I was discussing the power of positivity and perception with a friend today. These are themes the universe has been presenting regularly.
We have to stop being afraid of being a work in progress. When we talk about being positive, I don’t mean that you are BS positive, meaning…you aren’t addressing your emotions. But positivity stems from gratitude. That’s what it means to flip the script. You can’t be grateful without being positive. It’s not possible. The two are inextricably tied. So, if you can’t pump up your spirits, or see the benefits in your life and throughout your decisions, then you can’t find the gratitude.
Reading this post will not make you feel more positive and grateful. You have to willingly do the work. You don’t even get to half-ass it there. You need to 100% commit to deciding to see your gifts in life.
- I read about people who are so angry their lives have changed through illness.
- They are so angry at the way “life treats them.”
- They are angry at the angry person who lives in their house.
- They are angry they got passed over for a loan.
- Lost their dream house, their car. They are angry at deaths and losses.
Anger is rooted in fear and sadness. It is a defense mechanism people use to deflect hurt. I have spent this past year talking about this, and I cover it in my book and articles as well.
Is anger even an emotion?
We can separate anger and negativity. We can still feel regret at the turn of events, but we can be grateful for what we gained from it. And if you can’t see the silver lining, enough time and experience haven’t passed. Even deaths bring with them gifts; it might be as simple as having cherished the person for who they really are, for seeing them as a miracle you were fortunate enough to touch or know.
Sometimes, to find gratitude, we have to start small. I am grateful I woke up today. I am grateful for my spouse/SO, children, pets. I am grateful for the sunshine. I am grateful for this cool breeze. I am grateful for my good friends.
You won’t be thankful in every area of your life maybe but start in one area where you are, then work to make changes in the remaining areas.
If you look at your life, I am sure you will see there is plenty to be thankful for.
When someone tells you they appreciate you, believe them. When they are making attempts to change, encourage them. If you have been out of touch with them and you reunite or bump into each other, don’t assume they are the same.
Give people the benefit of the doubt. Good people don’t knowingly and deliberately hurt other people. If you have people like that in your life, show them the door.
The more that you defend your right to kind treatment, the more kindness will show up in your life. The more you will find it easier to dish it out. When you are surrounded by kindness and good treatment, the effect it has on your life is astounding! It changes your life. And here’s a secret…nothing else will change the state of your life, nothing else will make you more positive, but you. If you want what other people seem to have in their FB sanitized presentation, their apparent reality, then you have to do what you don’t want to. You have to do the opposite of what you long to do. You have to resist taking glee in their misery because it is feeding you the wrong ingredient and it is toxic, begetting more toxicity. You have to go against what might feel natural by now…to look on the dark side, to take joy in another’s pain.
It starts by stopping your behavior and changing it into a healthy and grateful habit. Get to work on your own life with joy, knowing you are building your own entirely unique creation. Let’s keep our sides of the street clean and be confident in our choices.
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Photo by Elizeu Dias on Unsplash