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When I was younger, all I wanted was to be successful. That meant finding a way to excel in my career, make plenty of money, buy a huge home, drive a fancy car and only wear the finest clothing. I worked hard over the years and achieved many of my goals, but it wasn’t until I got married and had my first child that I began examining what it really meant to be successful.
Something I never realized when I was younger was how much I would grow and change throughout my life. They don’t really teach us that in school. If anything, we’re taught the opposite. As teenagers, we’re told to decide on a career path. We’re asked questions about what we want to do when we grow up and who we plan on being for the rest of our lives. How could a teenager possibly know such a thing?
After I had my first child, I knew everything had to change. I wasn’t just a man anymore. I was a father. Over the course of nine months, my life had become less about things and more about security, stability and freedom. I wanted free time to spend with my family, and I wanted to make sure I was healthy enough to enjoy that time for many years to come.
Maintaining a Successful Home Life: Finding the Balance
My marriage has always been important to me, but after our child was born, I knew it had to be the number-one priority. My spouse and I are a team, which means I need to find a healthy balance between work life and home life. This is a common challenge for dads. In 2015, half of all working fathers said that maintaining balance is difficult.
I used to put in as many hours in the office as possible to help ensure we had plenty of money for everything we needed, but now, my wife and I both agree that it’s just as valuable for me to be home.
I want my children to grow up knowing their father, so lately, I’ve been looking for ways to make the most of my time at home. Sometimes, that means working remotely from my living room while my children play on the floor nearby. Other times, it means taking an early afternoon or an extra three-day weekend each month. I used to always volunteer to work on holidays, but now, I make sure to spend that time making memories with my kids.
Succeeding in Health: Thriving with Physical Fitness
All the money in the world won’t make a difference if I’m in poor health and unable to have fun with my loved ones. Over the years, I’ve seen many of the guys in my office drive themselves into the ground due to making work the number-one priority. I want to be able to enjoy my retirement one day, and I want to see my children and grandchildren grow up, which means taking care of my body. Heart disease is the leading cause of death in American men. I can’t let that happen to me.
Thanks to a low carb diet and a challenging gym routine, I’m currently in pretty good shape. I feel great about myself, and my wife isn’t complaining about my new regimen either!
Finding Success: Discovering True Passions
I still care about my career, and I still have more dreams I want to achieve. However, my definition of success no longer revolves around my career and making money; it’s become more about making a difference than about making money. I want my work to mean something, and whether it’s through making innovative changes at the office, coming up with a new vision for my company’s future, or helping my kid learn how to walk or ride a bike, I plan for this world to be a better place after I’m gone.
Now, instead of measuring my success by the size of my paycheck, promotions, and bonuses, I measure my success by whether I am helping people and my company reaches their full potential. If what I do improves my life and the lives of those around me, that is success in my eyes. Having a kid helped me realize that my true passion is not being a workaholic; it’s being someone who improves the lives of others and makes a true difference in the world, no matter how small that difference may be.
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Photo by Naassom Azevedo on Unsplash