACTLY.
I agree. If it had been a 10-year-old girl in the shower, we would have eventually hear about how she came to be there. About how she was a real fangirl, just crazy about the team, the kind of girl who might’ve done anything to feel closer to them. There also would have been many dismayed cries of “Where was her mother, letting her hang around a place like that alone with grown men?” Because mothers (not so much fathers) are expected to keep their daughters in line, to keep them out of trouble. Boys are allowed their freedom, but… Read more »
Which is an excellent illustration of how boys are less valued than girls. Thanks for pointing it out.
Differently valued, come on.
Males are FAR less valued than females in our society.
I haven’t met Tom yet, so haven’t had the same opportunities to disagree with him! However, I do agree with Lori. Katha Pollitt and Fran Deford both pointed out this double standard how the gender of the victimized children modifies our cultural response. Either way, it ends up being the same thing if you consider the misogyny, and deep seated disdain for the feminine in all it’s manifestations, that informs the type of homophobia and hyper-masculinity that Tom describes.
“What was she wearing? Was she slutty? Did she like older men? Did she have a reputation? Did she ask for it? Did she like it? Has she done this before?” For Christ sake , on a 10 year old! What kind of sick people do you hang with!?!
“What was she wearing? Was she slutty? Did she like older men? Did she have a reputation? Did she ask for it? Did she like it? Has she done this before?” Asked of a ten year old? No, I don’t think so. Younger child victims of rape don’t tend to get those questions. An adolescant victim? Possibly. And I do agree, that a male victim would be less likely to have had those questions asked in that situation. But only because it was a homosexual encounter. In the few incidents of Woman-Boy paedophilia that see the light of day, its… Read more »