Yes, the Browns won Sunday. Still, Patrick Wensink questions the trade that sent Trent Richardson to the Colts and wonders what other swaps the hapless franchise is considering.
Last week, the Cleveland Browns surprised everyone but their fans by naming third string quarterback, Bryan Hoyer, Sunday’s starter and then trading last year’s first round draft pick, Trent Richardson, to the Indianapolis Colts in exchange for a 2014 first round pick. This was little shock to the beleaguered Cleveland fanbase, as it now, after 13 years of ineptness, expects a game of one-upmanship amongst the team’s successive front offices, 6 in all since 1999, to make an even bigger mess of the team than the previous administration.
From passing up Donovan McNabb for Tim Couch, to declaring Brady Quinn the answer, to the fire sale for playmakers like Kellen Winslow and Braylon Edwards after a rare winning season, the Browns have earned a PhD in boneheaded management since returning to the NFL. Like a wounded lover who never properly healed after being dumped in high school, the Browns promise to rebuild every season, only to dig themselves into a deeper pit.
Of all the head-scratching pits dug, none will linger like the moves made on September 18, 2013. While the Richardson trade is dominating headlines, it is not, however, the only bold move CEO Joe Banner and general manager Mike Lombardi are considering;
1. Trading The Color Orange to Tampa Bay for a decent lawnmower and tickets to Cats.
2. Trading Paul Kruger to New Line Cinema for Freddy Kruger.
3. Trading unofficial mascot John “Big Dawg” Thompson to the Toronto Argonauts for 60 gallons of maple syrup.
4. Trading radio analyst Bernie Kosar to Texas A&M for Johnny Manziel autographs.
5. Trading 1955 championship trophy to Houston Texans for a first down.
6. Trading backup QB Jason Campbell to Fox Sports South for color commentator Tim Couch. (After all, they already drafted him once.)
7. Trading All Pro Tackle Joe Thomas to Seattle for anyone on the coaching staff with grey hair who can do a Pete Carroll impression.
8. Trading Joe Haden to Arizona for a family pass to the Grand Canyon.
9. Trading remainder of pride and optimism to Baltimore for one night of snuggling with Ozzie Newsome for old time’s sake.
10. Trading season ticket holders’ trust for Teddy Bridgewater.
Photo: AP/Gail Burton