When You Try to Hug Your Wife From Behind

What happens when you try to hug your wife from behind?
And she moves like you are damn, Michael Myers, trying to murder her.

One man explained his situation, “A few minutes ago, I walked into the bathroom to find my wife naked, about to jump into the shower. I walked up and kissed the small of her back, which she allowed, and then I went lower and gave her a gentle kiss on the butt. She jerked away a little and said, ‘Okay,’ in an uncomfortable, ‘that’s enough’ tone.”

Hello, dead bedroom.
You are now treated like you have an infectious plague.

“Can’t I enjoy my coffee in peace?”

“Beds are for sleep.”

“I just want to take a shower.”

All the standard reasons for not wanting to touch. But it’s your spouse. The guy above explained, “So, is your body off limits to me? We’re fucking married. I’m not your dad. I’m not a stranger. I’m not your boyfriend in junior high that you hold hands with at the movies on Friday, and that’s our relationship. I’m an adult man who is MARRIED to you. So sick of this shit.”

He’s ripe for stepping out.

I guarantee he’ll be looking for a lover soon.

The recoiling from touch doesn’t bode well for their marriage. And if he drops the bomb, “Your sex negativity is unacceptable, and unless you change, this marriage is going to die,” he’s creating even more problems on top of the no sex issue.

And the reality behind this dead bedroom was that his wife had just had a baby. He revealed that nugget in the comments. He should have led with the “we have a young baby, and I’m so horny.” SHE WAS STILL BREASTFEEDING. Dude, c’mon. It’s normal not to want to fuck when her body is wiped out physically from lack of sleep and nursing.

Redditors weighed in:

I think she doesn’t enjoy having sex.
Just divorce already.
Don’t initiate anything. Wait until she wants to have sex with you.
I think she has a one-year-old baby, is still breastfeeding, and just wanted to take a shower.

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The lack of sex and intimacy is normal in this baby scenario, but it doesn’t mean that their dead bedroom won’t escalate further.

So what works?

Maybe telling her how the forced abstinence is making you feel. “I am forced to invest more and more time and energy into my disappointment, frustration, and loneliness because of our lack of intimacy. If we can’t come to a solution, my feelings will turn into resentment and despair. I need to know if having a healthy sex life is important to you.”

He will know the answer whether or not she responds.

If she doesn’t give his feelings weight, she doesn’t care enough to invest in the marriage. If she gives him lip service, he holds on, hoping for a change that may never come.

The problem is that he may never get the truth.

What is the solution?

Accept a sexless marriage? Cheat to get the sex and intimacy he needs? Divorce and break up his new family? None of these options is viable. They all involve pain and suffering (a lot for everyone involved, ask me how I know).

Yet, this is what happens to so many in a dead bedroom.

Let’s hope this man and wife can figure out their issues for the sake of their new family.

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