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I was the event planner for a friend’s wedding (you know those kinds of friends who just drop things on you and emotionally blackmail you into doing them by playing the “we have been friends for so many years now” card, and you fall for their very cheap blackmails). Well, there was an incident that happened, which gave me a cause for concern.
We were picking the colors for the wedding, and my friend’s groom to be decided to pick pink as his color while my friend picked blue as her color – and my friend’s parents screamed (the way parents scream when they want to make their concern known). How is it that you and your husband-to-be are choosing the wrong colors? Instead of choosing the color that is meant for a man, he is choosing a girl’s color, what kind of nonsense is that?
This led to a forty-five minutes lecture (trust parents who lookout for opportunities to have teachable moments) on colors that belong to a man and colors that belong to a woman. It was that day I learned that pink is a feminine color because it is soft and warm, while blue is a male color because it is strong and loud – I wonder who made these designations, LOL.
This got me thinking, how much of “male and female stuff” go on in the workplace, and it dawned on me, that this whole idea of feminism, equal pay, and inclusion has created a division among male and female in the workforce and created a bias towards women which in most cases is unnoticed, or where it is noticed, it is swept under the carpet without bringing any of the discrimination laws into action.
Men have become victims, honestly, and here is my proof:
This is a Woman’s Job
Most industries, especially the financial industry, prefers to hire women for positions such as teller, customer service, or marketing executives, not based on skills, experience, or the suitability, but mainly since these roles have been labeled and designated “women’s job.” So, there is an opening in a company for any of these positions, a woman is preferred and seen as the prime candidate as against men, and this is not because she is more skillful, or better qualified, and so can deliver more value. It is simply based on this fact alone; a woman is more suited for the job.
I Just Became a Mother
A friend of mine complained to me recently about how unfair he is being treated at work – the boss does not cut him some slacks, but makes excuses for his colleague at the office called Meg. I asked him what he meant, and he said Meg is a new mother, and she comes late to work, and sometimes doesn’t come at all without taking prior excuse from work simply because she is a new mother, or her child is running a fever. He is also a new father, and there are nights where he does not sleep because his twin boys are crying by 2 in the morning for breast milk, or his wife is crying from the stress of the boys. This makes him distracted at the office or sleeps at work. He was queried the other day for coming late to work, while Mrs. Meg, who came later than himself, was patted on the back and given kudos simply for being a new mom and also coming to work.
Power Play
The common stories that are always making the rounds at workplaces are those of how a junior female colleague is badly treated by her male senior colleague simply because she turned down his sexual advances.
While this is something that has become normal in the workplace, people are no longer surprised when they hear about something like this. However, when a junior male worker complains that he feels he is maligned and treated badly by a senior colleague because he turned down her advances, the guy is laughed at and not taken seriously.
Positive discrimination
More often than not, establishments misinterpret the actual meaning of terms like ‘positive action,’ and in their quest to achieve what they wrongly perceive to be positive actions, they end up demonstrating what is actually “positive discrimination.” But who can blame them? We live in a society where it is generally believed that women are grossly underrepresented in the work-force, and as a result of that, a lot of provisions need to be made for the few that are in the field as a form of compensation. Consequently, in many establishments, they are offered provisions, perks, and other benefits that their male counterparts don’t have access to, even though in some cases, some male workers rightfully deserved these perks too.
As much as we are gradually becoming aware of gender equality and girl power, we must be careful that we do not create more dividing lines and stereotypes.
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This content is sponsored by Uday Tank.
Photo: Shutterstock