Bruce Pagano is a devout Christian with strong principles. He respects those of his faith with whom he may disagree. He has a tough time, however, with those who deal in complete falsehoods. That is what he sees in today’s current discourse. He tells us why.
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If you had to explain it to someone from another country, what would you tell them appears to be the biggest issues facing our country? Our economy? The millions of people who live in poverty? Our hard broken justice system? The fact that a crazy misogynist has grabbed the GOP nomination essentially unchallenged? Nope, nope, nope and nope. Oddly, you would likely be closer if you said our biggest issue, especially within the conservative Christian camp, is whether a person should be able to use the bathroom of the gender with which they identify. Realistically this has been a point of contention and debate in one form or another for quite a few years, with instances like bakers refusing to make cakes for same gender weddings, the push to legalize same gender marriage, local government officials refusing to execute their civic duty when it comes to issuing said marriage licenses and a myriad of other rights that members of the LGBTQ community are working toward gaining. And in all that, Christians have been some of the loudest voices of opposition.
Normally it does not bother me when a group, whether conservative or liberal, simply voice their opinion. Even though I am an evangelical Christian, I spent two decades in the military defending each American’s right to say what they want, whether I agree with it or not. But, as a Christian, I have what some would call, fairly liberal views when it comes to the issue of same gender marriage and this transgender bathroom issue. Ultimately, I believe that the bible was not given to Christians as a means to police others’ lives or behaviors. I think one of the intentions of the bible is that it used more like a mirror than a magnifying glass. Unfortunately, it is not difficult to look around and see that many Christians prefer to use the bible as a manual for policing others.
With that said, I still do not have an issue with Christians voicing their opinion as long as it is open and productive conversation. However, many Christians, are not sure what it is supposed to look like to live out the directive, “be in the world, but not of it.” Because of this lack of clarity it is often easier to grab hold of clichés like “hate the sin, love the sinner” and hope that it is a suitable mantra for navigating the precarious waters of our pluralistic society. Sadly, this “sin vs. sinner” mentality openly complicates the situation because it is often difficult to separate the perceived “sin” from the perceived “sinner.” And, because the LGBTQ community views their orientation as an identity and not a behavior, they feel attacked and alienated. Even still, there are a lot of Christians that sit in this “sin vs. sinner” paradigm and are really trying to mine out how it all fits together in a way that spells love to the person. Regrettably, with this view, most won’t get there in a way that communicates the Gospel message the manner that Jesus gave it to us, one with a focus on relationship and real, lived out, grace-directed love. But at least they’re trying.
Then there is the other side. The side that uses fear in an attempt to manipulate those that are trying to figure out what “hate the sin, love the sinner” should look like. The side that somehow convinces so many that bad things will happen, to you, your children, your spouse, if we allow the whatever they identify as the new “threat” to actually take place. The other side is a fear-monger. They twist and bend stories so that it proves their point. For those Christians trying to figure this stuff out, the other side makes the “sin” and the “sinner” the same thing and uses fear to convince them that if they do not fight it, they are inviting the demise of our “Christian nation.” There are plenty of examples of this, but one of the most recent that made me genuinely angry was published on May 14th by ChristianNews.net. The title of the article was, “Eight-Year-Old Girl Choked in Restroom by Man in City Pushing ‘Transgender’ Access Rights.” That article was shared on Facebook nearly 25K times.
The short version of the article is that a man walked into a Jason’s Deli, in Chicago, IL, and targeted a young girl and her mother as they went into the bathroom. The man then entered the bathroom, choked the girl unconscious, while her mother was in a stall next to her, and attempted to carry the girl into a stall. Thankfully, the mother heard her daughter scream and was able to alert the deli employees, who held the man until the police arrived. Pretty cut and dry right? Wrong. Nowhere in the article does the man, law enforcement, Jason’s Deli employees or the mother mention that the assailant identified as transgender. I was pretty shocked that the article, as Christian News reported it, didn’t mention this seemingly important detail, since they put it in the title. I thought maybe I missed something, so I looked up the story and found five different legitimate news outlets that reported on the incident and wouldn’t you know it, none of them mentioned the man identifying as transgender. In fact, as far as I could find, Jason’s Deli does not have a policy that allows the free use of public facilities, yet. What we have here is a case of a bad man doing something bad, regardless of the presence of a policy allowing him entry or not. This is also not the first instance of a heterosexual man walking into a women’s bathroom and assaulting a woman or girl. What we also have is a “Christian” “news” organization that took advantage of a horrible situation, which was not even connected to the transgender bathroom issue, and twisted it in order to invoke fear. And for what? Click-bait? At the very least, this is grossly irresponsible reporting and at its worst, this is fear-mongering aimed at disguising hate for people as loving rebuke of behavior.
