Why are more and more guys quitting the habit?
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In his excellent article, Courage to Quit: How I’m Outgrowing Pornography and Waking Up to My True Self, Dan Mahle describes his experiences with on-line pornography and why he decided to quit the habit.
“After a decade of porn use, I quit watching 2 years ago,” says Mahle. “I was pissed off that my sense of personal ‘sexuality’ had been reduced to sitting alone in the dark in a disembodied daze drooling over pixelated fantasies of submissive females in a desperate attempt to feel a release from the tension in my body and the void in my heart. And — I was concerned about how my porn use had become compulsive.”
I’ve been a psychotherapist specializing in male health for more than 40 years and I’ve seen a disturbing trend. I’m seeing more and more young males, between the ages of fifteen and twenty-five years old, who are having similar problems to my older male clients. Guys in their twenties are having the same issues of loss of sexual desire and difficulty getting and maintaining an erection that I have been seeing in many of my male clients who are over fifty years old and going through Andropause (Male Menopause).
One young man confided,
“I don’t know what’s happening to me, doc. I used to be horny as hell, but now I can’t get turned on to my girlfriend. And when I do, I can’t…well, I can’t perform.” This may be the first time in human history that young men are becoming impotent. As I explored the cause, one culprit continued to stand out—the use and abuse of internet pornography.
Now two young film-makers, Susanna Zdrzalek and Fritz Fechner, are creating the first documentary to help everyone understand how pornography affects the brain. The film, REWIRED: How Pornography Affects The Human Brain, features leading scientists and their research, as well as young adults who watched porn for many years of their life and at one point began to suffer from symptoms such as erectile dysfunction, inability to orgasm with a real partner, and social anxiety.
You can learn about the film and support their IndieGoGo fundraiser.
Dr. Simone Kühn, psychologist, Max Planck Institute for Human Development, Berlin, Germany says,
“We found that a structure called striatum or caudatum in the brain’s reward system is smaller in individuals who consume a lot of pornographic material, which could mean that it actually shrinks over time, depending on how much material is consumed. As a result, the individual requires increasingly more intense and more frequent stimuli in order to maintain the feeling of reward.”
Gary Wilson, writer and founder of “Your Brain On Porn” says,
“If you’re wondering why there’s not yet a consensus on the effects of internet porn despite the swell of warnings, you may find the history of the Tobacco Wars instructive. Years ago, most everyone smoked including movie stars on screen. People loved puffing. It calmed the nerves, offered a predictable buzz and looked sophisticated. How could such a wonderful activity really be detrimental? Was nicotine truly addictive? When tar showed up in cadaver lungs incredulous smokers preferred to blame asphalt.”
In his engaging TED talk, Wilson points out that most boys seek pornography by age 10 driven by a brain that is fascinated by sex. But Wilson recognizes that highly simulating pornography can cause problems. I’ve seen this over the years treating people with addictions to such things as drugs and alcohol, gambling, overeating, and increasingly pornography.
Susana and Fritz interviewed many young men and women for their film, REWIRED:
Gabe Deem, age 27:
“Things got really bad when I was twelve years old. That’s when my parents got high speed Internet. What I would do is: I would go out from middle school and go home as fast as I could and watch porn, look whatever I could for three or four hours before my parents got home from work.”
Daniel Simmons, age 22:
“I couldn’t get an erection when with my girlfriend or they would be very weak. During my porn addiction I was asexual. I was maybe sexual with porn, but I wasn’t sexual with human beings.”
Noah B. E. Church, age 25:
“I searched the Internet and I found thousands of guys like me, talking about these sexual dysfunctions that they developed. I read these stories, just seeing that they were so much like mine, knowing that I wasn’t alone. And that lifted such a massive weight off of me.”
Even though we often associate pornography use with males, it is becoming an increasing problem for young women as well. On the face of it, bubbly law graduate Oghosa Ovienrioba is a 22-year-old with a bright future ahead of her. But she used to hide a dark secret—an all-consuming addiction to online pornography. It was a habit that first kicked in when she was just 14 and sneaked a look at online porn on her computer.
“It was out of curiosity and it was just a simple Google search for me to get hold of an adult movie. When I first watched it, my reaction was shock. But gradually over time, that shock becomes excitement and I would use any porn that I could get my hands on.”
