My son hated trucks. Dinosaurs collected dust. Footballs languished in the bottom of the toy bin. During the Super Bowl, my spouse found himself in the middle of a tea party with six Barbie dolls my son had brought over to share. My daughter, on the other hand, liked baby dolls. The teacher of her infant classroom once told me my girl liked to play WWF wrestling with the dolls, throwing them, banging them on the floor, and then hugging them.
I didn’t worry if they did or didn’t like the toys society assigned to their gender. I was an early childhood educator for seventeen years, so I knew that children learn from all sorts of toys. I encouraged them to explore their interests. But it made it difficult for me to buy gifts, both for my own children and other parents’ children. I never could (and never wanted to) go to the generalized list of “if it’s a boy, buy him a truck, if it’s a girl, get a doll.”
Over the years I made myself a promise to buy certain things from my children’s Christmas or birthday idea list, but to form my own list of toys that haven’t been assigned a place in society the way trucks and dolls are.
The biggest factors on my list are whether or not I could give it to any child for their birthday (because some children do conform to gender norms and like to play with the toys “assigned” to their gender); what skills it helps develop; and whether or not it is fun!
Here are my top 9 gender-inclusive gifts for kids, guaranteed to make you loved by all:
- Legos My number one gift, Legos teach the mind to work to problem solve, they are great for fine motor skills, and they come in a wide variety of colors. You can use your imagination to make anything you want! They also come in larger pieces for younger children who need a little more fine motor development.
- Playdough A sensory soother, playdough is soft and comes in a plethora of colors, letting a child use their imagination to create animals, bracelets, people, and a whole slew of other fun things. It’s also great for fine motor skills as your child rolls, pulls, and molds the doughy substance.
- Books There are many great books that don’t focus on any particular gender, and they often top my list because they are fun, educational, and help with literacy skills.
- K’Nex Like Legos, K’nex let your child build in new and creative ways. Similar in function but vastly different in how they attach, K’Nex are great for children who are a little older and want to build something unique. K’Nex help with fine motor skills as well as help develop problem-solving skills. This set is a little pricey for me, but I think it’s worth it for the finished product.
- Art Kits, like this one, allow your child to express themselves and develop fine motor skills in the process.
- Lite Brite This one is a classic, and every kid I know loves it. Yes, it has a lot of small pieces, so it’s not suitable for children under three, but who doesn’t love designing a picture with little light up pegs? This develops fine motor skills such as hand-eye coordination, and it’s fun!
- Slime! Every kid I know loves slime. But fair warning, not every parent I know loves slime! It’s an excellent sensory activity, though, and there are so many fun slime accessories.
- Board Games For older children, board games can be a fun way to interact with the family, building social skills, plus some develop specific skills, like Monopoly, which is great for both literacy and math. One of my favorite board games is Betrayal at House on the Hill, which is a strategy game that encourages out of the box thinking.
- Science Kits Another great one for older children, science kits like this National Geographic geode kit allow for exploration and learning about the natural world.
That’s my top 9…feel free to drop any other suggestions in the comments!
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This post is republished on Medium.
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