As Christians, we are not supposed to operate in or be influenced by fear. In fact, because perfect love casts out fear, if we are genuinely following Jesus, who is Love, our response will be focused toward relationship and give a wide berth to anyone that attempts to invoke fear. I wonder sometimes what we would think of “hate the sin, love the sinner” if we honestly viewed ourselves through that lens. Would it be easy to believe that God loved us as a person, or would we constantly doubt? I am not saying that we, as Christians, should not hate sin. We should despise sin, but we should hate our own sin and let that drive us into the presence of God and back out to people that we know need His love.
I’m not sure how this conversation moves forward, but I do know what stalls it out. What alienates people from experiencing Jesus is garbage like this. I think one of the most important things is that we stop viewing others as “sinners” and start seeing them how God desires us to, as people. Real life, hurting and happy, messed up and awesome, wonderful people. People that want to be connected, accepted and do the same for others.
Maybe if we stop acting like we are having our rights taken from us and start realizing that we are simply being asked to share the privilege that we’ve had, uncontested, for a long time we will stop looking like we hate others and start to look more like Jesus intended us to.
Photo: Flickr/Peter K.Levy
love the picture it shows exactly what transgender people go thru every day
so it appears that the article wasn’t really about false representation or twisting an incident to make a point? My bad …
Bruce – beautiful piece. I completely agree with you.
Thanks, Erin.
I’m not sure that I would prevent trans people from using the bathroom of the gender to which they identify, but I think it’s wrong and hypocritical to state that the comfort and safety concerns of the few trump the comfort and safety concerns of the many.
Please provide concrete documentation that protecting transgender rights has negatively impacted the “comfort and safety” of the many. Here in Minnesota, we’ve had a law protecting transgender people from discrimination since 1991 and the only “bathroom predator” we’ve had to deal with is Republican Senator Larry “wide-stance” Craig at the MSP airport.
@ Tim
The issue with discomfort is it’s subjective. There is a difference between feeling uncomfortable and unsafe and being uncomfortable and unsafe. How many transgendered individuals were killed in Chicago as opposed to straight men? How long has there not been a bathroom bill, yet there are still transgendered people alive. They not go to the bathroom?
Your post doesn’t even make sense. First of all, the number of straight men or transgendered individuals in Chicago who have been murdered isn’t relevant. You seem to be under the impression that the law passed in Charlotte was about bathrooms when it was about non-discrimination and never even mentioned bathrooms. The whole bathroom thing was brought up by the GOP at the state level because they saw how successful it was in whipping up hysteria and mobilizing bigots previously in Houston and Jacksonville to repeal non-discrimination laws.
@ Tim “First of all, the number of straight men or transgendered individuals in Chicago who have been murdered isn’t relevant.” Sure it is. Your argument to others is that their unease is not relevant because it is not real. Real in the sense that there is not a significant risk of harm. You’re already asserting that the mere discomfort of CIS women is insufficient. Why then is the mere discomfort of the transgendered sufficient if they are not subjected to actual harm although they perceive to be under attack? There are other laws that may infringe on liberties if… Read more »
“You’re already asserting that the mere discomfort of CIS women is insufficient. Why then is the mere discomfort of the transgendered sufficient if they are not subjected to actual harm although they perceive to be under attack?” First, this still has nothing to do with Chicago. Second, as previously stated, laws protecting transgendered people have been on the books in various cities and states since the late 1980s. So why is everyone suddenly uneasy about restrooms in 2016? Transgendered women using the women’s room do not threaten anyone. HB2, by forcing transgendered women to use the men’s room does. “Does… Read more »
“First, this still has nothing to do with Chicago.” Neither does Minnesota, but you chose to bring that up, but fairness and consistency really isn’t your thing. “HB2, by forcing transgendered women to use the men’s room does.” Now it’s time for you to provide concrete facts. “No, because they present as women, and in many cases have had surgery to complete their gender reassignment.” And I’ve seen conservatives offer compromise legislation that would recognize the new gender of a person after sex reassignment surgery with the group opposing it being the LGBTQ community. One concern is how a person… Read more »
“either does Minnesota, but you chose to bring that up, but fairness and consistency really isn’t your thing ” It does actually since you brought up homicide rates in Chicago (irrelevant) while I brought up a law that protects transgendered people (highly relevant). But then reading comprehension really isn’t your thing. “Now it’s time for you to provide concrete facts.” You write that as if you ever presented facts. You haven’t. Approximately 600 women are sexually assaulted or raped every day in the US. “And I’ve seen conservatives offer compromise legislation that would recognize the new gender of a person… Read more »
“It does actually since you brought up homicide rates in Chicago (irrelevant) while I brought up a law that protects trans gendered people ” So how does allowing trans people the opportunity to use the rest room of their gender identity actually protect any more than their feelings? Oh yeah, 600 WOMEN are raped every day. You do realize that it’s WOMEN who oppose cross gender rest room access because of fear of rape? Let’s conflate the two issues though and prend that it’s the trans community at risk. If I didn’t have sycj doubts about your intellectual capacity, I’d… Read more »
“If I didn’t have sycj doubts about your intellectual capacity, I’d have to start questioning your honesty.”
