It is a sign of the times that divorce continues to be at the highest rates ever. Some perceive this as a bad thing, as the end of a long-term relationship can leave a person feeling alone and discouraged. But, like every life challenge that crosses each path, the end of one love can lead to the beginning of an even fuller and more fulfilling relationship.
It all depends on how you view love
People over fifty have discovered the days are over when lust at first site was used to determine a suitable partner. Lust alone does not last. Once the romance bliss bubble burst, you are left with the essence of the person lying next to you. You might have missed this while you were busily trying to get them in bed. This is when you may discover you don’t like that person very much.
Although some of us at this age have not tried another method to look for a new partner because we have been in a long-term relationship, we are instinctively aware this alone doesn’t cut it anymore.
I am not saying that sexual attraction is not important as you get older, it definitely still important to me, but our definition of love changes. This is not because we have become too stubborn and set in our ways; it is that we have become less tolerant of the things we are certain another cannot change. Good sex alone is not enough to put lipstick on that pig and make it tolerable anymore.
There is another factor, this has to do with the fact we learn to love ourselves better as we get older. We know a relationship will not work unless two partners can enthusiastically and respectfully support each other in their own evolution without restriction. This is a big change from where many of us started when we found our first romantic partners.
The make-up of a partnership has changed
It is not just our definition of love that has transformed, the formula for romantic unions has also changed. A large percentage of people over fifty don’t see the need to get married as part of a committed relationship. For example, many couples don’t see a need to live together in the same house, city, state or even country. There is no formula, the two people involved will have to figure out the best way for them, and that is fine.
Bottom line is this, if you are still looking for that hot woman/man to fulfill your sexual fantasies and fill your life with romance for perpetuity, then I think the answer is no, you will not find true love after fifty. if you are still relying on sex appeal as your main feature, then you are probably not going to attract the type of partner that can contribute to a fulfilling relationship.
However, if you can be open-minded, optimistic, flexible and accept new dimensions of love that go past the physical, you may find a love that goes beyond sex and romance and helps you form a union with another’s body, mind and soul. If this is you, then the answer is yes. There will be some trials, and you will have to be patient, but you will find the greatest love of your life with a partner who fully cherishes you and you them.
Remember, paying gratitude for life forward will fill joy with joy and serenity.
Previously published here and reprinted with the author’s permission.
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