
Whenever I’m scrolling on Instagram and come across those street interviews, one of the most common question that’s asked is “Who should pay on the first date?”
Most women say the man should pay.
Some men say that the man should pay.
Some men say they should go 50:50.
And some women also say they should go 50/50. (They get called pick me by the way).
And the comment section is usually split in half with men calling women gold diggers and the women calling them broke.
So What Is The Right Way?
There’s no straight answer to this. But first, let’s talk about the two popular opinions and then I’ll share my personal view.
1. Men Should Pay For The First Date
The women who want the man to pay on the first date do this because they want a man who “protects and provides”.
So from the very first date onwards, they filter out men who do not automatically reach for the bill whenever they are together.
These women also feel that men and women can never really be 50/50 because at the end of the day, women will still end up doing a bigger chunk of the housework. They will be the ones birthing and raising their kid. So the least a man can do is pick up the bills. Fair.
Last but not the least, a lot of women also want to stick to the traditional way of dating where the man courts the woman and hence invests into her.
2. You Should Go 50/50
The other opinion is that you should go 50/50 on the first day.
A lot of men think that women use dates as a ticket to a free meal, which is not entirely a lie, especially when you are dating in your 20s. They want to ensure that the woman is actually into them and not just the meal.
Some men also feel that unless they have something serious going on, there’s no point in investing in that person. Fair again.
My Take On This
In my personal opinion, the first should be 50/50. I don’t care if I get called a pick-me because I have a very good reason for this.
Dating is hard. You often have to go out on multiple dates in a year if you want to find someone you can actually connect with. So at a stage when the two of you don’t even know each very well and there’s no guarantee if you’ll meet again, its unfair to make one party bear all the expenses.
If I get serious with someone, I will definitely let my man spend on me. But until then, I am picking my own tab.
What do you think about this? Let me know in the comments below!
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This post was previously published on medium.com.
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Photo credit: René Ranisch on Unsplash

