This Open Thread has been brought to you by Joseph Gordon-Levitt in lingerie.
About ozyfrantzOzy Frantz is a student at a well-respected Hippie College in the United States. Zie bases most of zir life decisions on Good Omens by Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman, and identifies more closely with Pinkie Pie than is probably necessary. Ozy can be contacted at ozyfrantz@gmail.com or on Twitter as @ozyfrantz. Writing is presently Ozy's primary means of support, so to tip the blogger, click here.
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I was gonna say things, but now I’m distracted. D:
My dad would rather go boating than spend Father’s Day with me even though this’ll probably be the last one that I’ll be in the same country for. I guess lunch is good enough?
It’s his choice. My dad’s going on a week-long camping trip that includes Father’s day. Is there any way you could go boating with him?
I guess, and no because it’s a multiple-day thing.
Context ruins everything.
Yeah I know how you feel. I went to visit my dad this weekend. Got there Friday afternoon and got back in earlier this afternoon. Here’s how the weekend went:
Get in Friday afternoon and he’s at his part time job (8:30am – 3pm)
Friday evening he goes off to his main job (leaves at 4:45 to get there and work 6pm to 6am)
Gets back in Sat. morning about 6:30am
Goes to his part time Sat. morning around 8:30am-3pm
Goes to his main job at around (same time range as above)
Gets back in Sun. morning about 6:30am
Goes to his part time Sun. morning around 8:30am-3pm
I cooked him breakfast (t-bone steak and eggs), dropped it off to him, and left around 10am today.
Grand total I spent maybe 45 waking minutes with him all weekend. I just had a personal rant session over the fact that I drove 200mi (round trip) for that 45min.
…
I never thought about it before, but apparently stockings on guys can look really hot.
(Kind of wonder what straight men might think of this. I’m bi.)
Generally speaking straight men don’t find men hot no matter what they wear because… they’re men.
I wouldn’t expect them to. I’m just wondering what not-finding-it-hot reaction(s) might be typical. Such as: “I can see how gays/women might like this, but I’m not into that”; “meh, whatever”; “Ha,ha that looks stupid”; “OMG sexy thing on a non-sexy person, stop breaking my brain”; or something else.
Personally, “meh, whatever” .
In context it makes me a bit tired of women who feel the need to congratulate themselves on how they’re attracted to non-traditional-gender-performing men.
My reactions as a hetero man are twofold.
First, “Whatever. Sexy thing on non-sexy person still not make person sexy.”
Second, “Sure. I could wear that. If someone would appreciate it.”
I always thought the wearer got a bigger kick out of it than the viewer, and I’m gay.
I love wearing panties and stockings and, although I’d like to say I look as good in them as Mr. Gordon-Levitt up above, I’m just happy my current girlfriend likes me the way I am
Since this is an open thread I would like to comment on something I have been thinking about since the thread about rage.
I have seen many men claim they are feminists. But can anyone show me a white, obese, 40-year old virgin kind of man that it public with his feminist support? I keep getting the feeling that male feminists are white upper middle class men who feel they can afford to sacrifice things.
Is “upper middle class” the opposite of “obese 40 year old virgin”?
You may be on to something about self-identified feminist men being more likely to come from privileged groups, probably because feminist men are more likely to have gone through tertiary education. But I think that’s about the extent of it.
I might have used a bit clumsy language, but the general idea is that I want to se someone on the bottom of society talking about how women suffer the most.
One example of the paradox I have discovered is the male feminist take on female sexual freedom. The importance of female sexual freedom from men seems to come from men who have everything to gain from that freedom, e.g. Hugo Schwyzer. I would like to see a man who has been rejected for all his life, who knows that he will probably die alone who is still an outspoken feminist.
And regarding teritiary education. George W. Bush went to Yale and Harvard, most of his governement had advanced degrees.
I fit into the category you describe very well, 28, 6’3″ athletic, well endowed, middle class with respectable job and hobbies, good sense of humor, but there is 2 details that negate all of the above, Middle eastern brown + socially awkward due to traumatic childhood which extended into early adulthood. The funny thing about that last part is, the social awkwardness is only with women due to literally a LIFETIME of rejection. I don’t think I would ever call myself a feminist (even though I am a protester and worked with feminists closely for extended periods of time, and do consider myself a humanist) Because even in the most accepting (as least as it is claimed) circles, men are often marginalized, while women are idealized. That is typically the default mode, as it is rare for the distinction for gender feminism to be distinguished from equality feminism.
