.
.
So you think ghosting is confusing? What about the guys who go even further and become full-time zombies?
If you’ve seen guys who disappear after a few dates and then come back after months wanting to feast on your attention, you might have been visited by the dating undead…
Transcript provided by YouTube:
00:00
[Music]
00:03
hi matthew and stephen thank you for all
00:05
your work i’m dating in my early 40s
00:07
after long marriage and i found it very
00:08
helpful in navigating this new terrain
00:12
my question is why do men become zombies
00:16
i sometimes meet a guy i have a great
00:18
time with we date for a week a few
00:20
months
00:20
then it ends and we don’t message your
00:22
talk anymore sometimes for months and
00:24
months
00:24
then suddenly there’s a message in your
00:26
dms and they’re back
00:28
like hey how you doing or i appreciate
00:31
the time we had
00:32
just when you think you moved on and
00:34
have buried them in the past of lost
00:35
lovers they return
00:37
from the dead i’d love to understand why
00:39
from the male perspective
00:42
so the reason that someone will
00:45
typically
00:46
reappear in your life is because there
00:48
is a void in their own
00:51
so they’ll come back in to get some
00:55
attention
00:56
typically perhaps to check if you’re
00:59
still there
01:00
there’s something comforting isn’t there
01:02
about the pro
01:03
the state of being single but knowing
01:07
that other people that you’ve had flings
01:09
with are also
01:10
still single you know i don’t
01:14
want you but i also don’t want you
01:18
to be in a different state i don’t want
01:20
you to be in a relationship
01:22
do you still belong to the ocean that
01:24
i’m in
01:26
and so people message that person just
01:28
to check that they’re still around
01:30
get a bit wistful a bit of a bit of the
01:33
old
01:34
saudarde is that how you say it steve
01:36
the sawdud
01:38
the wistful melancholy of things
01:41
past and you know the you know getting
01:44
sentimental about things we’re all
01:46
capable of getting sentimental about
01:47
things
01:48
even if they weren’t right for us you
01:50
can still want to go back to someone and
01:52
just have a little moment of connection
01:54
a little
01:55
a little hit of the past a little hit of
01:58
joy
01:59
of you know oh we did have a thing we
02:01
did have a good thing didn’t we you
02:02
could have positive memories of
02:03
something that you didn’t want to hold
02:05
on to but in your mind it’s still a very
02:07
positive memory
02:08
and so you you check in to get a little
02:09
hit of that
02:11
it’s like watching an old christmas
02:12
movie you don’t want to watch it every
02:13
day
02:15
you don’t want to watch in february but
02:18
christmas rolls around again and you
02:20
crack out elf
02:23
in the wake of a global pandemic zombies
02:26
are quite likely to appear
02:28
and we have just faced a global pandemic
02:32
right it’s kind of prime zombie season
02:35
for people to sort of
02:37
you know come lurking and be like oh i’m
02:39
lonely
02:41
let me feast on your brain
02:44
i think you’ve got a bit literal with
02:46
the terminology there
02:48
but yes feast on something
02:52
idea for a zombie film zomcom matt 28
02:54
dates later
02:57
28 dates later is actually pretty good
02:59
thank you
03:01
yeah sold go and you know you’re in l.a
03:04
go and
03:05
go and sell that poltergei
03:09
oh well yeah
03:12
that’s not bad you that’s not bad polk’s
03:16
a guy
03:17
poltergeist poltergeist the little girl
03:20
going he’s back
03:22
[Laughter]
03:27
podcast matthewhasey.com email in and
03:30
send us your best what did you call it a
03:34
uh rom horror con
03:38
akin to pole to guys or 28 dates later
03:43
yeah i love that
03:46
[Music]
04:04
you
—
This post was previously published on YouTube.
***
If you believe in the work we are doing here at The Good Men Project and want a deeper connection with our community, please join us as a Premium Member today.
Premium Members get to view The Good Men Project with NO ADS. Need more info? A complete list of benefits is here.
—
Photo credit: Screenshot from video