Flirting is a real skill that most people don’t have. They’re either too scared or too inexperienced. The first goal when you’re with a woman is to drop her anxiety and make sure she’s comfortable with you. If she thinks you’re creepy, then there’s no point in flirting with her since that’ll only turn her off.
It is important to learn and know how can you drop the anxiety and start flirting. If you can align your thoughts with her thoughts, you can start a connection. If she is in trouble or confused about anything, give her a hand, and make her feel you are there with her. This will reduce her anxiety. It doesn’t matter what the problem is.
Don’t be too intimidating, lean back and give her space and time to think. Be genuinely interested in what she says, but don’t be interested in achieving some sort of outcome. If you’ve done this, you can see that she’s comfortable.
Complimenting correctly is another important trick in the art of flirting. A lot of dudes still compliment women incorrectly. They usually skip the first crucial step, which is reassuring the woman that you’re with that you’re not a weirdo or a creep. And if you don’t do this, the compliment will be seen as a desperate attempt.
It’s really important to remember that when you give a compliment, it has to be original. Here’s what you should not say you look beautiful or you have beautiful eyes. She hears that too often. She sees that in movies.
You can compliment her about her eyes, but give them an original twist, for example, say that shade of blue I’ve never seen before. That’s crazy. When in fact, she just has normal blue eyes. The point is to make the compliments stick. Another common mistake when it comes to giving a compliment is doing it too frequently.
The more compliments you give, the less their value don’t just throw them out there. And if she tries to provoke the compliments, don’t give them. It is a tool that you have to use tactically. If you do it right. You’re already in a good position as someone she likes to be around.
When you’re talking to a girl, your body language is critical. If you lean too far in and act aggressive, she will feel anxious. You being that close feels desperate. That’s why you should lean back and take a chill. If she knows that you aren’t that interested in what is going to happen next, she’ll be way more comfortable and it makes it easier to have a conversation. If you’re touching her, do it super gently.
If you are aggressively touching her, stop. If you’re doing an unprompted out of the blue, here’s what you have to keep in mind. If you do go for a touch, timing is everything you tell a joke, make her laugh and you can slightly touch her leg or shoulder.
Once you have broken the touch barrier, don’t overuse it, but from time to time do it. Since this subconsciously creates a connection. Another great tip for the tall man is to sit down and get on her level. This way, she won’t be that intimidated by you.
Try to understand, and even mirror, her emptions. If she’s sad, you’re sad. Even if you’re not, you don’t try and fix her issues, she doesn’t even want that. She only wants you to listen, that’s all you have to do.
It’s super simple to pick up someone’s spirits when they’re down, just kind of reaffirm whatever it is they’re saying in the opposite direction and ask questions, ask personal, intimate involved questions.
If you are confident, you’ll quickly realize that talking to anyone is not hard. You also have to realize that the other person may be more insecure than you are. And if you still don’t have the confidence, I would recommend trying to flirt with women whether or not you are attracted to them. This should build up that flirting skill quite well.
If you shut down when it’s an attractive girl, at least you need to engage with more attractive girls daily. It’s not rocket science. The skill takes time and effort.
If you don’t know each other that well and you aren’t dating, then it’s perfectly fine to flirt, as long as you are always respectful of boundaries. It’s even better when you do it in the beginning. Why does this make her anxiety drop rapidly since other girls are showing interest in you? For some reason, she won’t see you as a creep and she’ll be interested in who you are.
You need to practice your flirting skills. If you have the skills, you should be able to stand out easily. If you aren’t practicing, or flirting with women as much as you can, then you are wasting valuable time to learn. That skill game is something that comes with practice. And the right info, if you have a group of friends who aren’t busy you can go out and practice a skill with.
Don’t shower her with too much attention. You probably heard that if something is worth doing, it’s worth your undivided attention. A high-value man won’t be so quick to get wrapped up in her world. So here’s the trick, withdraw your attention momentarily, do something else.
Let her see that you have a life of your own, but your attention is valuable and not to be taken for granted, control your emotions and presence.
Gathering different experiences that you can share. Create happiness around you, creating your happiness is the mark of an authentic man in an era where many depend on others for pleasure and let external factors dictate their joy.
You don’t want to be the guy who needs her to be happy. You probably heard a lot of men say she’s my happiness and think that that’s a good thing.
A man who brings happiness today is like an oasis in the desert
Be classy in your ways. Class is not synonymous with wealth. It is an attitude, a reputation, and how you interact with the world. People with class can always find money. Class is about being polite gracious and hospitable. It is in the attention to detail and how you present yourself from the attire to even your scent.
I believe learning and practicing these tips can make you attractive and an expert in the art of love and flirting. Thanks for reading.
This post was previously published on medium.com.
***
From The Good Men Project on Medium
 |
 |
 |
 |
***
Join The Good Men Project as a Premium Member today.
All Premium Members get to view The Good Men Project with NO ADS.
A $50 annual membership gives you an all access pass. You can be a part of every call, group, class and community.
A $25 annual membership gives you access to one class, one Social Interest group and our online communities.
A $12 annual membership gives you access to our Friday calls with the publisher, our online community.
Register New Account
Need more info? A complete list of benefits is here.
—–
Photo credit: Priscilla Du Preez 🇨🇦 on Unsplash
