A man wonders why a husband’s advice isn’t worth anything to his wife.
Dear Sexes: Why would women rather listen to the village idiot for the answer to a question rather than their husband? Example: My father was one of the smartest people I’ve ever met. He would tell my mother something, and she wouldn’t believe it. When one of her friends (who was pretty much nuts) would give the same answer, THEN she would believe it. Maddening.
She Said: It isn’t that we don’t trust your opinion, it’s that we don’t trust any one person’s opinion. No doubt your mom thought your dad was smart, but before she made a decision, she wanted to weigh everyone’s opinions as well. She was well-rounded! So try not to see your girl’s interest in others’ opinions as a slight to you, try to see it as just another way women are different from men. And more balanced (just kidding!).
I don’t know if it’s biology or society, but for some reason women seem to be much more “members of the village” than men. There are, of course, exceptions to this, but in general it is the wife who has the big network of friends and who maintains the relationships. We tend to be the ones who develop a community around our families. This is a really valuable trait, especially when you have kids, because as they say, “it takes a village…” and your wife is probably going to be the one who creates that village for your kids, just as I bet your mom created that for you.
He Said: When you’re driving and you get lost, do you ask your wife/girlfriend/female friend for directions, since she’s the one who’s been diligently studying the map for an entire hour? Do you ask the man working at the gas-station? I think we know the answers to these questions.
Seriously though, women believe (or sometimes try to believe) they’re the smarter gender. I’m still undecided about whether they’re right or wrong, however the fact remains: women often prefer to listen to the village idiot, as opposed to their husband, because the village idiot is just as good a bet (if not better) to be helpful. Perhaps some women view their man as the village idiot, and the actual village idiot as an unbiased source of possibly helpful advice. To be blunt, how can I answer this question? I’m just a guy! I don’t know what I’m talking about. And even if I do, your wife/girlfriend/female friends wouldn’t believe me anyway.
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Originally appeared at SheSaidHeSaid.
—Photo Perfecto Insecto/Flickr