Dear Sexes: I’m dating this guy who has to always be moving me around during sex. It starts out all romantic, face to face, but within minutes he’s got me on my back, then my side, doggie style. It never ends! What is this about?
She Said: Yes! WHY do some men have to do this? They’re tossing you around, and you’re looking for a hidden camera or small studio audience, because it seems like a performance and it’s definitely not for my entertainment… Up on the knees, down on your belly, on your side, one leg up by your ear, he gets on top and the next thing you know he’s perpendicular to you and your right leg is losing sensation.
Men: Don’t do this. Most of us don’t like it! One or two position changes are fine, but stick to the ones that get you a good reaction. If you hear a moan or a squeal or a “YES!” then stay there, do that, keep doing that! If she goes quiet and looks bored, then switch it up -but slowly, gently, and find that moan spot again. Or here’s a nutty idea: ask her what she’d like!
He Said: Does your boyfriend sample 15 flavors of ice-cream in one outing, or is he only so indecisive/experimental/a.d.h.d in the bedroom? If this behavior only happens in the bedroom, he’s under the influence…. of porn. It happens. He’s a guy. He’s aesthetic oriented, and probably just trying to reenact his favorite moves from the internet with his favorite gal in real life!
His heart’s in the right place, even if his penis is not. Don’t be afraid to try new things, but don’t feel obligated either. Do what feels good for both of you. You can always beat him to the punch, and steer him into YOUR favorite positions. And remember, you’re allowed to research too!
Originally appeared at SheSaidHeSaid.