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There are self-help guides for everything from losing weight to saving a marriage. Could there be one for uniting a divided nation?
According to data reported in the Library Journal, over 85,000 self-help books have been published over the years, and millions of them purchased annually. Many are focused on diet and exercise, spiritual wellbeing, becoming a “better version” of yourself, making your relationships work. Many more are all about succeeding in business, becoming a better leader, getting rich. Apparently, there are riches to be had in the world of self-help publishing.
Is it Broken? Go to YouTube.
It seems there’s nothing that can’t be fixed. Broken bicycle chain? No problem. There are literally hundreds of YouTube tutorials showing you how to fix, untangle, or refasten a bike chain. Broken heart? Not to worry. You’ll find plenty of videos from “experts” showing you how to repair and restore your fractured relationship.
What about a Broken Country?
If we think about the divisions in our country right now, from the political divides to the cultural upheaval, one might imagine we’re living in a nation on the brink of a breakup. It’s not all of us who are contributors, of course, but we’re all affected by the hostile language and ridicule tossed like spitballs at those with different views and different beliefs.
Here’s an analogy: Your entire body might be fit and healthy, but if you have a toothache, that’s pretty much all you’re going to be thinking about. So, back to the loud minority. In many cases, the ones we elected to lead us contribute more than their share to this condition, tossing out memorable sound bites rather than efforts at reconciliation.
An Addiction Problem?
It’s been at least two decades since political and cultural “warfare” among our country’s citizens and politicians has been heating up. We might point to certain inflammatory commentators as part of the cause. We might also think about the evolution of the uses of social media as another factor. The proliferation of groups on the far right, the far left, or just angry-at-the-world; places where hostility toward other groups or individuals finds sympathetic members who come to hear their beliefs and prejudices reinforced. For those folks, there’s little interest in understanding what those “others” are thinking, or the reasons they believe in what they do. And for the rest of us, the headlines tell us “we’ve never been so divided as a country.”
We need to ask ourselves, Have we just grown so used to the way things are that we assume they won’t change? Have we become unknowingly addicted to the negativity, the name-calling, the pigeon-holing of “red states” v “blue states,” conservative v liberal, races and ethnicities in opposition? Are we suffering from some unseen virus of the spirit that’s hurt our sense of national optimism, our neighborliness?
A Self-Help Plan for an Entire Country
According to the most recent data from the U. S. Census Bureau, there are over 334 million people living in this country. And the total number of registered voters is about half of that population.
Imagine getting that many people, of so many different backgrounds and beliefs, on some kind of wellness “program” for the entire nation. John Lennon wrote the memorable song “Imagine,” filled with a pretty ambitious wishlist of hopes for a better world. So, let’s not be afraid to try.
We might start with a five-step plan for reducing the divisiveness in our politics and working toward building a more United States of America.
· Step 1: Acknowledge the problem. The first step in virtually every recovery program requires the realization that there is a problem, and then the individual or group must have the desire and the will to beat that problem and become healthy again. We can do that—all of us who are feeling the stressful impact of the hostility and divisiveness and dream of a time when we can feel like “One Nation” again.
· Step 2: Listen to the ones we disagree with. Are we spending too much time talking to ourselves? Socializing only with those we agree with? Taking our news and opinion only from the sources that align with our own beliefs? That’s how we cultivate anger and distrust of those “others.” But those other folks are our neighbors, too. Citizens of our great, diverse nation. We need to open our minds and try to understand their perspectives—we have far more in common with each other than we might think.
· Step 3: Get involved in community and country. We live in a democracy, and working democracies require the participation of the citizens. Our leaders are the ones we elected! In the past 25 years, less than 30% of registered voters have voted in primary elections. Not good. But if we needed additional motivation to show up and vote here it is: multiple studies have shown that voting results a greater sense of self-esteem and self-identity, a reduction in stress and anxiety, a sense of civic duty and pride, and feelings of empowerment. The same benefits are true of participation in community activities and volunteer work. Let’s go!
· Step 4: Change the Electoral College. One thing that can diminish the satisfaction that should come with voting is feeling that your vote doesn’t count. Our system of electing a president of the United States is practically designed to give tens of millions of voters that feeling, because in all but two states, Maine and Nebraska, it’s a winner-take-all game for the electoral votes. A candidate may win the popular vote in a particular state by a mere 2%, yet still receive 100% of that state’s electoral votes. That leaves millions of people feeling disenfranchised, contributing to both apathy and hostility toward the system. Let’s fix that.
· Step 5: Demand better leadership from our leaders. A great deal of the divisiveness and hostility we feel is fueled by the rhetoric and finger-pointing of our elected leaders. They must be reminded that we elected them to serve the entire population of their communities, their states, and their country, not simply the ones who voted for them. The challenging part here is mentioned above; we have to start participating in the process early, making our voices heard so that in those primary elections the candidates understand that their messages must resonate with all the voters, not just their base.
Where There’s a Will…
Of course, there are more steps that could be added to this list for the recovery of our national spirit. These are just a few of what might be called the obvious ones, with maybe the most important being: Acknowledging the problem and having the will—and willingness—to improve the state of our union.
Lyle Greenfield is a man of many experiences. He’s worked in landscaping, construction, door-to-door sales, and a brewery before starting his career as a copywriter in NYC. Greenfield has served as president of the Long Island Wine Council, started a music production company in New York, is a founding member and former president of the Association of Music Producers (AMP). Greenfield is the author of several books including Uniting the States of America: A Self-Care Plan for a Wounded Nation, which was written with the goal of finding solutions for the current state of political divisiveness in our country. Learn more at lylejgreenfield.com.
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Lyle Greenfield has never been one to do or say whatever everybody else is doing. An original thinker – but one who cares about others – he has always seen what others haven’t…yet. This is no exception.