Relationships: Do We Have Each Other?

One phrase that keeps appearing in the dating environment of today is **situationship**. Though for many it has become a confusing emotional rollercoaster, it may appear casual and even harmless. Then what is a situationship? It’s the transition between two people who are “sort of” together but not officially dating.

Even while you are spending time together, sharing emotions, and even being physical, there is no label, no obvious path, and often no commitment. Let’s be honest: it could feel like a trap. At first, a situationship could seem ideal. There’s no pressure, no great expectations, and plenty of room to “see where things go.” Especially for those who are recuperating from past relationships, focusing on their personal growth, or are simply unsure about their wants, such flexibility can be freeing. But over time, one or both sides usually start to feel uncomfortable.

You begin to question: *Are we unique? Will we make it? Must I bring them to family events? Are they even as worried about me as I am about them? The emotional murkiness of the situationship starts to set in then. In fact, in our day and age, dedication has become more challenging. Many dread revealing their weakness.

Some people want the companionship, closeness, and emotional support of a relationship but not the resulting responsibilities. Some individuals really don’t want to hurt others, but they find it difficult to say they’re not prepared. Social internet provides people access to infinite options, hence many find it simpler to remain in a situationship than risk choosing the wrong person.

Uncertainty creates insecurity, which is the issue. In situationships, you often walk cautiously, hesitant to question “what are we?” for fear of offending the other person or getting a negative reaction. That dread may slowly erode your sense of worth. You start to take crumbs of love even if you merit the whole cake since you are happy to have something rather than nothing. Moreover, keep in mind that **not defining the link is still defining it**. Silence is a choice. Avoidance is the answer. Should you find yourself in a situationship, what should you do? First, be truthful with yourself. What is *your* actual want? If you are at ease with informal, that is fine. But, if you want something more—something consistent, clear, and committed—don’t deny your want to keep someone around. Talk then, too. Though it could be unpleasant or even scary, asking for clarification shows self-respect. If they really care, the other person will also want to be honest. It is also a response, therefore, should they avoid the subject or give vague answers. At last, remember that **you deserve a partnership that leaves no questions**. Love should feel like certainty instead of doubt. It should rather empower you than let you in doubt. Should a situationship be keeping you from experiencing the sort of connection you truly desire, do not hesitate to terminate it. In a world teeming with “almosts,” have the guts to wait for something real. — Would you want this to be a radio script or social media caption?

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This post was previously published on medium.com.

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