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How thick does your skin have to be to stand there and listen to players, coaches and sometimes a stadium full of fans telling you exactly how unpleasant they think you are?
The people that do this twenty+ weeks per year are supposed to be strong, tough men. They’re the stereotypical manly men. The guys who aren’t afraid to stand in the face of a guy twice his size who makes thirty or forty times the money the official is bringing home, and making a call that you know is going to make that player go berserk.
They just stand there, staring forward and let it all roll of their back. “Like a Boss” is how I believe the kids say it these days. Or maybe that was yesterday. Either way it fits.
I’m not a stud, but I’m not a wimp ether. I played recreational ice hockey for almost twenty-five years and stand 6 ft, have broad shoulders, decent upper body strength and crazy leg strength to go along with a nice hockey booty.
All that and I’m not afraid to say that I don’t want that NFL officials job. No way.
But Sarah Thomas does.
As she’s done several times in her life, Thomas will be experiencing a “first” in her life today. Possibly the biggest first in her personal and professional life.
While playing adult recreational ice hockey, we had several female referees and the disgusting comments that came out of the mouths of some players regarding their sexuality and gender made me ashamed to be a male.
If this happened at the recreational level, imagine the abuse that gets dished out to Thomas by players making millions of dollars and expecting to look good so they can get that next fat contract.
I don’t even want to imagine.
Here at Good Men Project, we’re all about breaking traditional male stereotypes and encouraging men to be themselves and to embrace what it means to be a man in the 21st Century. But that got me to thinking.
Are men the only ones who can break masculine stereotypes?
No. They’re not. Just in the world of sports we have several women who have succeeded where men are simply assumed to be the ones getting the job.
Becky Hammon became the first NBA assistant coach when the San Antonio Spurs hired her in 2014. Kathryn Smith became a Buffalo Bills special quality control coach in 2016.
But this weekend the world will watch a multibillion-dollar league with billion dollar owners and million dollar players take the field in Foxboro, MA at 1:05 pm Eastern. Along with these millionaires will be a woman living her dream as she steps onto the biggest stage of a career that started in Conference USA back in 2007.
This may not seem like such a big deal to you, but the reality is that professional sports is America in a man’s world and God forbid a woman invades it. The NFL protects itself like no other empire. I call it an empire because that’s what it is.
It’s an empire to celebrate manliness and masculinity. Of physicality and force against other men. It’s brutality at its viewing finest along with head trauma, dementia, ALS and early death for many involved.
So the fact that Sarah Thomas will wake up this morning, make her way to Gillette Stadium, pull her No. 53 jersey over her head and make her way out to a ravenous crowd ready to watch their New England take on the Los Angeles Chargers for the right to face the Kansas City Chiefs in the AFC Championship game next weekend is a huge deal.
There will be no champagne spraying around the official’s locker room after the game. No one will be publically celebrating this achievement, but it’s a major achievement just the same.
Sarah Thomas broke one masculine stereotype when the NFL hired her full-time in 2015 and she’s breaking another as they assign her to a game with serious implications.
Of the approximately 66,829 sitting or standing inside Gillette only a handful will probably realize that a woman is helping officiate the game and that’s probably how Thomas wants it.
Breaking stereotypes doesn’t have to be showy. We don’t have to laud the NFL for what they did, but thanking them for hiring the best person for the job regardless of sex, race or color sure goes a long way.
The NFL still has a long way to go in breaking stereotypes but today they took a major step forward and for that, I say thank you.
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