A short but pertinent message this week. So kick back, grab your cup of man tea and check this out.
We’ve all heard this phrase: “Able to leap tall buildings in a single bound, faster than a speeding bullet, more powerful than a locomotive”.
Yes, it’s Superman, but have you got your sh*t together like Clark Kent on steroids? If not why not! How about a cup of ‘harden up’ then! Man up buddy!
How many times have I heard these types of messages! How many times have I berated myself, ending up even more entrenched in my illusory pursuit of what it means to ‘be the man’. Enough already.
With all the expectations of the world screaming at me, it can be loud out there, not to mention the noise in my own head. So enough of the macho shaming BS.
Some of you may even be thinking, ‘oh here we go with the namby pamby new age wimpy guy stuff’. Nope, not that either.
Being a man (in fact being a human), is a work in progress, and I’m quite ok with admitting that I don’t have all my sh*t together. But here’s the thing. The bits that I don’t, I own and am working on, and this is a different matter.
Whatever those ‘bits’ are for you… fears, insecurity, self doubt, lack of confidence, critical voices etc, your role as a man is not to shut these down or pretend that they don’t exist.
You don’t need to grab another crutch, punch another head, or make another million to prop yourself up. Instead, it’s time to embrace a self culture of courage, feel the fear, and face your own demons.
Look, there is certainly a place for standing strong, and living life with a firm grip of your own balls. But having your sh*t together and ‘manning up’, is not what makes you attractive, not what makes you successful, not what makes you who you are.
What makes you authentic and real, is owning your sh*t AND dealing with it. That’s what makes you a better man and increases your self worth. When you do that, the rest will follow.
As an aside, when two people do this together, they will build a bulletproof relationship.
F^*k the expectations of what other people say about how you should be, what you should look like, or how far you should have progressed by now.
Be it the media, your work colleagues, your Dad, your best mate, or self help gurus. At the end of the day, it’s you who has to sleep at night.
This is not to say don’t ever listen and take correction or feedback. There are certainly times for this, but YOU are the one you live with, and YOU are the navigator of your own life.
Neither is this about having a f^*k you attitude. Instead, it’s about having a f^*k yeah approach to life!
The Mac laptop that I wrote this on, was due to a man who had a f^*k yeah approach. He wanted to create and design the most functional, beautiful computers ever known. And so he did, even after losing his job at Apple.
So be kind, show love, own your sh*t, live your truth, revel in your uniqueness, follow your gut, because there is no other person like you on the planet.
God knows, the world needs men like this, kids need Dads like this, partners need lovers like this, and you owe it to yourself, to show up and be that man!
Join The Good Men Project Community
All levels get to view The Good Men Project site AD-FREE. The $50 Platinum Level is an ALL-ACCESS PASS—join as many groups and classes as you want for the entire year. The $25 Gold Level gives you access to any ONE Social Interest Group and ONE Class–and other benefits listed below the form. Or…for $12, join as a Bronze Member and support our mission, and have a great ad-free viewing experience.
Register New Account
Please note: If you are already a writer/contributor at The Good Men Project, log in here before registering. (Request a new password if needed).
ANNUAL PLATINUM membership ($50 per year) includes:
1. AN ALL ACCESS PASS — Join ANY and ALL of our weekly calls, Social Interest Groups, classes, workshops and private Facebook groups. We have at least one group phone call or online class every day of the week.
2. See the website with no ads when logged in!
3. MEMBER commenting badge.
ANNUAL GOLD membership ($25 per year) includes all the benefits above — but only ONE Weekly Social Interest Group and ONE class.
ANNUAL BRONZE membership ($12 per year) is great if you are not ready to join the full conversation but want to support our mission anyway. You’ll still get a BRONZE commenting badge, and you can pop into any of our weekly Friday Calls with the Publisher when you have time (Friday calls only). This is for people who believe—like we do—that this conversation about men and changing roles and goodness in the 21st century is one of the most important conversations you can have today.
We have pioneered the largest worldwide conversation about the changing roles of men in the 21st century. Your support of our work is inspiring and invaluable.
Photo credit: Shutterstock