From the ages of 18 to 21, she would lock herself in a dark room and watch adult movies endlessly, masturbating up to six times a day at her worst point. The popular video blogger is now trying to help others after bravely speaking out about her addiction on YouTube in a series that has amassed more than 800,000 hits.
Why your help matters
Susanna Zdrzalek and Fritz Fechner are asking for our help to complete their film. I believe it is a very worthwhile endeavor and hope you’ll take a look and decide if you’d like to support their efforts. Here’s why they think this work is important:
- Scientists around the world are struggling to raise money for their research on the effect of pornography on the human brain. For many institutes and universities this topic is still a taboo.
- Meanwhile, countless people continue to suffer because they are not diagnosed and treated properly.
- By openly addressing this important issue, we might be able to accelerate scientific research and ultimately succeed in creating a better public understanding.
Whatever our age and background or whether we believe pornography is good or bad, problematic or benign, we will all benefit from increased knowledge. I look forward to your comments.
Photo: Photo Credit: Getty Images
How is pornography not helping a guy who is rejected when he asks a girl to be his gf??
Hi Jed, I’m happy someone is talking about an issue which is not researched properly and is difficult to examine at the scientific level. I would like to share my experience and knowledge of how Vipassana meditation as discovered by Buddha can give answer to this issue. Please reach me at [email protected]. Would be happy to help you. Thank you.
The addiction model is rarely used to describe high-frequency use of visual sexual stimuli (VSS) in research, yet common in media and clinical practice. The theory and research behind ‘pornography addiction’ is hindered by poor experimental designs, limited methodological rigor, and lack of model specification. The history and limitations of addiction models are reviewed, including how VSS fails to meet standards of addiction. These include how VSS use can reduce health-risk behaviors. Proposed negative effects, including erectile problems, difficulty regulating sexual feelings, and neuroadaptations are discussed as non-pathological evidence of learning. Individuals reporting ‘addictive’ use of VSS could be better… Read more »
@Anonguy: The excerpt you chose from “The Emperor Has No Clothes: A Review of the ‘Pornography Addiction’ Model” is completely unsupported. In fact, nearly everything in that article is unsupported. It was a biased paper posing as a review of the literature. written by the author of The Myth of Sex Addiction, David Ley. It was published a in a journal that had been on hiatus for 6 years, and the editors have written articles saying porn addiction doesn’t exist. The following is very long analysis which goes line by line showing all the tricks they pulled. It completely destroys… Read more »
Every once in a while, I find myself not wanting to talk to anyone. I will close the doors and windows and watch hours of TV shows, movies, etc. I might not speak, text or email with a single person all day. I have found that after one of these episodes I feel lethargic and sad – whereas I was just in need of a break from the world at the beginning of the day. It isn’t porn that I watch but the lethargy and sadness are hard for me to come out of. I don’t want to talk to… Read more »
Very good point.
t should be illegal for this kind of huckster bull crap to be passed off as real.
Hey Jed. Great article. As a psychologist in clinical practice for over twenty years myself treating kids, teens, and adults I’ve been seeing similar trends. I created GetKidsInternetSafe.com partially because my practice has been flooded with compulsive online porn viewing from kids as young as 10, boys and girls. As a professor teaching addiction studies and clinical psychology at CSUCI, I can also attest to concerning research findings, many identified in the comments here, that behavioral addictions like porn and gambling activate the pleasure center in the brain in the same way as all drugs of addiction (dopamine in the… Read more »
I feel the same way abouts “Sports Porn” that watching sports on media can depreciate ones capacity to go out and do sports activities leaving a generation of couch potatoes.
