Signs You’re His One That Got Away

Almost everyone has that one person they wish they’d treated better — the one they regret losing, the one who makes them wonder “what if.”

That’s what people mean when they say someone is the one that got away.

The phrase actually started as a fisherman’s joke (“you should’ve seen the one that got away!”), but in love, it describes the person who slipped through someone’s fingers, leaving behind a lifetime of “what could’ve been.”

For men, realizing they let go of a good woman is a mistake that tends to stick with them.

Maybe he didn’t appreciate you, maybe he took you for granted, or maybe he thought he could do better … until he realized he couldn’t.

If you’ve ever wondered whether you’re the woman he still regrets losing, here are reassuring signs that you really are the one that got away.

Here are 7 comforting signs that you are his ‘one that got away’:

1. He remembers how well you treated him

You always made a point of trying to please him, shower him with gifts, and lift him up. He, on the other hand, treated you badly. Maybe controlling you, making you feel worthless, or ignoring you.

Chances are that when he looks back in a couple of years, he’ll realize what he left behind — nearly 77 percent of men who initiated a breakup say they regret it within two months.

2. You’ve heard his new partner treats him badly

As messed up as it is to say, having someone treat you the way you treated your ex can give you a reality check about what you may have lost in the past.

It stings when the person he left you for makes him feel the same way he once treated you — and it’s often the reality check that makes him realize you’re the one that got away.

3. He looks for excuses to stay in your orbit

A man who really regrets what he’s done to you will often try to come up with an excuse to stay in your presence. He suddenly “needs” to talk or has random reasons to reach out, all so he can still be around you.

He may actively try to come up with a reason why you two need to talk. In fact, in about one-third of on-again/off-again cases, it’s the guy — the dumper — who reaches back out first. Make no mistake about it, he’s trying to get back in your good graces, but might be too ashamed to admit it.

4. His friends say he’s miserable without you.

When guys who have pride issues are dealing with the fallout of making a mistake like dumping a good woman, they may enlist the help of friends to convey everything to you.

Why? Because they’re too embarrassed yet prideful to admit they did wrong, so they’re hoping you will go back to them.

5. He eventually admits he was wrong

Most of the time, it takes a while for the loss to sink in. If he’s calling you up and telling you he was wrong, he probably regrets losing you or the resources you had at your disposal.

Even if he does this, you probably shouldn’t take him back. Who’s to say he won’t take you for granted again?

6. He stays single for years

Guys who are totally hung up on an ex tend to stay single for years after they break up with them.

If he’s still not attached after a year, two years, or more, you might be someone he’ll never fully get over.

About half of people enter a new relationship within 20 months, and it can take years for emotional attachment to fade.

7. His life went downhill after you

A lot of guys, in a moment of bravado or stupidity, will dump good women when they feel like they’re going to go places. Of course, most guys who do this end up realizing that they just left a girl who liked them when the chips were down.

Most guys who have their lives fall apart will crawl back to the ones who had their back when things weren’t quite as sweet.

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This post was previously published on medium.com.