On December 20, 1958, I made my MOM a mother for the first time.
On August 7, 2021, my MOM passed away.
Nonetheless, we continued to love each other and I like to think that we both grew from those conversations.
I am faced with the challenge that comes with experiencing Mother’s Day without my mother.
When I was a kid, I remember doing my best to make Mother’s Day special for my MOM. I was in elementary school when I saved my allowance to buy MOM a small silver jewelry box. I rode my bicycle to the village where we lived in New Jersey and bought it ahead of time so I could make sure to wrap it and put it with a card.
I can see my MOM’s smile when she opened the gift box in my mind today. I knew it made her feel special.
There were countless Mother’s Days when we would buy flowering plants for my MOM to have in the yard or on the porch. To this day, Snapdragons and Petunias remind me of going to the garden shop and picking out the healthiest looking plants.
Seeing spring flowers today brings me back to being a kid and giving my MOM those Snapdragons, Petunias, and Marigolds.
Mother’s Day this year will be different in many ways. I won’t be able to call my MOM and wish her a Happy Mother’s Day or give her that gift that was intended to mean so much to her.
One of the things I miss most about my MOM not being here is the talks we used to have mostly on Saturday mornings or during my drive to the office in the mornings. During my global travels, I always called my mom when I arrived at my destination. There were many times that I talked with her from the Shanghai Airport to my hotel which gave us both peace of mind while I was on the other side of the world.
MOM and I usually started a talk about the weather she was experiencing and then would go on to more significant and meaningful topics.
Sometimes we talked about what was going on for me with my work and other times we talked about our health. MOM was always supportive and knew the right things to say when I was going through a tough time. She often reminded me to keep my chin up and most of the time those words from MOM were enough to lift my spirits.
I am grateful that I had the wherewithal to sit with MOM for a conversation early one morning over a cup of tea when she was visiting me.
She told me that she had a pail list of things that she wanted to do before she died. I asked what is it a pail list to which she replied because I can’t afford the bucket.
From that conversation, MOM and I took five cruises in five years. The one-on-one time we had gave us ample time to share stories and enjoy lots of laughs and some tears. The memories that we made together gave us, even more, to talk about after each cruise.
The memories of our cruises make me smile when I think of our adventures in places like Tunisia, Sweden, and Costa Rica. They also make me cry when I realize there will be no more cruises with MOM.
So in the end, it may seem like this Mother’s Day I will be motherless when in reality I can be as close as I want to my MOM. Keeping my MOM in my heart during Mother’s Day will make me feel like she is still here with me.
How will you honor your MOM on Mother’s Day?
What stories do you and your MOM share when you talk with each other?
How do you celebrate your MOM the other 364 days of the year?
With much gratitude…