While I’m a big proponent of research, I also know that it can be skewed any way a researcher wants depending on current trends and the whatever the mindless public is chewing up at the time. This society has an addiction TO the word addiction and is consistently looking to create illness instead of curing people by sticking to the basics. I didn’t see mentioned extrinsic factors that would affect this so called “ED”: the garbage and people pacifying chemicals large companies put in huge amounts of processed foods, the constant hammering to stay in front of a computer screen… Read more »
A lively discussion. All of which tells me, there are strong feelings generated whenever we talk about sex, love, and relationships. I wrote the article to share of own thoughts, to make people aware of a film in the making that people could learn about and support if were so moved. My perspective is that of a man who grew up in an era where “pornography” was the occasional nature magazine I came across as a 10 year old. Now 10 year olds have access to highly stimulating internet pornography that is available 24/7 and has an endless variety of… Read more »
@Logton Don’t patronize me. I covered the first two points, which was more time than I planned to spend, and what I got back was another regurgitated collage from Gary Wilson archives of spam. If YOU want to have a discussion, then present your thoughts and ideas and not prefabricated advertisement from Your Brain on Porn, or Reboot Something or Other. And glancing at your latest spam, I now see you’re quoting the comment section from articles on Psychology Today. By the way, did you know that Gary Wilson’s page on Phychology Today critiquing Dr. Nicole Prause (Sexual Desire and… Read more »
@Logton Wow, you seem to know an awful lot about Nicole Prause. Details I couldn’t find. Especially this bizarre bit about alleged harassment. Who would know such details? And you seem very invested in Prause’s ED paper – the one you posted in your first comment. Hmmmm…. I did not link to Gary Wilson, but instead linked to psychology professor John Johnson’s comments pointing out that Prause misrepresented her EEG study. I also described the Cambridge study (Neural Correlates of Sexual Cue Reactivity in Individuals with and without Compulsive Sexual Behaviours, 2014), which also said that Prause’s EEG aligned with… Read more »
That Nicole Prause gets harassed for simply doing science is quite relevant to this conversation. I’ve seen this pattern many times before from the pro-addiction tribe – frankly, they come across as anti-vax types. As stated before, there are valid criticisms to be had – whether brain markers are evidence for or against the labeling of something as a disorder (for example) etc You are not following the conversation. I addressed 2 of the 7 points, and now you’ve replied that I’ve not addressed any of the 9 points. The very first point from Deem (the personal trainer it seems),… Read more »
@elissa – It’s quite interesting that you know so many details about Nicole Prause and about Nicole Prause’s new ED paper that you posted in your first comment. Excuse me for not taking undocumented claims about a “lab lockdown” or “harassment” seriously. I cannot, as we have documented instances of both Prause & Pfaus egregiously misrepresenting their studies to the press. (See above). I do not consider either trustworthy. It is telling that you will not address these documented misrepresentations, or Gabe’s points, 1 – 8. No retraction until you address all 3: 1) Jim Pfaus lying in TV interview… Read more »
Wait, I thought ED made men better lovers?
Couple of things: There is no clear link between erectile dysfunction and the watching of pornography. Some studies, like the one just below, actually find the opposite. http://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1002/sm2.58/full Conclusion: VSS (visual sexual stimulus) use within the range of hours tested is unlikely to negatively impact sexual functioning, given that responses actually were stronger in those who viewed more VSS. Secondly, and to be thorough, we should also study the use of vibrators among women. Who knows, it could be why so many women cannot achieve orgasm during partner sex. Lastly, we should also study why having sexual fantasies during masturbation… Read more »
Elissa The study you refers to did not test men looking at what is what I will call porn on the internet today. I am not qualifed to tell what is out there since I do not watch porn,but I am told it is not all nice and kind. -The study you tell us about, is a study where men are told to watch: “one man one woman engaged in consensual vaginal intercourse. They EXCLUDED low case rate behavior (e.g., bondage, anal sex).” In other words we can not conclude from this study that men will not have negative influence… Read more »
Elissa
I see I misunderstood the design and intentions of this reseach project,
No worries SIlke.
All studies have limitations. This is the nature of Bayesian statistics. Base rate analysis is definitely important when drawing conclusions – and though I’m not sure about bondage depictions, I don’t think anal sex is much of an outlier in pornography (gay or straight).
Are you saying that specific depictions of pornography cause ED? Violent forms more so than non-violent, for example?
Elissa I am not qualifed to say anything about what caused addiction and do not know if there is such a thing as porn addiction.I can be addictied to a man 🙂 and that is complicated enough…….. But it is something about online porn that is not good for me so I choose to live without it and protect my warm feelings for men . But there is something I do not understand. Do men seek stimuly to become aroused often , as if that is good thing? I can understand that they seek porn to get a release ,… Read more »
@ Silke I can only speak for me and there are different reasons for it. Sometimes I’ll run across a story and need to satisfy a curiosity. Sometimes I’ll deliberately seek the fantasy. Other times, it’s just something to do and I’ll admit that at times I do it because I think that I’m supposed to. That’s probably the part that I would want to address, if I considered it a big deal, which I don’t. I’ve mentioned before that my friends and I would go to a strip club every year or so. We did that for many years… Read more »
you see ,I read the other day that often when women are aroused they do nothing about .And it is true for me (and made my husbank think I had lost my libido). I see it as a heathy sign to want sex and feel arousal but I do not feel I have ot act on it and nor do I feel less of a woman if it does not happen every day . I suspect it means something different to men,like as if you want to see that everything is in full working ordre so to speak or that… Read more »
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3015471/SEX-Britain-2015-One-Average-couple-sex-three-times-month-mid-lifers-make-love-young-Compiled-Cambridge-professor-depth-study-does-Britain-s-bedrooms-startle.html
interesting!
