So I know that some readers will not appreciate this. But as a mother, I don’t enjoy it either.
Here goes nothing, why do men treat parenting as a chore?
So you get home from work, and you don’t feel like having to play with the kids or help with homework. All you want to do when you get home is grab a beer turn on the TV and tune everything out.
Help with dinner or cook dinner: Chore
Help Jimmy with math: Chore
Watch little Christine while mom takes a break to go to the bathroom: Chore
Play with your offspring: Chore
Clean up after dinner: Chore
Change diaper: Chore
Watch them for a couple of hours: Chore
This list could go on and on. And listen, I know women that think this way too, but—perhaps because society reinforces their role as nurturing parents—it is my experience there are fewer with the ‘chore’ mentality for parenting as a whole.
I witnessed this first hand when I was growing up. My brother and I were the chores (the inconvenience). The idea that mom would go to the grocery store with two Irish twins(born within a year of each other) in tow is insane if there is another option. My dad thought it was the end of the world that he had to keep us alive for a couple of hours. When what really happened is he watched TV and made us watch it too. We even had to deliver him Dr. Pepper like little servants. Thank when mom returned he’d complain about it(all while not helping her unpack the groceries).
I’ve personally seen this with my husband when we got a dog. “He’s your dog, can’t you bring him out?” all while I’m cooking dinner for four people. And now that we are adoptive parents nothing has changed. It’s always a chore if it isn’t his first choice, which is someone else doing it all.
So why do you have kids? Did you know that you would treat them like a chore? Or were you hoping all along for someone else to do all the lifting?
Instead of thinking its a chore, chose to play. Choose the experience. Your children will not stay this young or appreciate you more than in this period in their lives.
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About Christine Bofenkamp
I am Murphy’s law in action (if you doubt that, ask my husband). I like to say I'm a classy lady when in reality I put on red lipstick and run around in my pajamas. I’m a parent to a teen, wife to an exceptional husband and dog mom to two unruly doods (Rumple and Rosie). I try to swear less, sometimes this cannot be avoided, and captain cuss word shows up (this usually occurs directly after Murphy's law has kicked in, it's a vicious circle).
