If you’re a macho dancer who didn’t smile for pictures as a kid, do not get married. It will end badly.
Anneli Rufus at the Daily Beast scoured some marital studies and came up with “15 Signs You’ll Get Divorced.” It’s all steeped in fact, somehow.
High testosterone levels are not a good indicator of a successful marriage. In fact, if your manliness exceeds a certain level, your chances of splitting with your wife increase 43 percent. Women want men more like themselves—to a point.
On the opposite end of the spectrum, dancers and choreographers, I’ve got some bad news for you, too. Whether you’re one or the other, you face a 43.05 percent chance of divorce. Well, at least Mark Madsen’s finally got something going for him.
That is, unless he didn’t smile in pictures as a kid. For those of you who failed to show your teeth back in the day, you’ve increased your chances of getting divorced by five. Anyone thinking about proposing? Check her yearbook photo before you buy the ring.
And from the “least surprising discoveries department,” if you’ve lived with a woman other than your wife, your chances of divorce double. Even if you lived with your wife before the big day, your chances of marital problems increase. That makes living at home sound even better. Wait… no, no it doesn’t.
There is one way to combat this: become an agricultural engineer. It’s not foolproof, but it should work 98.22 percent of the time. If that’s too boring for you, other low-risk jobs like dentistry, farming, ranching, nuclear engineering, or optometry all have low divorce rates.
If you’re the picky type and you want an exciting job with a stable marriage, try extreme sports or professional football. Head injuries yield a 17.1 percent chance of divorce—lower than the national average.
—Ryan O’Hanlon
It doesn’t make much difference. Most marriage are miserable but only 50% end in divorce.
Well…yeah, but that 50% changes depending on the individuals involved…I think that was the main point of the article…
if you think farming is a low-risk job, you don’t know jack about where your food comes from or the lives of the people who produce it. nice journalism, guys. come on down and work the auger with me.
In order words, bring home a whopping paycheck and the chances for marital bliss increase (e.g., “agricultural engineer, dentistry, farming, ranching, nuclear engineering and optometry”).
I can’t comment on the other industries but my father was a successful farmer (and a successful marriage to my mother). And growing up in a farming community, many farmers tend to be real down to earth, salt of the earth types that have repect for the land , a tremendous work ethic and respect for family.