Big words from someone who thinks sycj is a word.
As for the so-called compromise. It amounted to Charlotte removing its protections which isn’t a compromise at all. HB2 is a bad law and it’s going to be removed in total. Deal with it.
@ Tim
“which by the way happens to be unconstitutional”.
Really?
“Pamela Karlan, who teaches public interest law at Stanford University, summed it up this way:
“The real question here is: How do we determine what a person’s sex is?”
The answer goes to the heart of whether federal civil rights laws that bar sex discrimination protect transgender Americans.
Read more here: http://www.charlotteobserver.com/news/politics-government/article77423807.html#storylink=cpy”
http://www.charlotteobserver.com/news/politics-government/article77423807.html
As usual, you are (willfully?) missing the point. The Romer vs. Evans decision found that it was unconstitutional for the state of Colorado to remove protections for LGBT community that were passed in cities like Denver or Boulder. Thus, the state of NC, by passing a law which removes protections in cities like Charlotte is illegal.
No, it is not illegal. You’re misunderstand what law is. It may be immoral. It may be unconscionable. There is no protections for the transgender that I am aware of that could not be nullified by HB2. I don’t misunderstand what HB2 is. I don’t support it. I merely think that it is hypocritical in the absence of proof to the contrary to say that trans people should have the ability to utilize the rest rooms of their gender identity because of comfort while ignoring the comfort of CIS women (and men too. I have no issue with gender neutral… Read more »
“No, it is not illegal. You’re misunderstand what law is.” It is and I do. “In a 6-to-3 decision, the Court held that Amendment 2 of the Colorado State Constitution violated the equal protection clause. Amendment 2 singled out homosexual and bisexual persons, imposing on them a broad disability by denying them the right to seek and receive specific legal protection from discrimination. In his opinion for the Court, Justice Anthony Kennedy noted that oftentimes a law will be sustained under the equal protection clause, even if it seems to disadvantage a specific group, so long as it can be… Read more »
But transgenders are not disadvantaged as they get to use a restroom and therefor you are incorrect again. CIS people can’t use any restroom they choose either.
Straight women have attacked other women in bathrooms too! I see there’s a case of a straight woman filming other women in the women’s changing room at a gym and got caught for it! Apparently it was for her pornsite! Lesbian women share the same facilities as straight women. Do you want to segregate bathrooms incase something happens there? Commonsense. If any person attacks/assaults/predates or films other people in the bathroom. It’s against the law and those who do those thing should be arrested! And in general the vast, vast majority of straight/gay/lesbian/transgender people ARE NOT assaulting/attcking/predating and filming people… Read more »
Without question, the largest group of abusers of children are their parents. I suggest the law be modified to not only look out for men who dress up as women in order to stealth their way into bathrooms, but also stop parents from going into bathrooms alone with their children. I do understand this may be a bit impractical for those few good parents that don’t abuse their children, so parents could ask for a stranger to supervise their trip to the bathroom with their children. Just need to double check that the stranger chosen is not one of those… Read more »
Thank you for speaking truth in a sea of absurd lies.
The fact that a man illegally goes into a bathroom to choke a young girl should concern policy makers who are considering making it legal for a man to enter the women’s bathrooms. It doesn’t matter if the man is identifying as transgender, it isn’t transgender men that women are afraid of when they ask that we keep laws that restrict men from entering women’s rooms. Because at a fundamental level, that is what this law allows, any man can enter a womens bathroom or change room. What will keep adult men from entering women’s change rooms at a pool… Read more »
“Because at a fundamental level, that is what this law allows, any man can enter a womens bathroom or change room ”
Nope. Not even close. The law that passed in Charlotte simply made it illegal to discriminate against the LGBT community. This whole bathroom/changing room hysteria promoted by the authors of HB2 is a cover from their true aim which to override all LGBT nondiscrimination laws in the state of NC.
