Doyin Richards offers practical advice to new dads in four major areas
—
Father’s Day is approaching and there are lot of pieces out there geared towards the men responsible for raising our children (obviously). But what about the new dad? I’ve only been a dad for four years so I definitely can’t say that I have all of the answers about fatherhood. But if I could offer some quick-hitting advice to new dads in four major areas, this would be it.
Social life:
1) Enjoy life when you want, and don’t be a slave to the schedule of your children.
2) Find friends with children at the similar age of yours. It makes socializing much easier because they know your challenges.
3) Be careful of who you choose to be friends with. They may have been fun to hang out with before kids, but now you have to ask yourself, “Do I want him/her to influence my children?” If the answer is no, you’ll probably need to make some difficult decisions.
Love/Relationship
1) Have a regular date night. No child has ever suffered because his/her parents took care their relationship.
2) Be affectionate around your kids. It’s important that they learn what true love looks like.
3) If you’re single, be sure to show your kids what it’s like to take care of yourself. You can’t be the best parent you can be unless you get some “you” time.
Career/Work
1) Don’t bring work drama home with you. Kids don’t understand any of that. They only want you to be an involved parent. Besides, I’m sure most offices aren’t okay with employees bringing their home drama to work – so the opposite should apply as well.
2) Don’t make your work in the office be more important than your work at home. You’ll never remember your first conference call or performance review, but you’ll remember your child’s first words and steps.
3) Set boundaries at the office. Let your boss know that you’ll work your tail off while you’re there, but staying late on a consistent basis is not an option. He/she will understand if you bring the results.
Raising The Child:
1) Be okay with not having all of the answers. Lean on friends and family to help.
2) Don’t rely on the Internet to raise your kids. Stop reading all of the “studies” telling us what to do or not do when it comes to being a parent. Trust your gut and don’t second guess yourself. You’ll make mistakes, but parenting is all about making mistakes and learning from them.
3) Stop rushing and slow down. Enjoy every moment you have with your kids. It goes by way too quickly.
4) Piggybacking on point #3, take LOTS of photos and videos. The parent who says, “Man, I wish I didn’t take so many photos of my kids” doesn’t exist.
***
This article originally appeared on daddydoinwork.com
Photo courtesy of bigstockphoto.com