Women had more sex in 1920 ……
If the average couple has sex 3 times a month, then it’s no wonder porn use is so high. I would seriously consider dumping a woman if 3 times a month was the rate we had sex. Twice a week is pretty much a BARE minimum for my relationships, needs and desires.
Silke, I know you aren’t answering my comments, but I’ll give you my input anyway, just as informaiton so you don’t have to reply on it. Personally, I don’t seek out porn to become aroused. Also, I don’t explicitly NEED to act upon it each and every time I become aroused (I guess that would have been both cumbersome and a fair bit embarissing in the teens and 20’s when arousal might appear several times an hour…) So I would guess that MOST men MOST of the time they get aroused also do most nothing about it. However I also… Read more »
The study you link to was has been critiqued by Gabe Deem – http://www.rebootnation.org/forum/index.php?page=Prause_ED_Study_Critique It contains many flaws that leave us to question the results. Some of the points that Gabe Deem made about thestudy: 1) This was not a study on men with ED or on men with problematic porn use. 2) This was not a study at all. Rather the authors claimed to have snagged data from four of Prause’s earlier studies – none of which were about ED. 3) None of the data from the 4 underlying studies match the data in the current “study”. One example:… Read more »
I’d like to add more: WHAT DO ED STUDIES SHOW? First, Kinsey (1948) reported less than 3% rate of ED for men under 40. Less than 1% for men 19 and under. Second, the only cross-sectional study of ED rates in American men reported a 5% rate of ED in men ages 18-59. This was based on data from 1992, and one third of the men were over 40. Then we move to 2012-2015, and studies on men under 40 (some are on men 25 and under). They show a 600% or more increase in youthful ED in the last… Read more »
Logton, Thanks for the detailed update on statistics. We need all the factual information we can get to alert clinicians and the average person alike to the science that is generating the concern in increased erectile dysfunction in boys and men, particularly the large increases in recent years among young males. The reporting of these studies takes the discussion out of the realm of anecdote and personal values, though these are important as well. We clearly need more light shown on these important areas. As a father of 4 boys and 1 girl and grandfather of 7 boys and 7… Read more »
@ logton
OK, but look at what’s happening in Japan. Granted the internet allows you to get whatever porn you want, but Japanese porn is heavily censored and most of the people who’ve lost interest in sex are women. Are we to believe that women watch more porn in Japan than men?
http://www.theguardian.com/world/2013/oct/20/young-people-japan-stopped-having-sex
“A survey earlier this year by the Japan Family Planning Association (JFPA) found that 45% of women aged 16-24 “were not interested in or despised sexual contact”. More than a quarter of men felt the same way.”
Could it be environmental? Food additives like hormones?
@ John Anderson Here’s another quote based on that same Japanese survey: “Males age 16-19 in 2008 who “have no interest in sex or have an aversion to it”: 17.5 percent (compared with 36.1 percent in 2010)” It’s hard to imagine that pesticides or other pollutants could cause a doubling of “no interest is sex” in just 2 years. Besides, the levels of toxins needed to inhibit sexual desire in young men would have to be accompanied by many other signs and symptoms. The Medical Doctor behind the survey wrote a book where he primarily blamed porn and artificial sexual… Read more »
@ logton “3) “that some young men come to his clinic complaining of erectile dysfunction” 4) “while others explain that watching too much sex on internet sites has left them with a bad taste in their mouth” Guys complained about ED, some other guys couldn’t get enough. It’s possible that porn use could affect different people in different ways, but it’s also possible that porn had nothing to do with it as one would expect that people would be affected in the same way. “1) “One young man said that having sex with someone is “just too much of a… Read more »
Guess what else happened in the last 15-20 years? Major increase in the levels of childhood obesity, and obesity is linked with E.D Major increase in the usage of devices at night interrupted the circadian rythym such as PC’s and bright phones. Major increase in prescription of anti-depressants and other medications affecting the brain. I know of personal experience that anti-depressants seriously messed with my ability to achieve orgasm and is the number 1 reason I will never touch them again. Potential environmental damage via some Plastics with BP-A and BP-S acting as xenoestrogens and interfering with hormones. Puberty onset… Read more »
Archy you ask some good questions. Key brain development during young years…… Then what about persons that have a background with childhood sexual abuse? They are many. Is this the group most vulnerable to the effects of porn on brain? There is such a thing that feels like addiction to love affairs, so why not also to internet porn? If you return again and again to something you want to turn away from ,then you do behave like an addict. I have experienced this in cyber romance,and each day I said to him and myself ” I need to get… Read more »
I believe the term “addiction” refers to a specific issue of compulsive use despite negative effects vs habits formed. If you google habit vs addiction it goes into it a lot more. What can appear as addictive to the common person may simply be harmful habits vs the true meaning of addiction.
