Debra Johnson writes a guestpost to share her experiences online dating. Trust your instincts, folks.
Note: I spent a few months online dating with a large and very popular online dating site. After many dates and endless searching, I ended up finding someone offline. I am not sure if it’s the time of the year or long overdue baby fever but many of my male and female friends have embarked into the fascinating world of online dating, so here are ten things to give them a heads up:
- Restaurants: You really never know how big and awesome your city is until you start online dating. Online dating opens many restaurant doors to you and your food palette. Typically both sides of the date know a new fun hole in the wall that the other doesn’t know about.
- Lies: Men are typically one to two inches shorter than they say online and women are about five to ten pounds heavy than their profile pictures. Keep in mind that when a male says he is a certain height, knock off a few inches and don’t be surprised when your lady date shows up a tad heavier than the photo. Everyone does it, just be prepared.
- Picture Perfect: Women will post the crème de le crème photos online. I guarantee you that you will not see any bad photos of them online, they will have their hair and makeup perfected and outfits picked out to perfection. Men tend to post photos without thinking, for example photos of themselves with a good looking female. We get it boys; we know you are wanted and that just because you are online dating doesn’t mean you aren’t wanted.
- Funny or Not: There were several instances where a match was hysterical and had me laughing through email and messages. Then I was sincerely let down when my dates were awkward and made terrible jokes. It is very rare that the person who is funny on paper is not as funny in person.
- Drinker: Beware of the alcoholics. Most dating sites don’t really allow you to explain your drinking habits. The ‘occasional drinker’ translates to I only drink Thursdays-Sundays. That’s not occasional that’s almost daily.
- Men are easy: Not in that way, get your mind out of the gutter. Men are more open minded and come with less guidelines and rules that women tend to have. Women have a ‘must have’ list and don’t want to break it; luckily there are men who are more relaxed and accepting. Women take note.
- Roomies: Warning flag, if he or she mentions that their ‘roomies’ have cats, their roomie is most likely their parents. This happened not once, but twice. Seriously.
- Work status: Be careful of the words ‘entrepreneur’ or ‘in between jobs’. You may want to request a resume if you these two words appear in a dating profile.
- Just say no: It’s okay to say no to a date or a second date. In online dating, people tend to think they have to be ‘nice’ and give everyone a chance. Lie. You don’t have to do anything you don’t want.
- Trust: Trust your gut. If you gut tells you yes, go for it. If it tells you something doesn’t seem right, then your gut is most likely right. Always trust your feelings.