Ever had that one friend in sex-education class who was inclined to ask the most bizarre question, which actually turns out to be a myth? Well believe it or not, to this day we still question our own nature surrounding this topic, and that can mislead us into thinking we’re being safe. We’ve rounded up the questions surrounding safe sex, and decoded the ones you may not even have heard of. Taking them into the spotlight and showing them for what they really mean. Keep reading because you might be shocked to know you’ve been doing it wrong this whole time.
#1 — Planning sex ruins the mood.
Wrong! Planning can actually build the sexual tension and make things exciting for your partner. It is a great way to discuss your boundaries and discover new methods for you both to enjoy a more pleasurable experience. Maybe you can choose a theme of the night, or which gay men’s underwear you are going to put on to spice things up. It is always good to make sure you both want the same thing, and that you’re safe while doing it. Presides, nobody wants an unexpected, embarrassing experience while being naked with a partner. You get the point, communication is key.
#2 — You can tell by the way someone looks that they do or don’t have an STD.
Can you? I’m not sure anyone has some kind of sexual transmitted disease detector. Truth is you can never be 100% sure if someone does or doesn’t have one by just looking at them. Some STD’s can be treated for their symptoms; however for most, there is no cure. Someone you thought might be clean may indeed have an infection. So don’t take chances.
#3 — Adding extra lube stops the condom from breaking.
I can agree on some points, lube does make the experience a whole lot smoother. But I would advise against using anything with oil in it as this could potentially dissolve the condom. Substances you should steer clear of include baby oil, Vaseline, and hand cream. If your contraception breaks, you may find yourself in the pipeline for unwanted pregnancy, or make skin-to-skin contact with a pre-covered infected area.
#4 — Condoms ruin the feel of sex.
Not necessarily. We know that condoms protect you from sexual transmitted diseases and unwanted pregnancy, and using one should make you feel comfortable with yourself for that reason alone. Even people with latex allergies can use condoms made of polyurethane or latex-free, so that’s important to know.
But this doesn’t have to kill the mood. Condoms come in many different sizes, colours, flavours and textures. They are easy to get from a store, or from your local GP. To spice up your night you might want to try some of these flavors to choose from:
- Bubblegum Burst
- Fizzy Cola
- Tutti Frutti
That’s what I call a fruit salad of condoms.
#5 — Using two condoms is better protection.
You would think that using two condoms is safer than one, but in fact the friction from these rubbing together will warm them up, and further cause the particles to expand. Now I’m getting flashbacks to my science project—what happens to an object when it gets really hot? It expands, and will probably break. I wouldn’t try this. Instead you could take the option to wear a slightly thicker condom which has been proven to be the extra safe method of contraception by the NHS.
#6 — Lesbians don’t get STIs.
Whether you are gay, bisexual or straight, you could be prone to catching one. Safe sex should be practiced by everyone as there is no guarantee that you will always avoid it. There are specific protection techniques to use for females for example, wearing a layer of latex over the vagina during oral sex. When having sex women can optionally choose to wear a female condom which is designed to cover the whole vaginal area.
#7 — Taking the pill means I practice safe sex.
Just because a girl has taken a pill, doesn’t mean you’re protected. It just indicates that you have reduced the risk of unwanted pregnancy. Taking the pill after having unsafe sex will not protect you from this or catching an STI, and you should see a doctor as soon as possible.
#8 — Trying to re-use a condom.
I’m not sure why you would want to, but re-using a condom will actually increase the chances of catching a sexual transmitted disease. Condoms are designed to last once and re using will cause it to break quicker than a fresh condom.
#9 — You can’t catch a STD with oral sex.
False! You can defiantly catch something if there is skin-to-skin contact. However there are also safe options to take when having oral sex. You can use other methods including wearing condoms over the penis, placing a condom over dildos and other sex toys, or placing a sheet of latex over the female genitals.
#10 — Practicing safe sex implies that one of us has an STI.
I’d someone decides they want to have safe sex doesn’t mean they already have an STI, it could mean that they are unsure of the other person, and are protecting themselves. Either way, you should not be embarrassed or worried at this stage and make sure to always protect yourself, as well as others. Sometimes knowing want you want is a sexy trait, and I’m not spilling any secrets, but there’s more than one way to put on a condom.
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