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Read the moment you are standing in before you speak and be sure to understand the relevance to your speaking to the matter of the moment and speak within the breath of a pregnant pause.
Taking the moment to stop, listen and then respond could only savor the truth of the moment, but allows the moment to play itself out so you can see more of the story. When you know more of the story, your response can be a more accurate one.
The power of patience and awareness is a tool to be used when listening to the person you are conversing with. You can not hear them with compassion and love until you practice the art of listening.
One can never assume one hears another until you truly open your heart and ears because assuming you understand before actually listening only serves to make an ass out of you and me (ass-u-me).
When you speak in response it should be a moment before you speak, a moment of allowing the flavors of the conversation to sit within the caverns of your ears and travel to the chambers of your heart, then and only then can you respond in an aware manner. You can only be aware by listening to the communication being given. It is almost impossible to hear with closed ears.
In that moment of listening, you, as a listener, have a chance to honor the speaker and the conversation you are a part of. If you want to be heard and honored, you must open your ears and heart to receive the message coming to you. You must be in alignment of purpose. If your true purpose is to communicate, then you have to be willing to listen and empower the person speaking. If you only want to be heard, the balance of power of being understood becomes obscure and impossible to maintain.
To empower you have to allow. To empower you must be a mirror of what you may desire or want as a person. To empower, you must enable the person speaking as you want to be heard. To empower, you must attempt to understand the position of the person speaking. It does not mean you are in agreement. It means you are just willing to listen and be a mirror of respect.
The allowance does not mean you are in agreement. It only means you are willing to be present for the person and the conversation. It is not about winning the act of conversation, but being willing to be in the act and participate fully.
If a person is telling a story, you have to wait until the story has been told, in order to respond with a true sense of knowing. You cannot assume the ending of the story, even if you may have an idea.
I learned, as an older brother and father, to listen with compassionate ears in order to honor the learning process of my brothers and sisters, as I did and still do with my grown daughter. Because you make have an answer or know a pathway to travel, it does not mean you know all the ways to travel in order to achieve a goal or destination. I call it loving guidance. I allow their learning process to evolve. The most important factor is the continuance of their growing process. It is important to experience the answers through a personal journey, rather just being told. And, it is important for them to know they are supported in their individual personal journeys.
As an elder, my main purpose is to support with wisdom and patience. I have gained life experiences from living the answers while traveling on my life’s journey. I must allow those with less experience to enjoy their learning experience. I am there to guide their experience, not live it for them or talk over them which could only help to negate their experience.
I, as an elder, have more power because of my age and wisdom. But, in using that wisdom and power, I must be respectful of the process of empowerment of who I may be interacting with. We are on equal footage as human beings, Each of us has a voice to share and develop and each of us must learn the art of conversation and the acts of compassion in order to evolve and commune as human beings. Each of us must respect the sacredness of our positions in life and what we have to offer to the world. All stations of being are needed whether you be man, woman or child. These are all parts of the whole.
Each season must be greeted, accepted and nurtured as each experience of life should be. We must use our personal powers to enhance everyone’s journey. The key word is compassion and the key action is to listen and having allowance and acceptance of the story being given. There should be no competition, but a deeper sense of inclusion in a search of similarities of purpose.
When you practice the art of reading power, you learn to be present to hear, receive and then simply give back. No one is in charge because everyone is learning how to be of service to the other. That act is an act of being a community, an act of seeing and understanding the person you are speaking to.
If I am listening and feeling heard, I am more willing to stay present in the conversation. If I am listening to the story being revealed to me, I have a better chance of being present for the solution. I am able to read the palm of the hand, as well as hold. That is the power of the moment, a reading of love in action.
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This post is republished on Medium.
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Photo Credit: Shutterstock