The Psychology of Intimate Relationships

The psychology of intimate relationships has been studied by psychologists for many years. Many theories and studies have been conducted to try and understand why these relationships work. While no one answer fits all relationships, some generalizations can be made. It is generally agreed that any relationship begins with a glow, great joy, and a state of overwhelming happiness that cannot be measured. Still, after several months a kind of calm and perhaps some boredom dominates the relationship. The parties get lost if they do not really realize the message and purpose of the relationship, so admiring the look, appearance, dress, etc., of external manifestations is beautiful.

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“When you cultivate quality relationships, not only do you feel better and help your friends feel better, but you contribute to an increase of joy, love, and peace in the world.” — Tara Bianca,

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Scientific facts about the psychology of love:

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Scientists and researchers have found that the morning kiss can stimulate hormones in the body, help a person accept daily stresses, and deal with them properly.
Psychology experts have found that when a person gets nostalgic about a love relationship that happened and ended in the past, his nostalgia is for the state he felt in that relationship and not for the former lover per se.
The word (Love) in English is derived from a Greek word meaning desire, which confirms that the ancients knew perfectly well that love is often mixed with desire.
Scientists have found that the love hormone, whose production increases significantly in the partners involved in the emotional relationship, has the same effect as cocaine; it causes addiction just like it, and this explains the cases of psychological breakdown when the relationship ends abruptly; that is, what more or less resembles the sudden cessation of cocaine use.
A lot of staring leads to falling in love; therefore, if you do not want to get involved in a relationship, psychology advises you not to look too long because you will almost certainly fall into the hole.
Scientists confirm that the most that can heal a person from fatigue and relieve him from psychological and physical exhaustion are a partner’s lap due to stimulating hormones.
What is the most important thing a woman wants from a man in a romantic relationship?

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The psychology of a woman may sometimes be different from the psychology of a man. For instance, in emotional relationships, a may woman wants something basic from a man–which is to be present. To be able to be present even in moments of your absence can be achieved with the following tips:

Be in contact with her, check on her and discuss the smallest things that are going through in her life, and promise her any minor bump that she is going through will be a topic that calls for your attention.
Choose gifts that remind her of you always; ones will last her for a long time, as she does not feel your absence from her, and she feels your presence and presence as if you exist.
Listen to her even in your busy times, and try to find the time, even if you have to temporarily stop the task in your hands, because her feeling that you are busy can break your presence.

What real containment should a man give to a woman?

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There is something very basic and important for a woman in an emotional relationship, which is the ability to contain because a woman may have a much wider range of emotions than a man is comfortable with.

This is unlike the psychology of a man, who seeks stability and controls his mood in a straight line, which he likes in most cases; he feels nervous about what he sees of the frequent ups and downs in the female mood, and here comes the role of containment by the man; this is not by suppressing himself and trying to calm her down while he is nervous from the inside and wants this state to end immediately, but by accepting this state that the female is going through, and accepting her while she is in this state, and loves her when she is in this state, and this is the real containment.

Suppose a man can truly fit into women’s classes and situations. In that case, he will be blessed with the presence of tremendous feminine energy that helps him in all areas of his professional, scientific, social, psychological, and emotional life.

What basics should every woman learn in dealing with a man?

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A man often has a hunter’s mentality: every woman should know perfectly well that any man, regardless of his current level of thinking and his scientific and cultural level, is historically a hunter’s being, who has been out of the house since time immemorial and then returns with what he feeds his wife and children, and is happy with the praise he receives, whether verbally or on the faces of his wife and children, from happiness and love with what he brought with him from fishing.
Praise all the time and when: based on the above, praise is the most important thing that motivates a man and gives him happiness, confidence, and self-realization, and a woman must give more of this praise because praise always makes him happy and he goes in the direction of making her happy to share this happiness that she gave him.
Give him confidence: every woman needs to give her partner the confidence he needs to take from him what she wants. Masculinity is strength, mission, and the formation of role models, which are things that a man will be able to achieve only through self-confidence; that is, repeat the phrases that give him full confidence in himself, such as: “I trust your abilities blindly, of course, you can do it, you are my husband, lover and the strongest man in the world,” when a man has this confidence, he will move towards his mission and goal, and the other party will be overwhelmed with happiness and euphoria that he will reach thanks to this confidence.
The clarity in expression: due to the historical function of women caring for children, women have acquired through the ages the skills of emotional intelligence, non-verbal communication, and Reading Body Language; This is because young children are unable to express what is inside them in words, the mother had to try to constantly read their body language, and understand everything they want from facial expressions and crying, but this skill is not a woman should be clear about what she wants from a man.
Love him for what he is: man, by the hunter mentality rooted in him for millions of years, is a being who hates loss and may be dominated by refraction and frustration when defeated, and here comes your role as a female not only by standing by him; but by showing him your love even in the darkest circumstances, and proving to him that you love him as he is, whether he is a winner or a loser, rich or poor, successful or unsuccessful, and this kind of love is unconditional love, which is the highest degree of love.
Help him to fulfill his mission: the man insists on having a pivotal and essential role in life, and his main goal is to deliver his message, so help him with his needs and achieve his goals, and in return, when he feels this, he will return the favor to you exponentially.
Allow him to free his feelings: no matter how tough a man is on the outside and looks like a strong and dominant personality, inside, every man is a small child full of feelings and sensations that need to be embraced and knows well that his crying in your lap is not only proof of his love for you and your closeness to him; but also proof of his mental and psychological strength, he knows perfectly well that he is a human being in the end, and every human has feelings, and these feelings must come out to make him stronger than before, and not a sign of weakness.
Allowing him to live his life: in the case of mutual trust, it is very important to be flexible about his personal life and his friends; it is better to leave him free to go out with his friends of both sexes and be happy about that because tightening the noose on him will make him alienate from the relationship in one way or another, and may push him to lie to go out for a walk with his friends, as the most frightening thing for a man from a relationship is his fear for his freedom.

What is the secret to the success of the relationship between the two partners?

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The most important element in the success of a relationship between a man and a woman is the intention; if the intention of one of the parties to a relationship or marriage is to get rid of his sadness or to become a happy person, or to fulfill a psychological or physical desire, he will certainly not meet any success in this relationship, if the person’s goal in the relationship is to achieve personal gain, failure is his inevitable fate.

This egotistical and selfish intention will turn the relationship into a one-sided benefit, and this does not make sense; the word relationship requires the presence of two people and not one person; so the secret to the success of any relationship is to understand the message of the relationship, which is to develop and elevate yourself and the other from the lower self to the higher self, and to use the energy of love to solve the problems facing you, and get a better reality, both in terms of material and external circumstances surrounding, or in terms of psychological stability and inner peace for both parties.

Key message: A true partner is a partner who takes out your energies and encourages you to use them optimally, who embraces you in a time of weakness, and helps you to develop, prosper and improve yourself and your life.

Sources: 1 2 3 4 6 7 8

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This post was previously published on medium.com.

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