The Hidden Challenges of Dating the Hottest Women in the World

Ever wonder what it’s like to date someone with supermodel looks, or any woman who might be considered being in the top ten percent of conventionally attractive people?

I’m talking about women who could easily — and successfully — make a living based off their looks in some capacity. I’m talking about those women who turn heads everywhere they go, the ones who are as hot as the celebrities that people fantasize about.

Of the many women I have dated, a number of them fell into this category of “unbelievably hot.”

I noticed a few patterns about them that not many people talk about:

1. They suck at texting 💬

Imagine you’re a hot girl. Every dude you’ve ever been in contact with is trying to shoot his shot in your DMs. You have more than 3,000 unchecked text messages, and double that amount of unchecked messages in WhatsApp and Instagram. The number of unchecked messages on the dating apps is expressed in scientific notation.

There is absolutely no hope of you ever responding to all of these messages even if you developed advanced medical technology to double your lifespan, resulting in you receiving a Nobel Prize in Physiology or Medicine.

I’ve noticed that, the hotter the girl, the less likely you’ll be able to have a sustained, meaningful conversation with her over any sort of texting medium. There’s just too much noise in their texting apps.

The solution? You need to call. This one was a little tough for me at first because I’m an introvert who strongly prefers texting over calling, but it’s a small price to pay to date someone who’s so beautiful that she can give you a heart attack whenever you just look at her face.

2. Their politics are weird 🫏🐘

The hottest women have a strange mix of political attitudes. Some of them tend to be a bit more performatively conservative compared to their general-population counterparts. It’s as if they’ve mastered an outwardly adaptive visage through interacting with countless insufferable conservative men.

I’ve seen them shirking the word “feminism” as if it’s a dirty word. It can seem unclear whether that outer representation is sincere or not.

However, there isn’t a woman in the world who doesn’t feel in her heart of hearts that she deserves to be treated like a human being, so there will always be at least a tinge of feminist (liberal/leftist) hope in her soul, even if she isn’t aware of what that’s called.

Women from this group who either hold onto or develop an above-average sense of self-empowerment will generally lean unapologetically left. Emily Ratajkowski publicly endorsed Bernie Sanders with fervor during his presidential bids, after all. It’s pretty rare for any of these hotties to hold any political views that could be seen as extreme or radical on either side of the aisle, though.

So, as long as you hold onto political views based in empathy rather than hierarchical oppression, having relationships with these women can be more authentic and harmonious, even if you don’t use standard political labels.

Note that I am not including blatantly narcissistic women in my sample. I avoid narcissists, no matter how hot they are. I am aware that people with antisocial personality disorder will be more inclined to hold unempathetic political views. Learned that the hard way!

3. Their beautification efforts are rooted in insecurity 💄

The hottest of the hot got hot because they put in tons of effort into becoming hot. They know everything there is to know about makeup, skincare, fashion trends, dieting, fitness, and cosmetic procedures.

They may appear confident but, compared to the general population, they can be deeply insecure about how other people think of them and their appearance.

In that way, they’re a lot like me. I spent my entire life obsessing over the topics of dating, women, seduction, attraction, and female psychology because of initially being incredibly desperate to be loved by women.

Through my journey, I learned to let go of desperation and become the most confident version of myself when it comes to relationships. I know I said that these women “may appear” confident, but many of them actually developed real confidence and perseverance through their tireless self-improvement efforts, and that’s something to be admired and respected. Don’t think of them as dumb bimbos who only have looks. There’s depth to them, too.

The challenge that comes with dating women who care so much about their appearance is that you’re going to be waiting forever for them to get ready to go out to even the most casual outings. Just deal with it.

4. They’re not as scary or intimidating as you might expect 👹

The stereotypical “hot girl” you see in Hollywood movies is the head cheerleader who bullies everyone in high school. She’s mean, entitled, and extremely judgmental.

The hottest women in real life, however, are often really, really sweet. They mastered good manners to look good in any social situation, so they know how to be sweet in a fake way, but they tend to be genuinely kind and compassionate as well.

This makes total sense if you think about evolutionary theory. It has been theorized that altruism resulted from human evolution, that human beings who behave altruistically are more likely to survive and pass on their genes because they find themselves in more supportive communities that develop their strength in numbers. This is analogous to us on an individual level: the “mean girl” from those Hollywood movies would eventually be shunned and ostracized by social circles in the long term, and altruistic people will attract more support.

Hot women learn pretty quickly that the social admiration they garner as a result of their hotness eventually places more social responsibility on their shoulders, and being altruistic and compassionate is the best adaptation when that happens.

If you have a lot of experience approaching women, you may have noticed that the rudest ones who like to hurt your feelings generally aren’t that hot. If you start talking to the ones who really stand out from the crowd, you might be pleasantly surprised at how pleasant their personalities are, too.

5. In all of the most important ways, they’re just like you and me 🤝

Different groups of people can have wildly different experiences that affect their beliefs and attitudes in significant ways. Those who grew up in poverty might have different moral adaptations than those who grew up in abundance. You might think of yourself as a not-hot man who ended up being extremely different from a hot woman.

