10 Lessons From 10 Years of Approaching Women On The Street

It was 2013. I hadn’t been on a date in over a year. I was desperate. I was lonely.

So, when I typed “how to get girls” into Google and discovered the idea of approaching women in daytime venues, I was ready to give it a shot.

It’s been around 10 years since I began learning the art of ‘daygame’ — and it has now become my main source of attracting beautiful women.

Here are the 10 key lessons I learned from the last decade of flirting with women sober in daytime venues.

1. It’s possible

Before I tried it, the idea of approaching women in the daytime and making meaningful connections seemed impossible.

In reality, it could be achieved in 3 simple steps.

Approach and make it clear what you want.
Get to know each other.
Swap contact details with the intention of meeting for a date.

I’ve written about these steps in more detail here.

But I want to emphasize that an average man can land dates with women he meets on the street. These three steps also work well in shopping malls, parks, cafes, beaches and more.

I was a beacon of mediocrity when I started and was still able to attract amazing women into my life.

2. You’ll improve with practice

Seducing women is a skill that can be improved over time. The key is to practice often, identify your mistakes and work on them.

Don’t be that guy who tries the same approach, fails repeatedly then gives up. Find a coach or an experienced wingman who can identify your sticking points.

3. Social momentum is a superpower

It’s not just increased knowledge that’ll improve your approaches. When you build momentum by approaching women often, you begin to lose your inhibitions and your confidence skyrockets. It’s like you’re drunk without being drunk. Once I learned how to access this ‘flow state’, I quit drinking for good.

4. Daygame makes one hell of an emotional impact

Many women will be dazzled by the confidence you show by approaching her during the day. I would have many women mention their pleasant shock days later while we’re on the first date. Daygame lets you make an emotional impact that isn’t possible online.

5. Nobody cares

The fear of what other people think holds so many people back. When you practice daygame for long enough, you’ll lose this fear as it’ll become clear that no-one really cares what you’re doing with your life. In 10 years of approaching women in public, I’ve had one person interrupt me. Most people will look for two seconds then go back to their own lives.

6. Most of your excuses are BS

Learning daygame is essentially a series of making excuses why a certain approach won’t work, doing it anyway then realizing you were wrong. If you find yourself believing a reason why you shouldn’t approach a woman, tell yourself “let’s find out”, then try it anyway.

7. Daygame numbs you to rejection

Eventually, you’ll realize most rejections aren’t about you. They’re either about her (she’s busy, has a boyfriend etc) or they’re about your approach. Focus on improving what you can control and you’ll soon become numb to rejections.

8. Instagram is a must-have in 2023

In many cases, you’ll only have a few minutes to talk to the women you approach in daytime environments. When I first started approaching women in 2013, I found these short interactions rarely led to dates. But now we have Instagram! If you swap Instagram details, a woman can learn more about you and be excited to meet for a date, even if she only met you for five minutes. Here’s my guide on building an attractive profile.

9. A lot of women are spontaneous

I was taught to screen every woman I approached to see if she was available for an instant-date. Many women who are available will join you for a quick tea or coffee. This is the best way to build a lasting connection. In some cases, you may end up spending the whole day and night together.

10. Daygame is the best confidence-builder

There’s no other skill to help build your social confidence in any walk of life. If I hadn’t mastered daygame, I never would have had the balls to quit my job and travel the world solo seducing women of every culture, yet here we are!

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My new book ‘Offline Dating’ outlines tried-and-tested steps to attracting women in any daytime scenario. You can consider it your ultimate guide to meeting women in the real world. Click here or watch the video below to learn more.

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This post was previously published on medium.com.

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