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Men are often reluctant to talk about their needs in intimate relationships.
Whether social conditioning or an inability to communicate our needs are to blame, men (who tend to be the less communicative partners in intimate relationships) are prone to silently suffering when their emotional needs aren’t being met by their partners.
Whether you are a man or a woman reading this article, this will give you greater clarity into yourself/partner and what your/their needs are in your intimate relationship.
Let’s put an end to the needless fighting due to miscommunication, the unnecessary sex-less nights, and the verbal shut-downs.
Read through these tips and I promise you’ll never see your relationship through the same lens again.
Here are seven things men want in a relationship.
1. Praise And Approval
Men have infamously tender egos.
We like frequent reassurance about ourselves, our career paths, our efficacy as partners, our sexual prowess, and our attractiveness (among other things).
I have countless male clients telling me every month that their partners rarely let them know what they like about them.
While it may be true that men need relatively less frequent verbal praise than their female counterparts, this isn’t the kind of gesture that requires keeping score. Why not just have more of a good thing?
So ladies, let your praise loose. Tell your man exactly what you find attractive about him. Let him know what physical features of his are your favourites. Tell him how attractive you find it when he says something a certain way, when he accomplishes something, or when he takes you on a date. Your praise won’t make him cocky; it will help him feel loved.
And (bonus) the more you praise his positives, the more you will see them.
Men feel respect as love.
If he feels like you disapprove of him, his career, or the things that he believes to be integral to who he is as a person, he will have a hard time trusting and loving you.
The thought process behind that being “If she doesn’t respect who I am at my core, then how can she really want what is best for me?”
If a man’s partner doesn’t respect his path or mission in life, then he will find it very difficult to feel anything other than an anxious need to distance himself from her.
3. A Sense Of Sexual Connection
Men and women both connect through sex and communication, but generally, women connect better through verbal communication and men connect better through sex.
Does this mean that men need to have sex with their intimate partners every day in order to feel connected? Not at all.
Men, more often than not, connect through indicators of sexuality just as much as they do through sex.
Allow me to explain…
Often, a man will initiate sex just to make sure that you are still sexually available to him. So, to my man-loving readers out there, if he reaches across the bed for you, even showing the willingness to embrace him, to kiss him deeply, and to engage him could be enough to make him feel loved (not that the follow through isn’t enjoyable).
This lack of awareness around women needing to connect through words and men needing to connect through sex can sometimes turn into an unfortunate and rapid downward spiral. She doesn’t feel like opening sexually until she feels connected to him, but he finds it difficult to communicate with her because they haven’t been physical with each other in days.
Talk with your partner and ask what specifically helps them feel the most loved so you can avoid these unintentional standoffs.
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