@ archy – “Guess what else happened in the last 15-20 years? Major increase in the levels of childhood obesity, and obesity is linked with E.D” A few problems with the obesity hypothesis: 1) Erectile dysfunction rates for men under 40 have increased between 600% -2000% in the last 15-20 years, depending on what earlier stats you use. See my other post. 2) Obesity in men (20-40) only increased 4 percentage points between 1999 and 2008 (and rates have begun dropping for some age groups in 2010, especially teens). So, obesity can’t explain a dramatic, continuing rise in youthful ED.… Read more »
@ logton
Several questions come to mind. Was that prior to Viagra? What were the treatments and effectiveness? How reluctant were men to report ED during the time frames? Did Viagra fix it? Doctors haven’t to my knowledge been treating it with “rebooting” the brain.
Could it explain part of it? Less blood circulation is meant to be the obesity-caused E.D from what I’ve read.
Longton; thank you for reviewing the article. I wonder why it hasn’t been peer reviewed before it was published. Anyhow, there’s no need for that now – since you’ve executed it so perfectly. This general subject is really interesting and an important one. Let’s hope that the ones reaserching this subject in the future are good scholared people. And that the studies are being made at Universities that won’t let studies get published without good peer reviews.
Who exactly is Gabe Deem?
Is he a researcher? What are Gabe’s qualifications exactly?
No need to spam this thread with layman analysis. You can just link to it.
Elissa – “No need to spam this thread with layman analysis”
Care to actually read and address the points made in Gabe’s critique? The 9 main points in his critique came from the Prause & Pfaus ED paper, and Prause’s 4 underlying studies that were cobbled together to create the new paper. Nothing in the current paper aligns with those underlying studies. Those 9 points are documented and not disputable.
Please take on the content, if you can.
The aim of the study linked is as described in the aim of the study linked. “The aim of this study was to examine whether the time spent viewing VSS is related to sexual responsiveness felt in the laboratory or with a sexual partner.” That is what the study is about. The first criticism I read was something about the study not being “about” men with ED or men who have problems with their porn habits. It’s also not about window washers. What is the point of this criticism exactly? The second criticism is just as mopey. I’m sure valid… Read more »
@Elissa – So I guess you don’t have anything to say about the 9 points made by Gabe Deem which pretty much invalidate the study’s findings? Instead, you find some random quote about “locking down her lab”. Did she also call a SWAT team? Really believable. One thing we do know, Nicole Prause has a history of misrepresenting her findings to the press. She did so with her other well known study from 2013. In this Psychology Today interview Prause claimed: Prause: “If our study is replicated, these findings would represent a major challenge to existing theories of sex “addiction”.… Read more »
Thank you Logton. The Gabe Deem link was interesting.
And on top of all this, people in UK have 20% less sex than just a short time ago ( no I do not have any links).
@ Silke
“And on top of all this, people in UK have 20% less sex than just a short time ago ( no I do not have any links).”
What is the gender break down? If it’s more women like in Japan, how can this be attributed to porn use?
do you mean if it is men or women that has less sex than earlier?
I do not remember the name of the study but it is recent ,and about sex life in the UK.
What happens in Japan is weird even if they have had a resession economically for a long long time.,it is weird.
It is so weird that I sometimes wonder if those who write about it really know the facts.
( But then I think we in the West are so obsessed with sex , and that is also weird…..)
