Some time it is really weird how human relationship works ?
People around you gets more attracted towards you if you are getting attention from other crowds. It’s a game of social proof.
It’s happened to me more than once with my wife.
I remember this one time, we were at a wedding.
You know how these things go, same old crowd, nothing special. I was chatting with an old friend — just catching up, no big deal.
…
But out of the corner of my eye, I could see my wife watching me. Her look was different, like she was seeing me in a new light.
Afterwards through out the day, she was more drawn to me. She was more affectionate than normal.
Nothing about me had changed — I was the same person. But I was considered more attractive just because few started a conversation with me and which drew more to join the conversation.
…
Another time, an ex of mine liked a photo on Facebook. Just a simple like, but boy, my wife didn’t miss it.
I noticed her being a bit more… attentive.
Like she was marking her territory or something. It’s weird, but psychologists have a name for this: “mate choice copying.”
Basically, when we see someone else valuing our partner, it makes us value them more too.
It’s like this social proof thing — if someone else thinks you’re great, your partner remembers that you’re pretty great too.
It’s like a little reminder. But here’s the deal — while that attention from others can be flattering, it shouldn’t be what keeps your relationship going.
There’s a real danger in letting outside attention dictate how we feel about our partners.
Like, if you’re always needing someone else to show interest before you realize what you’ve got, you might be in trouble.
The real value in a relationship comes from what’s between the two of you — not what others think.
So, yeah, next time your partner seems to be more into you just because someone else is, take it as a hint. But don’t let it be the only thing. Focus on what you’ve built together.
That’s where the real deal is — not in the passing interest of someone else.
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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From The Good Men Project on Medium
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Photo credit: Vlad Shalaginov on Unsplash