I think I should clarify the point I am trying to make, this is an emotionally charged issue for me as I have recently been friend-zoned by a feminist, but the point I am trying to make is this, it doesn’t take being on the bottom rung of society to be shunned by society, you can infact work very hard and fit surprisingly well into the “man-box” of society. But even then it doesn’t matter because people will still discriminate for arbitrary reasons. So expecting someone who is on the bottom rung and likely uneducated to be a feminist is about as ridiculous as the “mediocrity principal” (in its suggestion that it has not occurred already ) that was stated in another article on this site.
My husband barely qualifies as middle class like me, didn’t finish college, had trouble with dating as a teenager, and came from a broken home, and yet here he is, a feminist and ally.
I think just men with good role models are more likely to be egalitarian.
Since this is an open thread I would like to comment on something I have been thinking about since the thread about rage.
I have seen many men claim they are feminists. But can anyone show me a white, obese, 40-year old virgin kind of man that it public with his feminist support? I keep getting the feeling that male feminists are white good-looking upper middle class men who feel they can afford to sacrifice things.
Alternatively, those with nothing to lose.
I don’t normally say that I am feminist, but I freak out publicly when the daily rape culture comes around, much more than most people I know.
can’t say I really like the picture. When it comes to whoI’m actually interacting with or being attracted to, I’m very much gender-traditionalist.
Pic is kind of sexy, but the expression on his face is off-putting.
I agree. There is something about this picture that intrigues me. It attracts me and repels me at the same time. I think the expression on his face is makes the viewer a little uncomfortable. It’s good art because regardless of whether you like it or hate it, it evokes a strong emotional response.
I agree, perhaps if he had a Spring hat and eye make up on it would be softer.
I didn’t really used to feel this way, but man, lately there is something I find SO HOT about men (and people in general) who are comfortable enough with themselves to do that kind of thing. Joseph Gordon-Levitt in lingerie, Paul Rudd and Jason Segel making out in a skit on SNL, Zach Galifianakis posing in a leotard for a magazine, Justin Timberlake wearing a leotard and heels for the parody of the “Single Ladies” music video with Beyonce… Seriously.
I think there’s something really amazing about the whole “none of the clothing I wear will modify, change, or invalidate my own sexuality or the core of who I am, because I love who I am” thing. This goes for Noah Brand too–and his clothes were off!
Some people might argue that it’s just because those celebrity guys have nothing to lose, but on the contrary, I think it’s when you are sure of yourself and confident in who you are, nothing in society can touch you: not society’s clothing rules, not gender stereotypes, not what your friends think. Nothing.
I wish there were more women out there like you!
I do too.
Running, jumping, climbing trees, putting on makeup when you get there?
Stockings, yay! But needs more arm-length gloves. I LOVE arm-length gloves.
I wish I could dress a little more… Flamboyantly. My mother won’t let me shave my legs or wear stockings. Which is weird, she’s fine with my ‘being a gay dude,’ like, 90% of the time… And then has random points where it’s like “Suddenly homophobic comment! Now back to loving caring ally.” And I can’t really complain I’m not allowed to dress flamboyantly enough. I can have brightly colored suits, but nothing… ‘girly’ like long hair or shaved legs.
Even though my legs make me look like I’m wearing heavy leg-warmers and are in no way attractive to me.
I hope you don’t mind my rambling, I kinda took “Open thread” to mean “Say whatever you want.” I hope that was the proper interpretation, that seems like it should be.
OK! New internet video. This is a short (less than 6 minutes) from a movie/game reviewer (mostly on the escapist) named MovieBob:
http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/the-big-picture/5950-Tropes-vs-MovieBob
His feminist argumentation doesn’t seem BAD per-se, but I think he tends to miss the notion behind the arguments that he is addressing. Yes portrayal of women in games is bad/problematic, and those who refuse to see it should probably go play Bayonetta then come back to me and try to refuse it again with a straight face.
At the same time Ozy’s law is in effect, and I think his presentation would have been a lot more palatable had he acknowledged some of the sexism (or if the reader prefers, “bigotry” since “sexism” is occasionally defined such that sexism against men cannot exist) against men, but focused on the sexism/bigotry against women instead of trying to minimize the sexism/bigotry against men as he does.
Oh Moviebob, how I do hate him. Either be a stereotype of a fat gamer fanboy who dissects women’s attractiveness (just watch his videos, that’s what he does for laughs), or talk about social justice. Don’t try and be both. At least That Guy With The Glasses – a site full of deliciously fucked up characters played by the nicest of people – do other stuff both in and out of character so they don’t look like one-note hypocrites.
And on a similar note, does anyone find it more disheartening when a white, cis, middle-class man is all like “lol misandry doesn’t exist we need to protect the wimmenz” than when a woman might say the same?