Women, Sex Gets Better With Age!

I get so sad when I speak with women friends in their 60’s and 70’s who say they are not interested in sex any longer.

But…

I get very happy when I speak with women friends in their 60’s and 70’s who say they are very interested in sex and are having great sex! Plus they report they are multi-orgasmic! Even better.

As for me, I am not a late bloomer.

Sex was always important to me.

But I like it a whole lot more now.

And I am well into my 60’s.

Being older is the time for sexual feasting.

Not only do I not need to worry about pregnancy, or my off-the-charts high work-life imbalance stress levels, or menopause-related challenges curbing my bedroom desires, or relationship issues with my former partner, but now I relish and prioritize time for sex.

Now I know what I like and what I dislike.

Now I know well my own patterns of arousal.

Now I focus on pleasure and don’t worry about performance.

I am no longer afraid to say what I want.

I no longer put a man’s sexual satisfaction above my own.

I seem to have an embarrassment of riches, if you get my drift, in terms of choices.

Here are my bottom lines:

There are some things that don’t work for me sexually and I am very clear about not messing with them.

For instance, I do not like to go to bed at the end of a long, tiring day and be reached for with the expectation of sex.

Sex that is perfunctory, lacking in connection, is a soporific. I don’t bother.

Nor do I enjoy transactional sex; if I am sharing myself intimately with someone, they better treat me very, very well.

I do not like only a steady diet of vanilla sex and am easily bored in the mattress magic department. Been there, done that, in 31 years of two, long term relationships.

If a partner is not tuned into sensual, erotic touch, I am out of there.

I happily welcome sexual approaches that are attuned, sensual, erotic, playful and fearless about the real differences in female sexual responses.

I like to have a whole bunch of partnered sexual activity in a concentrated period of time- like 24–48 hours and then none for 1–2 weeks, subsidized by masturbation.

I need to feel a strong interpersonal connection, aka attraction and good energy with the other person.

Variety is not only spice of life, but a very real requirement when it comes to sex. I like creative, sexual playfulness, including energetic and kinky sex.

I require an erotic environment that includes tons of open communication and acceptance of any and all sexual desires, grounded in mutual consent.

I like a light-hearted approach to sexual play; after all some awkwardness and smells and sounds and bodily fluids can be kinda weird.

I prefer the terms ‘receptive’ rather than submissive, and ‘open’ over ENM (ethically non-monogamous); ‘in control’ is a better term than dominant and I like the word kinky better than BDSM.

I am religious about avoiding STI/STDs.

I love reaching the point of satiety after multiple orgasms over a day or two or three.

Sexual love is a powerful elixir and can be a gateway to an authentic love relationship and should be respected. Having a great boyfriend helps all this. Thanks babe.

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This post was previously published on medium.com.

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