Men Are Morons, Says the Super Bowl

Eminem and dumb men. Those seemed to be the two themes of the Super Bowl’s commercial lineup. Eminem popped up in every other commercial—claymation or human, it didn’t matter. But when he wasn’t selling us Brisk, telling us why he doesn’t do commercials, or actually making a really compelling argument for the future of Detroit, we saw guys bumbling and stumbling—yes, I just quoted Chris Berman—across life in every way imaginable.

They failed under pressure.

They stuck to the couch eating junk food.
Sex … sex … sex … where was I?
They told terrible stories.
They were outwitted by dogs.

They were, um, really, really, really weird.

They were slaves to technology.
And they couldn’t feed themselves.

Oh, wait. Sorry, that last one wasn’t a commercial. It actually happened. All in all, Super Bowl XLV’s commercial slate was a big loss for dudes. But there was one commercial that almost made the rest of them bearable. Thank you, Volkswagen.

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About Ryan O'Hanlon

Ryan O'Hanlon is the managing editor of the Good Men Project. He used to play soccer and go to college. He's still trying to get over it. You can follow him on Twitter @rwohan.

Comments

  1. 1) If you needed further proof that A-Rod is the worst, this was it.
    2) That Vader commercial was the best of the night.

    But I think you’re off on the other commercials. I really liked most of the ones you listed above. The one where his grandfather comes back to life was hilarious, as was the mistaken e-mail commercial. C’mon, who hasn’t mistakenly hit “reply all.”

    If you want to hate on something, it should be that atrocity of a halftime show. Fergie needs to go far, far away. Stat!

  2. I too was sorely disappointed by the commercials (in fact–I’ll stretch that to all things Super Bowl. The game had its moments, but was actually pretty sloppy, and yes, @DaddyFiles, that halftime show was in serious danger of wardrobe malfunction–only this time, I was afraid those blinking suits would electrocute, not undress, the wearers).

    However, I would say that men-as-idiots was only the sub-theme. The real tragedy was–big surprise–the incredibly sexist focus. You expect (but never condone) this from GoDaddy, but Sealy Mattresses? I cringed at almost every single commercial due to its blockhead stereotypes. What really gets me is that I’m having a decades-old reaction to this, and I almost feel cliche saying anything about it. But, when I have to apologize to my wife at every commercial break, it makes me wonder if sex will ever stop being used to sell cars, beer (Adrian Brody picking Stella over humans?). It doesn’t matter how long many of us have been upset about this. When it’s time to spend the most money on a commercial that companies will spend all year, they still default to paying millions for a leggy blonde.

    Oh: and even though E*Trade’s lost their mojo, I still can’t not laugh at a sneezing cat.

  3. Guys are dumb, girls are bitches. Yep, that was one of the dominant messages. What I don’t get is how people can’t see that misogyny hurts men & women both. & how people will just sit back & let commercials insult them. Aren’t the viewers supposed to be the ones buying your crap?

  4. I agree! I swear if this keeps up, I’m going to ban my three boys from watching the game. Either the girls are ho’s or the guys are complete morons. I swear this viewpoint of men being idiots is spreading and becoming more prevalent. Ridiculous.

Trackbacks

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