“Nope. Not even close. The law that passed in Charlotte simply made it illegal to discriminate against the LGBT community. This whole bathroom/changing room hysteria promoted by the authors of HB2 is a cover from their true aim which to override all LGBT nondiscrimination laws in the state of NC.” Which, translates to exactly what was said, “that any man can enter a woman’s bathroom or change room”. You seem to be talking in circles, Tim, avoiding the reality, or the understanding of how emotional law leaves itself wide open to manipulation and abuse. This type of assumption thinking is… Read more »
“You seem to be talking in circles, Tim, avoiding the reality, or the understanding of how emotional law leaves itself wide open to manipulation and abuse ”
Here’s the reality, DJ. These laws have been around for a long time in certain states. See the link below, which I’ve already posted which shows that the hysteria in NC is completely unwarranted.
http://mediamatters.org/research/2014/03/20/15-experts-debunk-right-wing-transgender-bathro/198533
“Here’s the reality, DJ. These laws have been around for a long time in certain states. See the link below, which I’ve already posted which shows that the hysteria in NC is completely unwarranted.” But you haven’t been able to produce anything so far that shows that allowing the transgender access to the rest room of their gender identity actually protects them from harm. You haven’t shown that the “right” is necessary so it comes down to comfort. I don’t see why the comfort of a single transgendered person is more important than the comfort of 100 CIS women. That’s… Read more »
“I don’t see why the comfort of a single transgendered person is more important than the comfort of 100 CIS women.” The point is, that the cis women of Colorado, Connecticut, Hawaii, Iowa, Maine, Massachusetts, Minnesota, Nevada, New Mexico, Oregon, Rhode Island, and Vermont have laws that protect transgendered people against job discrimination and accommodations (including restrooms), and there was absolutely no outcry from cis women about it, only the usual bigots. With HB2, a bunch of cis men in North Carolina’s government had a hissy fit because Charlotte passed an LGBT anti-discrimination law and decided to use a strategy… Read more »
To bring across some of your arguments. Aren’t there already laws against murder? What does that have to do with rest room use?
And perhaps those of us with some valid concerns for what is being shoved down our throats actually are NOT fear mongering, but discussing this issue with some reality as well. But instead of listening, the other side would rather call us hate mongers, bigots, etc – not even seeing how hypocritical their comments about hate are. I do have some valid concerns. Who is going to decide who is actually “transgender”? Call Target, a man can enter the women’s restrooms. No one is going to question whether he’s transgender or not. And as a sexual abuse survivor with ptsd,… Read more »
“So please don’t tell me that these men won’t ever take advantage of this situation because real life has shown me that they will. And when they do, what can we do? NOTHING. Because they’ll be allowed. And that is not acceptable.” Where do you get the strange idea that a man who assaults a woman in a women’s restroom will be able to get away with it under the non-discrimination law passed in Charlotte? Obviously assault is outlawed in any case. Moreover, everyone concerned about bathrooms seems to ignore the the more insidious part of HB2 which eliminates anti-discrimination… Read more »
“Where do you get the strange idea that a man who assaults a woman in a women’s restroom will be able to get away with it under the non-discrimination law passed in Charlotte?” ______ Not get away with, but we are opening the door for them, and in doing so will open a very large can of worms. “Get away with” is moot to the individual abused. We are talking about prevention, not yet another social service build around bathroom abuse, or another legal task force handling such issues. Again, if you provide the opportunity for abuse, abuse will occur.… Read more »
“And perhaps those of us with some valid concerns for what is being shoved down our throats actually are NOT fear mongering, but discussing this issue with some reality as well. But instead of listening, the other side would rather call us hate mongers, bigots,”
Attack the speaker, not the speech. it is a tool of manipulation used to quell disagreement when such contention holed rational merit. Emotionally formatted laws, go hand in hand with emotional response and manipulation.
Thank you for telling the truth. We as a society are so being fed full of lies today by especially the media, I’ve come to believe we need a revolution against the 4th estate most of all. Sad. Tom also speaks the truth. God knows we need more of it.
I will be the first one in the room to stand up and call people out for false witness. No one should manipulate situations so as to appear to be what they are not. In so far as the story you mentioned, where were the other patrons who may have noticed a man walking into the women’s room? Have we reached a point that people are now afraid to step in when it doesn’t look right? That being said, all I can say is welcome to the world of media. In a recent article here at GMP, the writer made… Read more »