However, once you hang out with anyone from a different group enough, you start realizing that there are more things that tie us together as humans than there are differences. Use this truth to free yourself from any potential intimidation you might feel from the prospect of approaching and befriending anyone.

No matter who you are, we all have similar hopes and fears.

“We all want the same things. We all want love. We all feel pain and compassion. We get disappointed when things don’t go our way, and we feel a sense of accomplishment when they do. Focusing on our similarities rather than our differences has a lot of benefits not just in regards to seduction, but to socialization and psychological health as well.”

— Excerpt from Never Lonely: The Uncensored Guide on How to Attract and Be Loved by Women

It’s easy to feel like it’s a challenge to get close to extremely attractive women, thinking that they might turn their backs to you because of how different you are from them. However, they’re just as likely to respond positively to universal signals of human togetherness as you and me.

Try not to think of these super hotties as an elusive different species. In the end, we’re all in this together.

How did I end up dating these kinds of women?

Is it because I’m just as hot as them? Hell no. I’m a short guy standing at just 5’5″ and I’m Asian (regarded by many Americans as the least attractive ethnicity for a man).

Anybody can do what I did.

How? If I had to simplify it into a formula, I’ll call it The 3 A’s of dating the hottest of the hottest:

Access
Ability
Abundance

1. Access

If you want to date models and bombshells, you need to be able to meet them in the first place. This will be very difficult if you live in the middle of nowhere and have exactly two friends who were homeschooled along with you.

Getting access to the social circles of the hottest women in the world may seem like an insurmountable challenge, but it’s very possible for anyone motivated enough.

You need to live in a major metropolitan city, or at least be able to visit the closest one on a semi-regular basis. You then need to practice a basic level of social skills until you’re consistently able to make new friends.

Anyone can do this. I first started um… let’s say “infiltrating” the social circles of models and other very good-looking people by befriending the right kinds of men: very good-looking men, men who had status and wealth, and men who had great “game.”

You can find all kinds of dudes like this if you go out and socialize enough. I met them in bars, in clubs, through events, through communities, etc. Men are also very easy to befriend. Just make them feel good about themselves in some way.

They’re compliment-starved, even if people suck up to them all the time. Just look at people like Elon Musk and Donald Trump. They have all the money and power in the world, but it’s obvious that no one truly loves and accepts them. The sycophants orbiting them may constantly sing their praises, but they’re empty praises that leave those men constantly hungry for actual substance.

Show these kinds of men any semblance of sincere humanity and understanding, and they’ll welcome you into their circles with open arms.

I’m not saying that you need to befriend men who lack self-awareness and morality. There are plenty of open-minded, kind-hearted men who also fit these categories, and hopefully you will find them. It’s still easy to befriend them, though, because everyone wants to feel appreciated and admired. Practice giving appreciation and admiration without being a spineless doormat, and people will love you for it.

The first time one of these male friends of mine brought over a stunning Brazilian model to a hangout we were having, I was already with four other female friends. Having a healthy amount of female friends, no matter what they look like, will make you seem “safe” and not creepy to other women. I was able to befriend that model very quickly and eventually became even closer to her than the male friend who brought her. This helped me to meet her other model friends.

Access is all about utilizing your social skills. So, get out there and develop them as much as possible.

2. Ability

Incels who have never even held hands with a woman will argue with me about this to the moon and back, but all you really need in order to make women feel attracted to you is this little thing called “game.” Kids are calling it “rizz” these days. Our forefathers called it “being a gentleman,” though the tech was less refined:

This Is Why We Need “Game” to Date Women
How society makes it really f**king hard for men to find love
medium.com

Even if you’re a 5’5″ Asian guy like me, you can make up for any perceived deficits with good enough of an ability to make women swoon with your words, actions, and emotional projections.

I’ll admit that being good-looking can help, being rich can help, being tall can help, being fit can help, etc. However, none of these are absolutely required for you to find love in the arms of the women you are most attracted to.

Women’s attraction generally works differently from that of men. You need to learn how to take advantages of these differences. Learning that kind of skill is the only thing that’s actually required in the dance of seduction.

Guides like my book, Never Lonely: The Uncensored Guide on How to Attract and Be Loved by Women, are chock full of information on how to learn these kinds of skills. Pioneers in seduction have been around for decades, constantly testing what works and what doesn’t, and reporting their findings online.

These aren’t closely guarded secrets anymore. The information is very available these days. If you want to learn how to level up your Ability, you can. There’s no excuse not to.

3. Abundance

This “A” is just as important as the other two, and just as achievable.

It’s about adopting an abundance mentality, preventing a scarcity mentality from making you weird and creepy:

It’s about making an abundance of friends, creating a network of support:

It’s about building an abundance of women in all aspects of your life:

I believe the entire point of all this is love. And it is only through Abundance can love truly flourish.

Regardless of whether you want to experience the thrill of dating super hot models, or you just want to spark some chemistry and get physical with that cutie in your Physical Chemistry class, in the end, what matters most is love.

Your mission on this planet isn’t to just take from others. Whatever it is, it’s going to involve love in some form or another. And that love needs to be shared in abundance, for that’s the only way we can make our dark world just a little bit brighter.

Have you ever dated someone totally different from you? Tell me your experiences in the comments!

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This post was previously published on medium.com.

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