Jay Palter wants you to know that getting snipped is really not a big deal.
Originally appeared at Homemade Dad
Yesterday, I got snipped. As in, went to Dr. Snippy. As in, got a vas ligation – AKA, a vasectomy.
And today, I’m lying in bed thinking: I don’t feel that bad at all. So what was all the anxiety and worrying about?
When it comes to medical procedures involving our tenderest parts, we men can get wimpy—so wimpy that marketers of female contraceptive devices use it sell women their products. We can get preoccupied with the details and lose site of the bigger picture, which is this: vasectomies are a common, low-risk, minimally invasive procedure that men can, and should, undertake after their reproductive years are over.
With this in mind, I’ve written the following short guide to having a vasectomy. If you are considering this procedure—but worrying way too much about it and making up complex excuses for why you don’t want to have it—I offer you my own experience and learnings which can be summarized in a phrase: get over yourself, man.
- A vasectomy is not as bad as you may imagine. I’m not suggesting this is a pleasant procedure or that it is completely free of anxiety or pain, but in the grand scheme of things it is not that bad. Your typical sports injuries are much more painful. Hell, getting a baseball in the groin area is way worse. If suffering kidney stones are a 10 in terms of pain experience, then getting a vasectomy is like a 1 or 2. In other words, the bark is worse than the bite.
- Find a doctor you trust. Start by asking your physician for a referral, but don’t hesitate to ask your buddies about their experiences. If I’m going to let anyone near my scrotum with sharp objects, it’s got to be a person in whom I have a high degree of trust and confidence. Someone who has a good reputation among people in the know. Find a male doctor that’s had a vasectomy and go to his surgeon.
- Avoid too much information. There are a wide variety of methods for doing vasectomies these days and lots of then are minimally invasive, avoiding the use of a scalpel or even a needle in applying the local anesthetic. (The ones that avoid a scalpel use a knitting needle. Joking.) But beware of doing too much research. Even a casual YouTube or Google image search on “vasectomy” reveals (don’t go there – I’m warning you) some very disturbing images that may have little to do with the type of procedure you’re having. My strategy: approach it on a “need to know” basis combined with a dose of willful ignorance. I knew there would be a needle to start, then some pulling and tugging, and I’d be on my way in about 15 minutes. Seriously, if you’re in the hands of a trusted surgeon, does anybody need to know more than that?
- Shaving can be enjoyable. If you’re not used to shaving your nether regions, the experience can be, well, enlightening. Basically, the strategy here is to use the electric trimmer to get as short as you can, then move in with the blade. I used the same high-end shaving gel that I use on my face, only to discover a more pronounced cooling effect on the more sensitive scrotal skin. Nice. A note to self-shavers: the theatre of operations is basically the front of the scrotum, but getting to the left side with the right hand (and vice versa) can be dodgy. Don’t switch the razor to your left hand unless you are capably ambidextrous. In the end, I’m thinking it might be worth keeping the area shaved for a while. “Your wife will love it,” my urologist told me as I lay on my back staring at the ceiling. I’ll bet he says that to all the guys.
- Take time to recover. Vasectomies where I come from are scheduled on Friday mornings, giving you a full three days to recover over the weekend. Use that time wisely to rest and relax. Now is the time to recognize that your body has undergone some trauma and you need to taker ‘er easy. Stay horizontal and apply ice regularly to reduce swelling. Abandon the boxers and find a pair of tighter underwear for the first few days back at work – it helps to keep the boys tucked in and not dangling all about.
- Work it on out. After your vasectomy is completed, it still takes some time for the sperm to be cleared out of your system – as many as 15-20 ejaculations are required to become sperm-free. Around three months after the procedure is done, you will need to get sperm count test to confirm success.
- Can I reverse a vasectomy? If this is a serious question or you can imagine it as a plausible scenario, you should probably hold off on the surgical procedure and stick with a love glove.
Photo credit: Flickr / Florin Gorgan
Hi, please read the following guidelines from the British Association of Urology surgeons before committing to a vasectomy and fully understand the potential chronic pain risks stated :
https://www.baus.org.uk/_userfiles/pages/files/Patients/Leaflets/Vasectomy.pdf
From that source : “Troublesome chronic testicular pain is reported in up to 15% of
patients and can be severe enough to affect day-to-day activities in
up to 5%”
15% = 1 in 7
5% = 1 in 20
Hi all, good discussion on this subject. I’m getting ready to make my appointments for the procedure so I haven’t had the opportunity yet to speak with my doctor about a detail that most concerns me….I pass out whenever anyone is working on my…dermatologist was the last instance, the dentist office on many occasions (had to go to the hospital once because the lidocaine nearly stopped my heart), tattoos, etc. It’s not a pain thing, as I have a pretty high tolerance for it. Seriously. I can take some serious pain. But my brain shuts down and I’m out, violently… Read more »
Good article. Men looking to get this procedure should think deeply about the consequences. It would be wise to look into fertility preservation before the operation. http://www.floridafertility.com/fertility-preservation.html
Feeling better about my husband’s big-V. Much better than going under myself. 🙂 Sounds a lot more enjoyable. Saw another blog about the procedure that made me laugh–thought I’d share.
http://babyoffboard.com/v-day-revealed-the-hubs/
Thanks for the post and putting me at ease!