I would presuppose that if we’re talking heterosexual sex, the 20% decline would affect women and men at roughly the same rate… 🙂
I will put money on men being more shy to ask out women these days. Many of my male friends are shy.
Also it seems people work more hours recently with cost of living rising a lot, it was common before for 1 to be breadwinner, 1 to raise kids, but now both parents are usually working which leads to less energy, time, more stress, less sex.
Why do you think men are more shy these days Archy?
Not sure exactly. Could be partly an issue with more reliance on messaging online vs face to face contact to build up the skills required. I have a very basic guess that in the past (from what I am told) there were more things like the local dance hall and a lot of interaction without alcohol between the genders, stoicism also probably pushed men to overcome shyness more to get a date. These days shy men can retreat more to an online “world” of internet chat and get some social contact, whereas before they may have been forced to overcome… Read more »
Hi Jed
Thanks for bringing up this important issue.
I am a bit off point now ,but take a look at this.
The women in internet porn today, has a vulva that only 5% of women have,
http://www.theguardian.com/artanddesign/2015/mar/30/jamie-mccartney-vulva-casts-boulder-colorado-red-tent-revival
If porn affects mens desire and arousal then it must also have the same effect on women?
Women also have erections.
@ Silke
There is a huge increase in the number of women having labiaplasty. I’ve usually heard it attributed to her partner’s porn use or as an indirect result of it. Her partner either prefers a “neat” vagina or he prefers a clean shaven one, which allows her to see her own vagina and then her preference of a “neat” looking vagina causes her to seek labiaplasty. I don’t know how prevalent the belief is, but one woman said it’s ‘supposed” to look like a flower.
I’ve seen thousands of hours of internet porn. No 2 vulvas are alike, video cannot photoshop a vulva. I’ve seen all kinds in porn. Still imagery in glossy magazines tend to be photoshopped for certain countries where the obscenity laws ban “explicit” views of the vulva but a lot of internet imagery doesn’t get photoshopped like that. If you want to see the most realistic bodies, look at video as it’s incredibly expensive to do real-time image manipulation of a 20-60+minute video.
For what it’s worth, as a 21 year old recovering porn addict still finding my way in the social world, I would like to say that it is clear to me beyond any doubt that excessive pornography consumption and masturbation actually *causes* social anxiety. You all are right in pointing out that in many cases a pre-existing social anxiety disorder (which may or may not relate to the growing disconnection between young men and women in a society that is becoming increasingly paranoid about sexual violence) can lead individuals to seek their release in pornography. But the fact that porn… Read more »
I’ve used a lot of porn. I have many male friends who based on their porn stashes have used lots of porn. I don’t have any more social anxiety than I had before. If anything my “vices” have made it easier for me to talk to people. Many of the guys I’m referring to are in relationships or married now. Porn use was a diversion or stop gap. Something to comfort while going through a divorce or building a business when guys didn’t have time or the ability to date. It was fantasy amusement. I don’t doubt what you went… Read more »
John, I’d be willing to bet you are quite a bit older than me, and you didn’t start masturbating to porn at age 11, daily. That’s years and years of daily porn use before even discovering your true sexuality. Someone who was in his twenties when high speed internet porn started to become popular has no clue what kind of effect this addiction could have had on him had he had access to it before puberty. And I’m not saying that all people who use a lot of porn will develop social anxiety. But it is disturbingly common among *young*… Read more »
Socially anxious men probably have less partners, so are more drawn to porn to fill the gaps between intimacy with another (which is how I use it). If you think porn is a problem, that will bias your mind into feeling more n more problems the more you use it. Anxiety probably builds more because this fun activity is quite enticing and the person feels guilty over it causing a spiraling up effect of anxiety. Anxiety is a major cause of erectile dysfunction so there is probably a major issue of feeling like porn is bad and an addiction which… Read more »
Paley, thanks for sharing your experiences. I’ve seen more and more young men who have had similar experiences. We don’t often share personally and I think it is important to recognize the way pornography and masturbation can influence the brain. Clearly, for most people pornography is an aspect of their sexuality that does not cause problems. But for those who experience problems, we need better research and understanding. What concerns me is that readily available, powerful pornography, is available to young people. I remember being a boy of 10 and finding a nature magazine that stimulated my sexual interest. But… Read more »
Oh jesus, I have severe social anxiety and look at porn a lot. It wasn’t jerking off that caused my social anxiety, it was the violence done to me by teachers, other students, and random drunk people. I look at porn a lot because I am single and orgasm helps to mellow out the anxiety. If I am in a relationship, I will be having a lot of sex and if not, then maybe they really aren’t the right partner FOR me. Not once have I ever felt any social anxiety from masturbation or porn usage. Question – The mind… Read more »
It concerns me when we equate sexual performance with sexual desire. It wasn’t that long ago that if he didn’t want it, how did he get an erection was common thinking?
