As an entrepreneur, I often find myself working too much, for too long, with too little time spent, taking that vital self-care of my basic needs.
What inevitably happens is, my incorrigible temperament begins to seep through and every few months, I find myself completely at odds with the world around me.
Why? Because I’ve begun subconsciously externalizing everything and it’s no wonder that my outer world begins to reflect the same, exacting polarity—that of my inward (and often awkward and denied) glance. It is an underrated sentiment that we ought to rest more and take that necessary time to just, be.
When you hunger, you chase after what can never be satiated. We chase after greed, long over what we lust and tirelessly pursue our image—that person we’ve convinced ourselves, we need to be. Over the past few years, I’ve taken that inward glance, to really see, just who I am, underneath my incorrigible needs.
How many relationships have I foregone, to pursue my dreams?
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No different than a child, there is a part of us, that requires such simple, basic needs. It only asks of us, for the simplest of deeds. “Feed me properly; let me sleep.” Are we granting that necessary space, for play, silliness and spontaneity? When is the last time we had a tear-jerking belly laugh, or were suddenly roused, by something totally unexpected—perhaps some synchronicity?
I realize, as many these days probably do, that I too often seek solace in the comfort of my enterprising desires, while ignoring my childlike pleas. When did so many of us forget how to take care of such simple, life-sustaining gestures that are absolute—lest we become old, long before our knees shake and become that which we thought we could evade, when life once felt like this is all such a breeze?
How many relationships have I foregone, to pursue my dreams?
When did I let life become my past and future, while escaping the present moment too often, chasing after such immaterial means? Even when those I love most, attempt to penetrate what so often appears as an impenetrable core, I can have a tendency to lash out, simply because of what they’re urging me to recognize, as those basic, self preservation needs—ignoring what is true, that loved ones should always come first, not to exclude this body, we’re here residing in—here performing such simple things.
It’s humbling to acknowledge that I have become too strung out once more, because it seems so necessary to be something in a world that doesn’t seem to value, just being. Growing up listening to folks who absent-mindedly believe that we must be something—this old, treacherous programming, threatening to dissolve whatever goodness, truly exists within me.
A dear friend has been warning me all week, ever so subtly and with well-intentioned grace, that I am working too much and that I need to listen to my body—what it is telling me, “Please, just rest.”
Alas, here I sit, drafting this article, because of my insatiable desire to write—to keep going, despite the looming crash and outward disgrace, I am at risk of letting loose, so haphazardly. So here’s to taking a weekend off, a burgeoning writer and entrepreneur, who rarely listens to others, with exception to the only one in this life, that undoubtedly matters the most—my lover and best friend, who cares more for me than I can fully comprehend here in this moment, but if there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s to trust in your counterpart’s insistence, that rest is your best friend—when that child within, seeks what should be, such a delightful reprieve.
Self-love equates to love of others and that same recognition of all else that really, truly matters …
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Words of advice from a fellow traveler, writer and entrepreneur: take better care, and go easy on yourself, my friend—there is no race, and only one finish line. That being said, this life is a journey, here and now, where all of the action, everafter, is taking place—evident, in the eyes of such pure innocence—that child within, which expresses to beseech. Be that witness, to your own life and health and remember that self-care is the basis or foundation to all else.
Self-love equates to love of others and that same recognition of all else that really, truly matters—a rich life consisting of simplicity, no longer exhausted—perpetually down on one knee.
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