The Secret to Lasting Relationships

Going into the last relationship means it’s not just made but nurtured, and loved for a long time. The world might succumb to the idea that a little love can be enough to hold a relationship together, but it doesn’t.

Of course, the foundation is love, that’s true, but the house is raised by a joint effort, a sense of understanding, and a willingness to forgo going through growth as a couple and individually.

It Starts with Knowing Yourself

The most important thing to a lasting relationship is realizing yourself. Until you don’t even know what you need, or want, that feels good to you, and don’t know shit about what you want to keep for yourself, you can’t truly love anyone.

It’s losing yourself in someone, not in someone else — it’s being both mutually there and taking up all of you and your partner taking up all of them.

The Bridge That Holds Everything Together

Any relationship is only as good as open and honest communication. It’s not about just talking; it’s about actually listening. That’s the other one: listening to what your partner says and the emotion behind it.

Really ‘Opportunities’ of open communication are opportunities to get in touch with the misunderstandings towards which the distance can appear.

The Art of Compromise

The most perfect thing is that no two people are the same. Relationships with rich and rich differences require compromising. In relationships, living means they know how to meet in the middle, not because they have to but because they love and love the other.

Trust: The Unshakeable Foundation

Even the strongest bonds have no trust upon which they lean. Faith is not all of trust, it’s being a reliable, consistent, honest person. It’s having someone who has your back no matter what, period, for me.

Growing Together, Not Apart

People change. For smooth growth, it’s a must, and therefore, your relationship should grow together, not grow apart. It simply implies you have to work in support of each other’s dream as you continue to nurture the team, yet avoid mugging your own business!

Forgiveness: The Healing Balm

But relationships are always challenging. Things will get hurt, and mistakes will be made. The most important thing in staying with a partner is not ‘excusing bad behavior’ but giving someone space to rebuild trust.

Celebrate the Little Things

Love isn’t just some lovey-lovey stuff; it’s in the smaller with all the more everyday stuff. The way you bid good morning, laughter in a room when two voices are in on an inside joke, the silent comfort of being in the same room with someone. It is celebrated to keep the spark going.

The Deeper Secret

But it would be if I only knew that love is more than a noun, it is a verb. It’s an action you take each day. The struggle is in understanding your partner, supporting him or her, and loving them.

In the end, relationships that last don’t always work one hundred percent but they are beautifully imperfect. They are a dance of two hearts, arms stretched, out to cover the other in the glow of their imperfections, while still holding one own arms in solidarity as they walk out to the unknowables of life. The trick isn’t to find the perfect person, the trick is to create a relationship where you’re better than you can be alone.

Enjoy the love you have then. Nurture it. Protect it. Growth into something that will be something you remember forever.

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This post was previously published on medium.com.

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