Is social anxiety a result of porn use or is porn use a result of social anxiety? The onus has always been on men to be the initiators, ask women out on dates. There’s also been increasing discussion about consent. We hear statistics like 1 in 5 women will be raped in college alone. Those aren’t stranger rapes. Those are boyfriends, etc. If we reject the notion that half the men are rapists by nature then either they’re misinterpreting or missing something or rape is being defined in over broad terms. We’ve seen a push to punish the accused rather… Read more »
John, Good questions. I think they work hand in hand. Male who haven’t learned good social skills or don’t feel attractive to a sexual partner, often turn to porn for stimulation and relief. Because the internet offers such highly stimulating and varied images 24/7, a guy can get hooked, wanting more and more. This then makes it difficult to have healthy social relationships, since the kind of sexual stimulation he needs to get turned on are often not the kinds that his partner may want to give. Rape and sexual violence have many causes, but I do believe there is… Read more »
Agreed John, I think the focus on porn is missing the point – if people are turning to it as an escape mechanism, then porn’s a symptom – not the problem.
And yes, the old dynamic of putting the expectation of overt rejection on the man is still present in society in some form. Who wouldn’t be tempted by relief where there’s no rejection involved?
How much of the ED related issues are really about the brain and about frequent masturbation instead? On that one people seem very quick to blame the porn without considering confounding factors.
Good point. It isn’t just the porn itself that is addictive, but how much people use, how often its done alone and in isolation. Even the fact that you’re sitting in front of a screen and masturbating can influence how our brains get us hooked on the porn and related environmental and social factors. I’m sure it would be a very different outcome if the porn were read, for instance, not viewed on a screen. Or if it was engaged in with a partner, rather than alone. Even if we felt less shame about our sexual arousal and discussing what… Read more »
As for confounding factors, these are easily eliminated. First, organic causes of ED in men under 40 are very rare (hypogonadism, diabetes, artery disease, etc.). Thus, performance anxiety is most common diagnosis for men under 40. Performance anxiety is easily ruled out by attempting to masturbate without watching porn or recalling porn. Men with porn-induced ED cannot acheive or maintain a good erection without porn. The inability to acheive a good erection without porn is not performance anxiety – as one cannot have performance anxiety with your own hand.
Scarcely that simple. ED may also be a result of stress, overwork, lack of physical fitness, even in men under 40. Most of your other assertions aren’t necessarily true either – there is typically no difference in terms of the physical pressure a guy might apply during masturbation with or without porn, and plenty of guys can at least masturbate to erection and orgasm with or without it. Apart from anything else, if the masturbation is very frequent that in itself may have an effect on sexual performance. I think there’s a seriously messed-up problem here if we’re basically medicalising… Read more »
Actually it is that simple: You are young and healthy and yet cannot achieve an erection without porn, yet can with porn. You postulating scenarios as if the man has amnesia and knows nothing about himself. Each man knows their entire sexual history, and how their erections have been since puberty and how their erections have degrade over the years, and the extent of porn use, along with many other factors. Simple: the man rules out organic causes, and is diagnosed with performance anxiety by a urologist. The man knows this is not so. Attempts to masturbate without porn, and… Read more »
Actually it is that simple: You are young and healthy and yet cannot achieve an erection without porn, yet can with porn. No, it really isn’t that simple. http://www.webmd.com/erectile-dysfunction/guide/why-cant-i-get-an-erection#2 It lists multiple causes of ED, even in young men, and this is no big secret. Please stop oversimplifying this. You postulating scenarios as if the man has amnesia and knows nothing about himself. Each man knows their entire sexual history, and how their erections have been since puberty and how their erections have degrade over the years, and the extent of porn use, along with many other factors. Simple: the… Read more »
“Performance anxiety is easily ruled out by attempting to masturbate without watching porn or recalling porn.”
“recalling porn”? What exactly is meant by that here?
Recalling porn during sex probably.