Well I had the big V yesterday and was reading this in the waiting room nervous as hell! I almost cancelled a few times and all the way up to being called in. I was very nervous about the needle going in but I have to say my doc was great! I think he pinched the skin together before the shot and the next thing I knew my left side was done! I had to ask him if he alreadyade the cut. Then on to my right side. Needle Hurt a bit more and them I felt some discomfort and… Read more »
Having mine done next week. I have only two anxieties about it: the needle to inject anesthetic, and the idea that my privates are going to be on display to a stranger for 20 minutes. I’m not really looking forward to 48 hours of discomfort but I have a pretty high pain tolerance. And the payoff will be well worth it. I wish I’d scheduled this procedure 2 or 3 years ago; the idea that I still have 3-4 months left of condom usage before I’m safely sterile is SERIOUSLY frustrating. I want to throw those things away right *now*.
Had my vasectomy 33 years ago, no pain, more blood from shaving than the op, caught the train from Dublin to Limerick immediately afterwards, never regretted it, have ridden a bicycle ever since and the only after-effect was a total absence of anxiety (and sperm I suppose)!
I am very much looking forward to the total absence of anxiety, not to mention the heightened probability of spontaneity.
Similar sentiments to you, Adam. No big deal. Thanks for sharing.
I had this done a bit less than a year ago. I had always planned on getting a vasectomy when my wife and I were done having children, the procedure is SO much easier for men than women. This floored my wife when we talked about it. Her dad is very much against such things, so she thought that most or all men would be the same. I was happy to do it, and have no regrets. I have two beautiful children and we both definitely do not want more. So I made an appointment, (we were poor enough that… Read more »
Spousal consent is a requirement if not by law then by common decency. How would you feel if your wife got sterilized without your explicit agreement?
I guess if it’s just that you don’t want KIDS in every port, you should probably divorce your wife before signing up for the snip.
Let’s look at it like this-If i want a tubal or my husband a vasectomy, I think yes of course we should discuss with each other, make a decision that we both are happy about and be informed of the surgery (however minor). Should it be a legal requirement to get permission of the other? Look at the reverse: I want my husband to have a vasectomy, he wants me to have a tubal. It is totally out of the realm of rights and ethics for me to compel me or him me. It should be out of the realm… Read more »
I’m more or less with you, Julie. Spousal consent should be seen as “very good to have”, but in the end it’s your body and my body and we make our own decisions about our bodies. If our decisions about our bodies are massively out of sync with our partners’ views, then we certainly have a problem. But not a problem that can be resolved through any coercion. Our partners either bow to our wishes or the relationship would obviously be put in jeopardy.
Thanks for your thoughtful comments on this issue. 😉
eya sorry, elective surgery is just not a risk im willing to take compared to a condom and if it breaks a “talk” and a morning after pill.
Vasectomies, especially the no-scalpel kind, are about as risky as having a root canal or getting stitches. In fact I’m willing to wager that getting stitches is more painful and possibly more prone to complications. I’ll let you know in about a week…I’ve had stitches recently, and am going in for my vasectomy next Friday.
…and for what it’s worth, I’ve done the condom thing for a couple years now and I absolutely despise it. I have yet to find a brand or variety that do not significantly dampen the enjoyment of sex. My wife and I have also recently gone through an experience where she had to get the Morning After pill. Fortunately for her, she had no major side effects; but from what I understand that’s fairly unusual. The side effects of the Morning After pill can be substantial and very unpleasant. It’s also $50 *PER PILL*. My co-pay on the vasectomy won’t… Read more »
Lots of men are questioning whether you’d need a permission from a spouse. Did you run into this?
Permission? Heck, I had to fight off my spouse’s arguments for getting a vasectomy for a few years before I finally caved. After all, they’re my “boys”.
But, joking aside, I believe the consent form did ask for spousal agreement. It’s not entirely clear to me what happens in its absence, though.
I think it’s important to discuss the issue with one’s spouse, but in the end I don’t think consent is/should be a requirement. My body, my choice, right?
OH! I thought you were talking about circumcision as an adult.
Ouch. (That’s all I can say to that.)
A small percentage of men have chronic pain after a vasectomy. After 5 years and a reversal I can have sex and run without pain, but I’ll never ride a bike again.
It’s important to know your doctor, know the procedure, and know the risks!
Thanks for the info, Jay. I had one at age 21 and never regretted it. It truly is not a big deal.
But, as you note, it IS still ‘surgery,’ albeit very minor surgery–so your body does react and need some time to recover.
Amen 😉