Zach Rosenberg’s ten favorite benefits of having a sexy marriage.
1. You’ll have more fun.
Maybe I’m peaking prematurely, so to speak, but having more sex in your relationship will make it more fun. If you are having it with a person you love and the both of you are being completely open and vulnerable, you will have fun, and this fun will spill over into your (clothed, boring) life.
2. You’ll be less likely to sweat the small stuff in life.
Sex releases endorphins, which are the body’s natural happy-juice. You get an immediate (and lasting) sense of euphoria, coupled with testosterone and oxytocin releases in men. Those hormones can help you feel less aggravated over all of the day’s little annoyances. Studies have also been done proving that people who have had sex will respond better to stress afterward like public speaking or solving math problems. And best of all, during and after sex, your pain threshold is increased, so if you stubbed your toe on the way to the bedroom or slammed your finger in your car door on the way to your date, you’re in luck!
Because obviously, if you’re having hot and wonderful sex, your lover will be getting all of those releases of wonderful hormones and associate a good feeling with being by your side (or under you, or on top of you).
4. You, too, will feel more bonded with your spouse.
If you’re having hot and wonderful sex, you too will be experiencing those hormones! Studies have been done showing that sex makes two people feel connected to each other more, and the opposite is true too—when two people feel connected, they experience better sex. And when you think about it, sex with your spouse is totally better than all that meaningless stuff you had in your younger years.
5. You’ll be more honest.
Because you both now feel more connected to each other, you’re more free to talk about the things that turn you on that you might not have told anyone else. Look, our desires are embarrassing sometimes, and just because you’re incredibly turned on by your partner doesn’t mean you can’t also be turned on by other looks, ideas and actions. So, make the bedroom a “safe” place to talk about what might turn you on that’s out of your ordinary. Try something your partner’s been thinking about, and tell him or her something you’d like to try. It’ll make things more exciting and break down those embarrassing walls. But remember, no judging! Just roll with it and enjoy yourself. It’ll probably end up being the best sex you’ve ever had.
6. You won’t ever have to hear comparisons to past lovers.
Fact: if you’re the gold standard, there’s no one you’ll lose out to in your spouse’s memories. So keep it hot and exciting! You’ll never have to hear about the time that so-and-so did blah blah blah if you’re the one delivering the most exciting experiences.
And the same goes for you. If you’ve mentioned former lovers to your partner in the past, they’ve taken notes. They’re trying to give you an experience that erases that last person from your mind because they want to be your one and only.
7. Your friends will be inspired.
People talk. Whether you’re having a night out with the guys and casually admit how fun your love life is, or whether your partner is gossiping about your shared experiences, people love a success story. If guys know their friend is having a particular kind of hot, sweaty sex that they’re not having…well, they want to “join the club.”
But you don’t want to tell everything, because…
8. You’ll have fun secrets with your spouse.
Okay, so not everything you do in the bedroom is totally stuff you want your friends to know you do. Hey man, that’s cool. It’s good to have secrets! You spend your whole day yammering on about things and being social. And if you’re a parent of a young kid, even moreso—you probably also have to go to the bathroom and shower with the door open. Isn’t it nice to have ONE thing that you can do late at night in private?
9. You will be physically healthier.
Sex does like a hundred awesome things, including improving your cholesterol and blood pressure because of the cardio workout. You can also expect a nice calorie-burn from your bedroom work-out. But did you know that orgasms reduce the risk of prostate cancer in males? Sex also helps to boost your immunity and antibodies, which leads to fewer colds and flus.
10. Sex begets sex.
Once you start having really good, honest, exciting sex, you’re bound to have more. Maybe it’s the oxytocin, maybe it’s the connection you two are feeling, but when you hit that level, it’s hard to stop yourselves. Like a big sex snowball. But not necessarily involving an actual snowball… Unless you’re into that sort of thing.
Photo: Flickr/Son of Groucho