5 Social Media Habits That Are Actually Cheating

Many of us associate cheating with physical affairs. But in the age of social media, cheating has evolved. It now lives inside our phones.

There’s a thin line between innocent social media interaction and a full-fledged emotional affair.
The downside of social media is that it’s full of temptations, and it can make the lines blurry when it comes to loyalty.

Although every couple defines boundaries differently, we can all agree on one thing: cheating is a form of betrayal.

Here are five social media habits that are actually cheating.

1. Flirting via DMs

Messaging someone of the opposite sex in itself isn’t necessarily cheating, but sliding into someone’s DMs with the intention of flirting is. Sending someone else heart eyes emojis, flirty compliments, and other inappropriate messages aren’t acceptable.

A general rule of thumb is that if you wouldn’t want your significant other to see it, it’s probably cheating. Ask yourself if your partner would be okay with whatever you’re sending. Or better yet, would you be okay with your significant other sending this message to someone else? If not, then you probably shouldn’t be sending it.

2. Engaging With Someone Else’s Content

Engaging with posts is what social media is intended for. But if you consistently and excessively like and comment on someone else’s posts, it might be emotional cheating.

Ask yourself this question: Are you engaging with someone else’s posts because you’re being friendly and supportive of the content you’re posting? Or are you liking and commenting on them because you’re looking to give (or get) attention from them? Are you crushing on the other person?

Think about how your partner would feel if they scrolled through this person’s posts and saw your likes or comments. Would they be upset by it? If so, it’s worth taking your own intentions into consideration.

3. Hiding Your Social Media Connections

Are you following people who your partner doesn’t know about? It could be people who you know in real life, such as a coworker you’re secretly crushing on or an ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend. Or it could be an online figure, such as a porn star.

Maybe you have your social media connections private so that your significant other can’t see who you follow. Or maybe you’ve gone as far as to create a ‘finsta’ (fake Instagram) account so that your partner doesn’t find out the truth. This secretive behavior shows that you’re crossing boundaries that you know shouldn’t be crossed.

4. Posting Content For Attention

Are you posting shirtless gym selfies or bikini photos? That in itself isn’t a sign of cheating. But the real question is: are you doing it because you want attention from other people?

Posting thirst traps to gain attention from people who aren’t your partner is a clear sign of emotional cheating. While no physical lines have been crossed (yet), seeking validation from people who aren’t your significant other is a huge red flag.

5. Reconnecting with an Ex (And Hiding It From Your Partner)

Social media can make it easy to fall back into talking to an ex. It can feel nostalgic, and in some cases, it might even be innocent. But if those conversations become regular or emotional, it can absolutely be a form of emotional cheating — especially if you’re keeping it a secret from your current partner.

Even if you have no intentions of getting back together with your ex, the emotional connection you might still have via social media could still be dangerous territory. This is another area where you might want to consider how your current significant other would feel about these conversations. If it would make them uncomfortable, then it’s another situation where it probably shouldn’t be happening.

Cheating Can Be More Than Physical

Although we all have our own boundaries when it comes to cheating, the reality is that physical lines don’t need to be crossed to cheat. These five social media behaviors can all be considered cheating.

Trust, transparency, and mutual respect are important when it comes to the success of any healthy relationship. If you’re unsure whether what you’re doing crosses the line, I encourage you to consider how you would feel if your partner were doing the same.

If the answer is no, then it might be time to evaluate both your social media behavior and the relationship as a whole.

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This post was previously published on medium.com.