Maybe you already heard about this and maybe you didn’t. Either way, I’m going to give you the short version. Cincinnati Reds pitcher Mike Leake was arrested on Monday after stealing six American Rag shirts from his local Macy’s. The shirts had a total value of $59.98.
While I don’t condone the stealing, I do give the guy props for being a smart shopper. Why buy the high dollar shit when you can get steal nice t-shirts on sale, right? I know you only make $425,000 a year, Mikey and I think it’s great that you’re trying to not live beyond your means.
I’m not sure if he’s looking for a girlfriend, but maybe he could hook up with Winona Ryder. She might be crazy, but she is still Cougar-licious. Considering he’s only 23, that would make her a cougar with an extra helping of grrrrrrrrrrr!!! Yummy.
Anyway, back to douche nozzle. Is dude so hard up that he has to swipe a six pack of shirts? Seriously. He makes enough scratch. Dude can afford $60 for some shirts. I wonder what colors he picked out? I hope he didn’t get an orange one. Chances are the county will hook him up with some orange clothes,
Speaking of orange…I just now made the connection that the Philadelphia Flyers are orange and so are prison jump suits. That’s why I hate the Flyers. It has nothing to do with Glass-jaw Lindros after all. Somehow I never made the connection. My favorite hockey moment has to be Lindros getting a chin-eye view of Scott Stevens shoulder. Stevens dropped Lindros like a bag of trash on garbage night Back to the blog post…
I don’t get shit like this. I’m barely making $425 a week right now, but if I needed some shirts, I think I could find the register at Macy’s, ya know? It’s not that hard to do bro. Walk up to the register (without removing the price tags first) and whip out a Benjamin or some plastic to pay for your gear. If it doesn’t say Reds on it, chances are you have to pay for it.
Are we seriously so messed up as a society that our professional athletes are being reduced to lifting inexpensive clothing? Is that what we have to look forward to now that the steroid problems seem to be behind us? I think I prefer laughing at guys with small sacks and humongous heads.
I know steroids aren’t funny, but when I dude’s head grows and his nuts shrink, and he is doing it to himself, that IS funny. Really funny as a matter of fact.
All I know is that this guy looks like an idiot. The Cincinnati Reds must be tickled pink to have him on their roster. I know if this was the 70’s and 80’s that Marge Schott would be proud.
P.S. Marge Schott was the racist owner of the Reds until MLB forced her to give up the team. That chick put the ash in White Trash. Below you will see a clip of my favorite hockey moment. Take a second and watch the replay of the hit. It zooms in closer.