Why do we feel the need to pass judgement on certain types of consensual sex between adults?
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Since its inception in 2003, December 17 has been the “International Day to End Violence Against Sex Workers.”
This originally began as a candlelight vigil to honor the seventy-one women slain by Gary Ridgway. The notorious Green River Killer who preyed on full-service sex workers in the Seattle and Portland area during the 80’s and 90’s.
Sex workers face a very unfair stigmatization by society, and a mountain of hypocrisy.
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By his own admission, Ridgway specifically targeted sex workers because of his disdain for them. When some of their bodies were found, society shrugged off the stories of murdered prostitutes. He knew most people wouldn’t really care.
He was wrong. I am one of the people who care.
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Ours, as well as other societies around the world, hold an outlook of contempt for sexworkers. To be clear, “sex work” is vastly different from “sex trafficking”. One is a chosen profession in which sex acts or sexual entertainment is exchanged for money. Sex trafficking is rape and enslavement, by force, fear, and coercion.
Over the course of my life, I have known many friends who have made a living as sex workers, and every one of them is opposed to trafficking, and understands the difference.
“Sex work” is an umbrella term, that includes, but is not limited to: strippers, escorts, adult film stars, and sensual masseuses. Some of these types of work are criminalized in many areas, and all are subject to unfair vilification.
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Yet, Koppenhaver’s defense attorney declared that porn stars cannot be raped, due to the nature of their profession.
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Sex workers face a very unfair stigmatization by society, as well as a mountain of hypocrisy.Their services have always been in demand, yet they are treated as subhuman. In movies and television, sex workers are often portrayed as either naïve victims of a corrupt and cruel lifestyle, or as devious and untrustworthy.
This kind of stereotyping of sex workers is tantamount to the stereotyping of any group of people. It desensitizes society to any real suffering, and leaves the door open for dismissal of violence committed against that particular group. “Dead hooker” jokes are as disgusting as rape, racist, and ableist jokes.
One example of violence against sex workers currently in the news is the MMA fighter Jon Koppenhaver case. His former girlfriend, adult film performer Christy Mackinaye, survived a brutal beating, rape and torture, and escaped death by climbing out of a window and running naked to a neighbor’s door. Yet, Koppenhaver’s defense attorney declared that porn stars cannot be raped, due to the nature of their profession. This is an absolutely detestable way to look at another human being. Condoning violence against anyone because they are in a sexual profession, negates any supposed moral high ground someone would claim to stand on.
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The police know these individuals do not have the same voice or resources as the rest of society.
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When a sex worker is attacked, they do not have the same options or resources as most individuals. If they go to the police, their story is either disbelieved, or they are met with an attitude of, “Oh well, occupational hazard.” Facing arrest and being fined is another reason sex workers are reluctant to report attacks. Then, add the reality of police officers having victimized sex workers far too often. The police know these individuals do not have the same voice or resources as the rest of society.
Too many Americans maintain a bizarrely hypocritical outlook on sex in general. Most everyone desires sex, yet we are taught that it is somehow inherently “bad” or “wrong”. This, in turn, is projected on to sex workers.
We are incredibly mixed up about sex as a society. However, there are two words which should be used as boundaries for clearing up any problems in regards to human sexuality: consenting adults.
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Who can decide what is immoral between two consenting adults? Sexual desire is something that nearly each human is born with. Isn’t it time to allow sex work to come out of the shadows, and shed off the centuries of bigotry and falsehoods that have been thrown upon the profession? Sex IS a commodity like anything else bought, sold, bartered or traded.
Couldn’t we all improve our social condition if we destigmatized consensual sex between adults? Violence against sex workers can be prevented. We can create a social environment where someone like Gary Ridgway can’t exist. We can begin to understand individuals. We can treat people as people. Let’s step up and speak out for the rights of sex workers.
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Photo: Getty Images