There is something about a lava lamp that’s intriguing. It’s very abstract and impossible to predict a pattern. There is a nice cycle of life in a lava lamp. The lava grows, it reaches new heights, then it breaks up. It falls back to the bottom before growing again. These are things I think about.
Have you seen anything more unpredictable than the burst of color and shape bubbling around a lava lamp? How much does this have in common with the journey we are all on? I couldn’t predict the years and experiences preceding this moment. I don’t even want to begin trying to anticipate what will come next.
I really am learning to just enjoy what is here right now, while appreciating the colors and the shape as I am confident it will change. Ultimately, it will change for the better, and a new more vibrant version will be on display.
We begin this whole journey small and powerless. As we grow and expand, we begin to take new shape and form. Eventually, we reach a point where the current growth cycle no longer suits us, or has provided all it can produce. We reach the point where change is either necessary or forced by circumstance. Consider this the falling down to the bottom, only to grow once again, and take a new shape.
This process happens throughout all phases of our lives. I see this now through the eyes of my children. First it was learning to crawl, then learning to walk. Life was big and grand, each time with newfound wonder. Learning to talk added yet another layer, somehow, every phase became a brave new world.
There really is no difference as we move through this thing called life; the teenage years, followed by our twenties. For some this means college, others more life life experience. Marriage, careers, maybe divorce. Fill in the list as it pertains to your story. All of these cycles can be identified as we reach once more for a final crescendo.
Relationships take on this cycle of life too. We have the initial collision and the growth begins. Sometimes this growth is slow and organic, taking time to collect and take shape. Other times the growth can be quick and forced, nevertheless something forms and reaches the crucial point of needing to fall back to the bottom. Sometimes relationships just expire altogether, and the light goes out. There will always be a rebirth. It may take some time, but something new is on the way.
This is simply the manner in which we move through phases. The pieces fall to the bottom, losing what is no longer needed, picking up the new to morph into something with a slightly different shape. Each new phase has remnants from what once was there. But it takes on a life of its own as it grows and reaches new heights. Some of the pieces need to remain at the bottom, as we no longer need them to begin again.
I remember hearing for the very first time about the need to let go or say goodbye to versions of ourselves. Sometimes we need to mourn the very person we know too well. The person who has to take on a new role and leave another behind. This was something I never even considered; even though I had been through the process several times. Giving it thought helped me find closure to these people I knew, but never really had the ability to release.
Losing loved ones is no different. Our lives change and while at a glance, the same person exists, someone new has formed. Me with my dad on this planet was a different person than the one sitting here without him.
Friends come and go, there is a constant evolution of each relationship. Some relationships will stand the test of time, others will only be a grain of sand. It all depends on what we need at the time. Will they simply be present in order to reflect back to ourselves? Will they teach us something? Will they support us or set something into motion?
The cycle is never ending until we remove the plug from the wall, ensuring no more growth will happen. We begin as individuals and stretch and grow into something new over time; brothers or sisters, mothers or fathers, then grandparents. We are business partners and leaders of men or women. All the while letting go, but gaining speed and the ability to reach again, forming something new.
Originally Published on the Shft Blog.